"Because Quality Always Shoots Straight"

[gmag]

I was just thinking about the company motto. That's a good one....has a good sound to it. What are the other manufacturer's mottos? Like WGP, Indian Creek Designs, Kingman, etc....

[Miscue]

WGP: "Newton was mistaken."
WDP: "Our gun is $400 shinier than yours."
BE: "Don't worry about our warranty policy."
Smart Parts (Shockers): "220ci tank not included."
Kingman: "We don't do standards."
Bruiser: "What about our gun? Check out our bikini models!"
DYE: "$40 barrel, $60 laser-engraving."

[magking1971]

Now thats funny miscue!! HA

[jas142]

:D LOL, that's really funny

Tippmann: "Built like a rock, with stock accuracy like one too"

[netjunk1e]

I like to refer to Tippmans as : aroung the tree shots. Because i was killed when a ball(shot by Tippmann) curved around a tree and hit my gun.

Robbie Kimmell

[Skyssx]

NPS: What's a patent?
Airstar(?): Kevlar vest not included.
BE: If we buy every other company, people will HAVE to buy our stuff.

[zvanut]

miscue, u have too too much time on your hands

[Nitroduck]

Ah, lets see.

AKALMP = WORLD RENOUNED makers of low pressure, high cost equipment.

Proteam Products = No, we dont make anything under our own power, we get other companies to :)

Booyah = What? We went bankrupt? Nah, just give us a few days for chapter 11 to take effect so we can keep your guns.

[-Jôker-]

hey AGD can be two ways! "because quality shoots straight always" or the other way lol

[michael]

Tippmann: adding custom makes every thing sound better

[AGD]

LOL LOL!! I am crying over here!!!!

[slayer]

shocker "because bigger is better"
wgp "airsmith not included"
angel "better than yours because it cost more"

[Ground_zer0]

Brass Eagle= Leading the paintball industry in providing markers for driveby shootings.

WGP= Better distance and accuracy thru use of elves.

WDP= Making everything electronic because it looks cool.

Viewloader= Selling out to better provide you with deminished quality products.

JT= Because your goggles need a fan.

Odyssey Paintball Prodcuts (Halo Loader)= When you feel the urge to spray and pray, were there for you.

Uhh thats all I can think of.. not the funniest but some work. -Matt

[Skyssx]

You know the viewloader buy out was the two corporations... BE want's to buy name recognition, thats why they bought JT. Did you also know that the HALO is made by the designers of the revy?

WDP "Sex sells"
CCI "What's vaporware?"
KAPP "Ghetto 'R us"
Kingman "Flavor of the week"
APG "Ads plus guns"
Smart parts "What's a caliper?"
ZAP "Because $400 plastic markers always go over well"
AGD "It's still a glorified blowforward"

[Jonneh]

Originally posted by Miscue

WDP: "Our gun is $400 shinier than yours."

You win

[Jeb_Hoge]

PPS: "No, you can't have one" or "Custom still means something, but odd means something completely different".

[gmag]

Pretty funny, I wasn't expecting this...

[michael]

Tippmann: "willing to sacrifice quality for a higher price"

[michael]

FYI: im not a big tippmann fan anymore

[Load SM5]

Kingman-Where a cheap cosmetic bolt-on makes for a whole new gun.
WDP- Ever wonder what the temperature is in Guam? Ask the new 2002 Angel.
WGP- Like constant hissing noises?
BE- Warning, solvents will melt your marker.
Tippman- can be used in hand to hand combat


Hey, I'm working on it.

[AGD]

eventually going historic

AGD

[lonsch]

AGD: "13 BPS is child's play."

[thei3ug]

Originally posted by Jeb_Hoge
PPS: "No, you can't have one" or "Custom still means something, but odd means something completely different".

Jeb, you're evil...

and you guys forgot a few...

Arrow Precision... "Quality: we get it right the second time."

SP... "We just patented you."

LAPCO... "We pioneered everything... but we'll make it next year."

Arrmson... "you're kidding... rifling DOESN'T work?"

Bad Boyz Toyz... "We care."

APP... "The only company you've never heard of that you probably own a product from."

[Miscue]

Great American: "Our paint doesn't stink, now it comes in 'banana'."

JT: "Because looking like a pro is half the battle."

ANS: "We improve things better than anyone thought possible."

Diablo: "Shoots like darts, breaks on target, hard to wipe... guaranteed." -Satan (CEO)

[Paintballer86]

WGP: Got tools?

Brass Eagle: BE really stands for Bad Enganeering

E-Mag- Batterey NOT required

[zvanut]

miscue,

Great American: "Our paint doesn't stink, now it comes in 'banana'." , by far the best i have seen as of yet. The JT one was good too.

