The making of the ultra noob

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  • Lohman446
    Useful posts: 7
    • Jun 2003
    • 9315

    #1

    The making of the ultra noob

    There was a recent team practice at the field I usually play at where teams were invited to come in and just play the field in a "high end" rec day type thing in preperation for a tournament. Teams were able to stay together or not, and then pick up players as needed.

    Now, most people think its the marker that defines someone, I tried to buy an Ion but as they were sold out ended up with a PMR. No big deal, this is still a "low end" marker that is kept obviously stock.

    I don't think its the marker most people look at, where everyone had dressed in full tournament gear I had thrown on a pair of denim jeans, some underarmour, and a t-shirt. Yeh, I have all the gear, or enough at home still, but did not feel like doing this. Add to this simple non-paintball cleats (I like better anyways) and people were getting the impression I had no spot being there. I did stuff a single pod into the pocket of my denim jeans.

    Interestingly enough I was seldom picked early on picking teams and most people ignored me. Sure I had friends there who knew me, but they were for the most part not trying to stand out. The first game I ask my new teammates the concept of the game - they send me up the deathtrap that is the middle of that particular field. No big deal I hold it a few moments, then make a break to the right snake, shimmie down it, and cause the other team fits, along with eliminating many of them. Eventually I get hit, no big deal. The whole day kinda went like this :).

    So... last week my denim jeans found that they do not like turf and were destroyed in that epiphany. I ordered a set of - ready for this CAMO BDU pants. Not just any camo, least someone think I am an experienced woodsballer just coming in for a game or two, but URBAN CAMO.

    My new goal is to fit into the newbie category as much as possible when walking on field :). My first tournament Im allowed to play bottom bracket (taking my sister who has never played and my g/f who has never played). I think the team name Innocent works ideally :).
    "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. Its not" - Dr Suess
  • shorty24
    Micro-pnue...
    • Aug 2004
    • 643

    #2
    This idea is made of so much win!

    I have done this on occasion myself, but alas, my BDUs no longer fit...
    Feedback

    Comment

    • ricwhic414
      Registered User
      • Aug 2006
      • 192

      #3
      I have always wanted to do that... Have fun and you will probably turn some heads

      Comment

      • turbo chicken
        waiting for MY pump kit...
        • Mar 2006
        • 568

        #4
        rocking the teeshirt and jeans + PGP = not a threat ... not getting attention on the speedball field is the best ever ... it definately helps when playing at a disadvantage ...

        When i wear the jersey and pants the only thing that is different is they don't ask if im sure if i want to play with the "advanced" players ... i still don't get attention because of the PGP but what the hey ...

        I wouldn't even have the raven jersey and pants if they weren't on clearance ... i got both for a total of 30.00 ... just couldn't pass up that deal.

        If i ever play in a tourney ... the teams uniforms will be jeans and teeshirts if it is hot and sweaters if it is cold ... with our team name and logo drawn on with a magic marker ...

        Comment

        • SCpoloRicker
          HA HA I'm custom!!1
          • Jan 2004
          • 4375

          #5
          *looks at hockey jersey and snowboard pants*

          God....I guess I was probably returning videotapes.

          Comment

          • paintballfiend
            I like pudding.
            • Jun 2006
            • 555

            #6
            Originally posted by turbo chicken
            I wouldn't even have the raven jersey and pants if they weren't on clearance ... i got both for a total of 30.00 ... just couldn't pass up that deal.
            ActionVillage FTW

            Comment

            • REDRT
              Mags, Y use anything else
              • Apr 2004
              • 1854

              #7
              You know what they say. The speed of light is faster than the speed of sound. That is why some people seem bright until they speak. You want to pose as a noob, start molding yourself like don miguel as an example. He has to be the reigning ultra noob.

              Comment

              • Desega
                Here's Johnny!
                • Sep 2004
                • 518

                #8
                I heard that! LOL great story, I've done that with my A5 a few times, makes me look less of a player than my timmy or my e-mag.
                I can't feel my toes . . .