[spyderkiller]

Gosh you guys are killin me! This is one of the best threads of all time! Oh gosh....amazing. This goes to show that a lot of the people on AO have way too much time on their hands...but hey, that's not a bad thing!

[MaGSkEr]

Originally posted by slayer

wgp "airsmith not included"



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH heheh this is great. lol

[dawump]

JT: Camo Jerseys with Target and Bullseye!
Kingman: Inovation through Space Age Technology ( internals made of same plastic as forks on the Space Shuttle )
Brass Eagle: Watch Paint drop to the ground like a Brass Eagle
AGD: Original parts that make the after market suck
Angel: You get what you pay for.. Honest.
Angel: Free R2D2 included in every trigger frame.
Kingman: New Java finishes make your gun look cool from 100ft while you are hiding in the woods
Brass Eagle: Making it possible to shoot someone in Walmart

Keith

[Gecko]

agd: chopping your balls since 1988 (come on we have to pick on everyone :) )
kingman: we spell crap with a k
angel: use me abuse me sell me buy the new moon milling
WGP: Our stock parts are fine (Bud Orr circa 1995 when the stock parts did suck)
Smart Parts: We patented your mom
bruizer: How can this gun suck? Look who's holding it
Gecko

[Paintballer86]

That IS a great motto/ slogan.

[InfinatyBPS]

WGP: Ooooo isn't that pretty and scary? Ooops... Thats gonna cost me.
WDP: Everything from Europe deserves to be charged $1000 more for.
BE: Trying our hardest to make it cheaper for you... What you thought we meant the price?
Dye: Anything with our name on it deserves to be $50 more.
Shocker: Size does matter.

[PsychoMag]

WGP: "Where working on your gun CAN be a full time job..."

WGP: "Got tools?"

WGP: "makers of a good pump gun"

WGP: "Where reliability comes in a close 42nd"

WGP: "what?...huh?...you mean it's supposed to work all the time?"

WGP: "WGP where even third world countries make better front pneumatics than we do"

WGP: "Support your local airsmith, buy a cocker"

Shocker: "15lb SCUBA recommended"

AGD: "No Tools Required" :)

AGD: "The new EMAG...No Bateries Required" :)

WDP: "The Angel...now includes Satellite link up, and LO-Jack"

[LCDmag1]

Be:" Our paint breaks before it leaves the barrel so you don't have to worry about it not breaking on the other players"
Be:"Bore sizes....our paint has varied bore sizes all in one pack for your convinance"

[slayer]

BE = "Broken Everytime"
BE = "Buying Everyone"
BE "Our guns shoot around trees (but not intentionally)"

SP: "In the box thinking"
SP: "Spiral porting really works" ME: thank god it doesn't otherwise my balls would fly all over the place.

MY Question: why in the world does and electro need timing, shouldn't the electronics take care of that.

[mag_pbg]

UNCLE WDP WANTS YOU TO SPEND MORE!!!!!!

[ReTroMagBoy]

BE- "Supplying vandalism with new tools since 1990!"

AGD- "Its the user thats chopping the paint, we promise!" ;)

WGP- "Whats wrong? You actually want to play with
our guns??"

WDP- "Our anodizing is THE thinnest in paintball!!"

Kingman- "World Record outta-the-box chrono speed... 956fps!!"

Smart Parts- "Making customers suffer for 4 years!"

Dye- "Stupid freak system....."

[Miscue]

Originally posted by ReTroMagBoy


Kingman- "World Record outta-the-box chrono speed... 956fps!!"



Ha! Pretty good. :)

[CoFFeY[NiTrO]]

WGP - We are here so you will spend more money fixing your gun that upgrading it.
BE - Quantity first - Quality last
Note : I still like them.:D

[zvanut]

ANS people~ our mag parts stink, so buy a cocker

[zvanut]

Proball- might as well be shooting rocks, they r cheaper.

Tippmann- Where being able to get run over by a car IS half the battleIS

[zvanut]

Proball- might as well be shooting rocks, they r cheaper.

Tippmann- Where being able to get run over by a car IS half the battle

[kenshinkandon]

"Worr Games Products" We guarantee that all your air goes down the barrel whether you pull the trigger or not

[AkaEnder]

heh, proball should be: "proball - allowing players to bunker themselves since 1994" - "we guarntee a better bounce, or your money back""

[zvanut]

UP

[Micromag5371]

oh well.
Kingman- we learn from our mistakes
Bob long- how do you spell quality control?
WGP- For the mechanically inclined
matrix- For best results use a Dual ASA with 2 114/4500's
WDP-shiney, spiffy, $1200...and you still can be eliminated
Tribal- If you cant get your gun to work, don't look to us. we built it.

JT- our dirtbike racing technology inspires us
Tippmann- built like a truck, works like a dead battery
BE-Not a toy, but rather a deadly piece of equipment(like a plastic butter knife)

ANS- because we said so.our aftermarket is great, thats why your not using our products.

bruizer- when you finish upgrading, you will be able to compete with spyders.

PTP-HUSH! your gun works fine...THERE is NO PROBLEMS in your gun....WE WILL REPLACE IT FOR free...you pay the $95 S&H fee

ICE paintball- we look up to the major manufacturers....WAYY UPP

[kenshinkandon]

Autococker- batteries not required
Emag- batteries optional

[zvanut]

UP!!!!

[Cro§§ƒire]

Mags= Whats that? Your battery went dead :D

[Paintball_Foo]

ak, quit raggin on shocker they arn't made to be pretty :) just to work...Buy a 68ci Co2... last you as much as a 114 N tank on your RT... hehe

[FooTemps]

DAMN...You guys are good. Took all the ones I was thinking of. We need to find more to diss...how about PMI?

edit:
ANGEL: GOT CASH?

[Dubstar112]

Smart parts: Shoes not included
... although i do like the shocker...

AGD: The last gun you'll need(PERIOD)

WGP: More elves for the money!

WDP:If we made it in the US, it could be cheaper

... all of these companies are good no matter what!

[MajorDamage]

B.E. If quality always shoot straight then what does that mean for us...Oh, I see...*Cries*...*Spirits get uplifted* Lets make something out of plastic!

OR!

B.E. we dont make no not good guns, we make things cheaper! We recycle though! Our guns are made from old plastic milk jugs, and if we have to use metal, we use old pop cans, and our paint is not good, and wal-mart loves us, and Yeah!

Lol, I know this isnt really funny, but its the truth! lol. Dont hate me because im beautiful...

ENDO!

[st6212]

Some private jokes with my buddies :)

WDP: "bzzzt...General Protection Fault"

SP: "Shocker in a size 8 please"

AGD: "Pull the trigger our way, or it's NO way!"

WGP: "So what's that? Your third lense now?"

[shartley]

Cocker... for those who like to tinker.
E-Mag... for those who don't want to HAVE to.
<hr>
Cocker... Great Marker for adding after-market parts to.
E-Mag... Great Marker for not NEEDING after-market parts.
<hr>
E-Mag... How much do you want to pay for your Marker?
Cocker... How much do you want to pay for your Upgrades?
<hr>
Question: Why does the name Cocker remind me of a chicken?
<hr>
E-MAGnificent
<hr>
B.E. (Be Everywhere)
<hr>
For those who need the extra help, call on an ANGEL. For those who need true power and reliability, call on a GOD. E-Mag
<hr>
All things being equal... heck, all things are NOT equal! E-Mag
<hr>
Which is more reliable in YOUR game? Your mouth or your Marker? E-Mag What great players prefer to shoot.
<hr>
(NOTE: these are all in good fun. I am under the belief that it is not so important WHAT you shoot, as long as you DO shoot.)

[a person]

BE:We Suck And Thats It
WDP:Shiny. Over Priced. Can Give You Weather Reports Anyplace In The World, At Anytime, In 2002, The Year After That....
DYE:We Give Overpriced A New Meaning
WGP:We Shoot Farther, Somehow
Kingman:We Are BrassEagle, Just We Use Aluminum
BE:We Release Products Before Tesing And Then Record The Results
Smart Parts:Patent. Patent. Patent. What Do We Make Again?
Tippmann:We Build Things Like Tanks: Big, Heavy, and You Can Take It To War
AGD:We Actually Care
ACI:We Are Yet Another Version of BrassEagle
JT: Downgrading Our Products Since The Brass Eagle Era
VL:HALO, Oh Crap....
HALO:GoodBye VL....
Bob Long: We Try To Improve on Ideas and Products, But We Make Them Worse and Pretty
ANS:The Brass Eagle of Upgrades for Your Gun
KAPP:Overpriced Drop Forwards, And A Whole Lot More
CP:We Make Shiny Things Too, Yet They Serve a Purpose Well At a Reasonable Price

I need to get out more.

[Starfire]

AGD- Because being different is good.... 16bps no chopping never need to do a damn thing to good....