                Comment

                • Lohman446
                  Useful posts: 7
                  • Jun 2003
                  • 9315

                  #9
                  Originally posted by REDRT
                  You know what they say. The speed of light is faster than the speed of sound. That is why some people seem bright until they speak. You want to pose as a noob, start molding yourself like don miguel as an example. He has to be the reigning ultra noob.
                  I'm sure DM is one of those annoying little kids who talks far too much trash in an attempt to overcome his own noobiness and fit in with the advanced players. One of those that made me quit the game for awhile last year. One of those that you just want to see if you can squeeze there neck hard enough to make there head pop off type :)
                  "Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. Its not" - Dr Suess

                  Comment

                  • buzzboy
                    Emo grass cuts inself
                    • Mar 2005
                    • 1322

                    #10
                    Originally posted by Lohman446
                    I'm sure DM is one of those annoying little kids who talks far too much trash in an attempt to overcome his own noobiness and fit in with the advanced players. One of those that made me quit the game for awhile last year. One of those that you just want to see if you can squeeze there neck hard enough to make there head pop off type :)

                    "Why You Little"

                    Comment

                    • buzzboy
                      Emo grass cuts inself
                      • Mar 2005
                      • 1322

                      #11
                      On the nubish side of things last time I went to play at a real facility my friend and I were almost brought to bring out a 98 C and a spyder plus some "bullets" but we never got to saddly.

                      I can say though that on many occations I have played speedball in flip flops.

                      Comment

                      • wjr
                        Registered User
                        • Feb 2006
                        • 995

                        #12
                        Every time I ply I always wear a pair of camo fatigues and a t-shirt. Heck, I don't even use pods. And mind you I play speedball exclusively.

                        That, coupled with a classic mag (most kids have no idea what it is) or Blazer (again), makes me look like a huge noob, especially when I run the Blazer on a gravity feed hopper.

                        People are always surprised when I end up shooting them.

                        Comment

                        • latches109

                          #13
                          The first time i played in lakeside, i wore board shorts, t-shirt, and sandals, (b/c i forgot my cammo) with a bunch of woodsballers. I was assumed a noob and picked close to last. What you wear commands respect.

                          Comment

                          • punkncat
                            One foot less
                            • Feb 2003
                            • 5841

                            #14
                            I try a very similar thing often. I will either go dressed in "non" paintball or all jungle BDU's. Generally it only works for a game or two before I am figured out.

                            Comment

                            • Tao
                              Registered User
                              • Jan 2006
                              • 834

                              #15
                              Originally posted by Lohman446
                              There was a recent team practice at the field I usually play at where teams were invited to come in and just play the field in a "high end" rec day type thing in preperation for a tournament. Teams were able to stay together or not, and then pick up players as needed.

                              Now, most people think its the marker that defines someone, I tried to buy an Ion but as they were sold out ended up with a PMR. No big deal, this is still a "low end" marker that is kept obviously stock.

                              I don't think its the marker most people look at, where everyone had dressed in full tournament gear I had thrown on a pair of denim jeans, some underarmour, and a t-shirt. Yeh, I have all the gear, or enough at home still, but did not feel like doing this. Add to this simple non-paintball cleats (I like better anyways) and people were getting the impression I had no spot being there. I did stuff a single pod into the pocket of my denim jeans.

                              Interestingly enough I was seldom picked early on picking teams and most people ignored me. Sure I had friends there who knew me, but they were for the most part not trying to stand out. The first game I ask my new teammates the concept of the game - they send me up the deathtrap that is the middle of that particular field. No big deal I hold it a few moments, then make a break to the right snake, shimmie down it, and cause the other team fits, along with eliminating many of them. Eventually I get hit, no big deal. The whole day kinda went like this :).

                              So... last week my denim jeans found that they do not like turf and were destroyed in that epiphany. I ordered a set of - ready for this CAMO BDU pants. Not just any camo, least someone think I am an experienced woodsballer just coming in for a game or two, but URBAN CAMO.

                              My new goal is to fit into the newbie category as much as possible when walking on field :). My first tournament Im allowed to play bottom bracket (taking my sister who has never played and my g/f who has never played). I think the team name Innocent works ideally :).

                              Congrats you have brought the concept of "Smurfing" from online gaming to paintball

                              Comment

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