[Riot[Z-Grip]]

WGP: "If you love to tinker, then you to can have a $350 paperweight."
BE: "Plastic--the other maker substance."
BE: "We'll by your cat, refrigerator, and shoes, if it will put one more of OUR guns in SOMEONE'S hands.
WDP:"If you thought your Porche was fast...."
JT: "When you just have to follow the crowd."
DYE: "Why not? All the pros are doing it."
Kingman: "Think of us like paintball's Microsoft."
Tippmann: "Because die-cast is everyone's first choice."
AGD: "Because videos from 1991 are still usefull."

[gmag]

Shartley and Riot.....HILARIOUS!!! LOL!

Indian Creek Designs: Yes, the Alleycat and the Thundercat are the same EXACT markers.

Airgun Designs: The only company that gives away free powerfeed plugs.

Dye: Professionals only.

Tippman: We suck.

WDP: Need help doing your math homework?

[keebler]

agd: never has a tube done so much

[J]

Smart parts (Impulse - Shocker): "One thread fits all (of the same gun). OR
Smart parts: "proving you CAN make a shoebox into a paintball gun"


Viewloader: "The Evalution was Brass Eagle's idea, we swear"
32 degrees : "Hey, we haven't copied that yet"
WGP: "It HAS to be good if it cost this much"
the Stingray: "And they said we needed threads"
BE: "We survived by clinging on (and bring down) successful companies"
Kingmann: "Our guns need more holes in them"

[FDB1]

Be:"Bore sizes....our paint has varied bore sizes all in one pack for your convinance"

lol! that is great!

[Bartleby]

WGP - "good from far, but far from good"
Kingman - "no, i'm sorry, we don't have ball breaks, we just have satchel charges that detonate in your chamber"
Angel - "we understand the need for compensation"
E-Mag - "the only gun with a right to an ego"
AGD - "Having trouble? Send your gun in and we'll replace everything including power tube, safety, trigger, regulator, all orings, and spaces at no charge. And ontop of that we'll throw in a few power feed plugs. ENJOY!"
Retro Valve - "get a warpfeed"
Warpfeed - "gravity just isn't fast enough"
PMI - "It's PMI not PMS damnit!!"
Tippman - "What? No we don't understand the flatline, we just know it works."
Challenge Park Extreme - "we pride ourselves on our cheesy movie-making abilities"
Me - "for your personal enjoyment"

[MajorDamage]

OK! I thought of more today!

AGD--We make reliable guns, and have great Tech Support.
WGP--Our guns are good after you upgrade them.
WDP--Our guns are expensive and electronic.
Smart Parts--We don't have very good tech support, and we make electronic guns.
Toxic Toyz--We are out of business.
Kingman--We make entry level markers, and have weird bottomline. We bought out Raven.
Tippmann--We make reliable entry level guns, with good tech support.
Brass Eagle--We make the Talon, Stingray, and other popular markers. We also bought out JT and Veiwloader.

LOL! I AM <I>SO</I> humorous!

ENDO!

[theraidenproject]

AGD: making back-up guns obselete since (whenever AGD started)

[dansim]

now the dye "stupid freek...."now that was funny
anyway

Agd- yeah its ugly but it makes a really cool clink,clink sound
wgp- well okay we found out how triggers are made they(whispering)whats that word again(talking) they pivot yeah pivot whatever that is
wdp- hey all you that have the pre lcd gun screw you
aci- well what if we make it shiny?
32* what if we add some stickers? howbout a hole or 2? hey now thats origanal
tippman- no you still cant buy the hellhound
cci- um were still in bussiness guys you know we sell guns and stuff
kigman- because theres never enough look alike markers made buy the same company oh and dont you love our offset pistol screw holes?

um thats all for now

[pito189]

WDP: "The Angel...now includes Satellite link up, and LO-Jack" [/B][/QUOTE]

Thats a good one.

The Angel...now with Windows XP standard.

[MJS1214]

tippman-why buy a cane AND painball gun?
tippman-we have a ATV with a paintball gun on it so there!
tippman-with a flatline barrel,the ball will go around the world and hit you in the back!
tippman-our guns shoot balls that can curve around a tree*
tippman-piss us off and well make another pointless add-on to the 98 custom!
WGP-ELVES RULE!
Boo Yaah-we make you spyder an angel minus the performance!
JAVA-we make spyders and sell them for an extra 20 dollars!
AGD-we made a tube with a grip frame actually WORK
WDP-we add a tv to your tank and a playstation2 to your gun




*that happened to me 1 time...
and no i actually DO like tippman they are just vulnerable!

[klb311]

WDP: Angels are better than Emags because, ummm, they like, cost more and stuff

AGD: If you can't see him popping up behind the bunker and yet you get railed by him, then yes, he was using a warp

[e21bgl]

:D :D :D :D :D

[mykroft]

Eclipse; We make cockers not suck

WGP: We make fancy pumps
WGP: They work, just DFWI

Kingman: The Hyundai of the Paintball industry, Cheap Junk from the Far East.

Shocktech: Because Danny Love Says So
Shocktech: Danny Love's Cool, so buy his engineering samples.

ANS: Worse than Stock, Guaranteed.

KAPP: Prettier Than Stock, Guaranteed

WDP: 1 Case, 0 Kills
WDP: $2000 and what warantee?

Smart Parts: 'Cause Everyone needs a bigger bottle

ICD: 1/2 the Price, 2x The performance of your average Angel

MacDev: Make your bushy feel like an Angel too.

Crossfire: Making presets cool since 2000

AGD: We can afford to have gold plated warrantee, our guns don't break anyways.

DYE: It's cooler because the Ironmen use it, Really.

PTP: Breaking good designs since 1993

[absocountry2]

I think the best so far is the Kingman-Crap with a K

PMI- Pretty Much Insignificant

[Manuel_FZR]

Hey ... that´s really funny! :D:D
My favourite: WGP= Better distance and accuracy thru use of elves.

[MJS1214]

Originally posted by MJS1214
tippman-why buy a cane AND painball gun?
tippman-we have a ATV with a paintball gun on it so there!
tippman-with a flatline barrel,the ball will go around the world and hit you in the back!
tippman-our guns shoot balls that can curve around a tree*
tippman-piss us off and well make another pointless add-on to the 98 custom!
WGP-ELVES RULE!
Boo Yaah-we make you spyder an angel minus the performance!
JAVA-we make spyders and sell them for an extra 20 dollars!
AGD-we made a tube with a grip frame actually WORK
WDP-we add a tv to your tank and a playstation2 to your gun



*that happened to me 1 time...
and no i actually DO like tippman they are just vulnerable!

i like the above...and:We can afford to have gold plated warrantee, our guns don't break anyways.

[Bartleby]

you're not getting away with that one.

MJS1214 QUOTED HIMSELF

hee hee hee

[mykroft]

PMI: We do Blowbacks right!
PMI: Spyders that Work.

Tippmann: Bulletproof, Literally

AKALMP: Overpriced and under-pressurized

Sandridge: Angel Performance, Cocker reliability, the worst of both worlds.

Zap:Making Kingman look good

Palmer: Overpriced, Overengineered, overweight, and underperforming.

BE: We are Borg, prepare to be assimilated

Diablo: Guns with Gremlins

[MicrOMag]

Lol that Sandridge one is funny:p

[Vegeta]

Kingman Java= "Paint it purple and sell it for 20 dollars more!"

Bushmaster= "'Cuase everyone wants to live in the bush!" <i like that one

BE= "Supplying gangs, poor people, and crackheads for over 6 years."

I cant say anything bad about tippmann... i own a 98. Never had any problems with it in 2 years. and about the custom... i wish i had one. No sending to the company to put in your RT or hacksawing trigger guards.. it really was a good idea they came out with it. And they dont charge that much more for htem.. maybe 25 dollars.

[_MaD_]

J&J - Better barrels through frying pan technology!
Brass Eagle - All your paintball gear are belong to us!
WDP - Paintball gun, pager, cell phone and now featuring wireless web access!
Smart Parts - You'll Freak when you see how much it costs!

[Bartleby]

"BE: We are Borg, prepare to be assimilated "

one of the best one's i've seen yet :D

[Drizit]

Tippmann RT: And you thought the Angel was spray and pry.
Tippmann: Because you never know when you will need a club in a paintball game.
Tippmann: What do you mean a switch for full auto or nothing is a bad idea?
Tippmann: Go ahead. just try and cross thread this.
ProTeam: Tubes? we don't need no stinking tubes.
ProTeam: We don't make the markers you already own, we make them smaller.
WGP: taking a good idea and making it way more complicated then it has to be.
WDP: Because the trigger shouldn't have to move for the gun to fire.
Cobra Angle: 1 colour anodizing and a trigger job you could do in 15 minutes is worth an extra $1000 right?
AGD: because everyone should have a gun designed by a rocket scientist.

ok it's late and I don't think I can come up with anymore right now.

[nutz]

WDP: 1$ gun, 999$ shiping

[nutz]

o just thought of this one...
WGP- the gun works untill you gas it up.
Proball- breaks on impact... of the bolt that is.
Diablo- paintballs hurt... lets make them hurt more!
Kingman- purple paint is better than grey!!!

[Vegeta]

Tippmann - We make large threaded barrels for really, really, fat fingered people that can't screw in a 20 turn spyder barrel.

Viper - We use 1/4 turn lock-in barrels for really, really, dumbasses.

Tippmann Flatline - New innovation - turn the gun sideways and shoot around trees.

Airstar Super Nova - Now Comes in white! (note: metal detector to find gun after you drop it in the snow not included)

Angel WDP - Now comes with OnStar* System!

"I just took my mag apart last night"
"Oh.. did that take long?"
"No.. but it took me 5 hours trying to fiqure how to put it back together."

[n1mr0d]

Originally posted by Vegeta

Viper - We use 1/4 turn lock-in barrels for really, really, dumbasses.

"I just took my mag apart last night"
"Oh.. did that take long?"
"No.. but it took me 5 hours trying to fiqure how to put it back together."


errr......AGD guns use the quarter turn and lock barrels, does that make us dumasses?....

and that joke about the mags is like not funny or true. it takes me 20 seconds to go from assembled to body, body rail, trigger frame, and valve.

[pbsj]

WDP "Because regular maintenance should cost 400 dollars"
WGP "Building Power forearms since 1993 "
SP "With turbo even a trained monkey can be your fatback"
Tribal "So ugly they could be a modern art masterpiece"
Tippman "Because everyone needs an entrenching tool"
Bruiser "Great Jugs err I mean Guns..."

[mac2k4]

hey n1mr0d none of it is true there justa jokin around. The reason ya can take it apart so quick is cause its only held by 1 screw

[n1mr0d]

Originally posted by mac2k4
hey n1mr0d none of it is true there justa jokin around. The reason ya can take it apart so quick is cause its only held by 1 screw

heh gotcha

[deded]

warpig: if you can't find it here, you most likely have brain damage

pigtv: look at all the angels!

brass eagle: why use metal when plastic is so much cheaper?

diablo: our commercials suck ***

WDP: buy our stuff so we can pay our web designers!

dye: buy our stuff so we can pay *our* web designers!

AGD: we only fix 'em for free because they never break

Warp Feed: its time to buy more paint

JT: Buy our $130 goggles and well throw in a fan for free!

[NikeMann]

BE - "you mean it's NOT suppose to break in the barrel?"

AGD - "cuz the gun has to work to be able to use it"

WDP - "price means everything"

WGP - "the more moving parts, the cooler it is"

Kingman - "add a new part to an old gun, and you have a whole different gun."

ICD - "send it in, we'll MAKE it work"

SP - "we make good barrels, as for the guns..."

DYE - "three letters can change a price"

Bob Long - "of course I ate paint chips"

32* - "what's a patent?"

KAPP - "it's so purdy..."

Tippmann - "suppose to be used in war, not in play"

Ricochet - "weed whacker technology"

ZAP - "leave us alone, we know we suck"

Diablo - "posessed"

J&J - "we know ceramic breaks"

JT - "making you stick out when you want to hide"

Warp Feed - "peek-a-boo"

VL - "dont you think the egg was original?"

[DiRTyBuNNy]

this is my favorite thread of all time...it always makes me crack up...

[ThePatriot]

I must agree...DO NOT LET THIS THREAD DIE

[Aliens-8-MyDad]

Man this is soo funny! I loved these mostly

Tippman- can be used in hand to hand combat
and this one

wgp "airsmith not included"
also...

Angel: Free R2D2 included in every trigger frame.

kingman: we spell crap with a k

Shocker: "15lb SCUBA recommended"

WDP: "The Angel...now includes Satellite link up, and LO-Jack"

Be:"Bore sizes....our paint has varied bore sizes all in one pack for your convinance"

Kingman- "World Record outta-the-box chrono speed... 956fps!!"

Dye- "Stupid freak system....."

AGD: "Because videos from 1991 are still usefull."

[ChrisRT]

WDP: Got Money?
WGP: Cocked and ready to be fixed
BE: You've been assimilated
Bruizer: instead of R&D we use T&A

[davidb]

Smart Parts: We've made more new physics laws than there ever were tax laws.
Smart Parts Runner Up: Just because Tom Kay can't understand it doesn't mean the Magic Box doesn't work.
Smart Parts Special Mention: Play at a field where gun hits don't count and you WILL rule the day.

AGD: We're those guys who back up our claims.
AGD Runner Up: We'll never go out of business. If we ever need easy money we'll just add a five buck charge for an unlimited warranty.
AGD Special Mention: If we ever get ahold of that fairy dust, WGP and SP won't know what hit'em.

WGP fans: Ya see, it has to do with the way the valving is discomunimlated from the pump. The cross-postularation of hoses and closed-boltedness makes for an increase in the air-to-air capabilities of the... See, I knew you wouldn't understand this.

WDP: No, technically it won't outperform other electros, but it does have more buttons, and also a thermometer. Do other guns have thermometers? Of course not, because they don't have the same commitment as WDP does to have your paintball gun replace everything you own.
WDP Product Update: In the WDP tradition of giving you the bare necessities, (i.e. a thermometer for telling you whether it's hot or cold) we give to you the 2002 Angel with VSD, or Vital Sign Detection, to tell you whether or not you're still living.

DYE: Overpriced is an ancient Attic Greek word for "shiny", or "superior". That's what people mean when they say that.

Kingman: I think AGD is probably going to go under pretty soon. Why? Come on, it's been like a week since they came out with a new gun.

Zap: Sounds better than Brass Eagle Canada, doesn't it?

Brass Eagle: #1 ever since newbies stopped asking the vets for advice.
Brass Eagle Runner Up: Plastic Makes Perfect.

[bornl33t]

Originally posted by davidb


Kingman: I think AGD is probably going to go under pretty soon. Why? Come on, it's been like a week since they came out with a new gun. [/B]

lmao THAT's awsome! where did this thread come from?

[ThePatriot]

This one might have been said but i got one... WGP- we break your gun so you dont have to....

[Miscue]

DYE: Award-winning 5-Star Marketing Department.
WGP: The gun you get to fix all week. (not my quote :) )
ANS: Just sound out our name and you'll figure out where our parts come from.
WDP: Introducing Love Juice - Not for oral contact.
SPPLAT: "Everybody vs. Shatner!"
Pevs: Come pet our goat. :)

[FDB1]

smart parts- yeah we're cool because our guns have stock barrels with lots of holes in them, that definately means more accuracy and range.

brass eagle- and you thought autocockers werent reliable.

wdp- 200 $ board, 150 $ anno, 400 $ milling, and 300 $ shipping. dang were good.

kingman- the guns are homemade but at least we got lots of pretty ones

zap- no-one knows why we arent out of bussiness

jt- sponsor as many people as we can!!! HAHAHA the whole world will be wearing jt masks within a matter of months HAHHAHAHAH!!!

agd- under rated tubes!!!

aci- hey bulldogs are good because they have gauges on them dont be dissin up on bulldogs

[omni]

"ANS: Just sound out our name and you'll figure out where our parts come from."



LOL !!!!!!!!!

[davidb]

up

[Cliffio]

your upping a post in the main forum, wow
never seen that
maybe you could of at least thought of somehting to put!!

[AGNH]

Dye > Got Money ?

Kingmann > Got the New Gun of the Week ?

J&J > Got Dye over a barrel !

PTP > Got Anything not on BackOrder ?

Shocker > Got Rain ?

WDP > Got E-Mail, Free HBO, and a Free Trip
to Europe with that Marker ?

Armson > Got any ideas how to sell these barrels ?

ADCO > Got any better ideas ?

JT > Got anymore of those SunGlasses ?

Tippmann > Got Dynomite ? Cause nothing else will
destroy our guns.

AGD > Got Warp with that E-Mag ?

WGP > Got Timing ?

Brass Eagle > Got WalMart ?

Smart Parts > Got any more Higher Freakin Prices ?

Bruzier > Got Girls with those guns ?

APP > Got any more great ideas like the Wrapper ?

32D > Got any of your own ideas ?

PMI > Got a Fish Tank with that Piranha ?

IAO > Got Zapped ?

Redz > Got a Neoprene Gun yet ?

[dansim]

hehe im subscibed to this for some reason

[Hexis]

Kingman: Kuality with a capital "K"!

[MagNumPI]

Brass Eagle: The paint smells like maggots cause it is made from 100% pure maggot.

Brass Eagle: "Professional paintball equipment" everyone wants to be a pro.. we will sell more of this crap this way..

WGP: What else can we put on this thing to make it look cooler while still giving off more reliability.
WGP: We are better cause we have a moving thingy on our gun!

Kingman: I just put white-out on my spyder shutter, now it's a Blizzard Shutter Extreme 2k2
Kingman: Trust me , Java is a new "Hype" word that will sell more guns at higher prices.. Java Blizzard Shutter Extreme 2k2.. see doesn't it just flow?

AGD: YES YES our guns have stayed the same for god know how long.. hmmmm wonder why this is??

AGD: Who cares that you got new flashy pneumatics, know ones gonna see em while you fiddling with it.

WDP: The New MICROSOFT ANGEL XP..... uh no... "Your angel has just performed an illegal operation and will now shut down.."

SP: "I bet you you can't make an ugly gun." SP tech:"OH YEAH, YOUR ON!"

[Cliffio]

Average AO Member-"I Brag On Mags And Diss Everything Else Even Tho I Havnt Shot It"

Average AO member-"I Love Camo"

dorks, just figured if you all can flame my gun i can flame you, hope you like apples, '
cause im TALKIN ABOUT YOU! how you like them apples

hehe, all in good fun
just realize some people are gonna take offence, but also when you mess with peoples guns alot of times they dont like it

just keep that in mind
your not unflameable

see i just made up a word too!

[MagNumPI]

Most of us have (i have) owned or played with every gun I mentioned.. and in the end I stuck with mag..

You do have a point , flame and you will be burnt..


but we don't need to fight.. cause it's wrong and thats not what paintball is now is it!!


Go grab your marker and play , reguardless of what it is!

[Cliffio]

im not flaming anyone, i just think that some of these people will take offence, even tho they can dish it out, they just cant take it, either way im jsut havin fun, and i dont mean anything by it, but im sure i will get flamed, Oh well:)

im glad you see my point tho, i am sure other will too

later
Cliff

[845]

PMI: "Striving towards the future with the first paintball gun that doubles as a frag grenade"

[AngelBoy]

One of the best has been: Dye - stupid freak system....

and WDP - Sex sells!

HAHAHA

WGP - Ya see, that thing that pops back isnt a bolt either, its a hand that spanks the elf and makes it jump...

WGP - Well, no, it doesnt do anything... NO, its not an elf cage!

WDP - We don't make LEDs anymore, because we cant live without a thermomiter

[Cliffio]

Kingman-"Em1, The best thing we could think of"

Spart Parts-"Who needs a nine volt?"

Avalanche "Hey We've Got Rocky"

Smart Parts- "Hey, we make a cocker too"

Slam Ball "who needs game with balls like these"

[ZeezNutz]

aci: "takes less tools then a mag just bang the f4 against a tree a few times and everything will instantly work perfectly"


sad thing is it acctually worked for a friend of mine. never had a problem with it since :D

[Cliffio]

Tribal "Just Try And Find Us"

Tippmann "Built For A Scope"

[boggerman]

WGP:"By the time you finish upgrading your marker, you can make a backup from all the spare parts. That's good, 'cause you're gonna need it!"

[Cliffio]

AGD "Because everyone need a good blender"
JT "Because Chromeplusion Looks Good On Anything"

[Cliffio]

FreeFlow "Hey Goats work just as well"

[ZeezNutz]

ahahaha

[Drizit]

Matrix: and you thought a Shocker could use gas.

Flatline: the only way to shoot farther (except elves that is)

[Stinger]

bruizer-believe me, its not just the gun that sucks
shocker-NO THERE AREN'T SHOES INSIDE
wdp-you can so buy skill
wgp-our guns disasemble for you

[I-hate-school]

PJ: "Because looking like a super hero doesnt make u a target!" (Reffering to new super hero jersey line)

32º: "What Dont we make?"

Tippman: "Because you need a forgrip...No? ... well you get one anyways."

WGP: "We make the autococker, everyone else makes the parts."

WGP: "Because aftermarket companys need us."

Bob Long: "Does any1 own our products?"

Kingman: "lets add a gas through grip and a site rail and call it a shutter."

BE: "Because Walmart needs us."

DYE: "lets mill Dye into it and charge 40$ more."

WDP: "We are secretly owned by Bill Gates."

[Bartleby]

not so secret anymore is it?

[Stinger]

32*-our only purpose is to copy jt

[845]

AirStar: Noo! That Doesn't Go There!!!!

[vf-xx]

WDP - new for 2002 synthetic voice alarms "I can't let you do that Dave...."

[beam]

Originally posted by 845
AirStar: Noo! That Doesn't Go There!!!!

BWAAAHAHAHAHA!

props to 845!

AirStar: "I'll be there in a second guys....I just need to chr ***BLAM***"

[Bartleby]

WDP - new for 2002 synthetic voice alarms "I can't let you do that Dave...."

that is the funniest thing i've seen on here. :D

[Paintball_Foo]

.

[ZeezNutz]

sorry couldnt let that ^ be the last post on this thread

[DA_DMX]

agd-"if you want to make your hopper touch the moon get our vert feed"
agd-"and they said you couldn't make a paintball gun work like a flamethrower"
wdp-"ours gun may not work but with what other gun can you call your mom for help in the mittle of a match"
Shockers-"like guns that have a million o-ring we got you covered"
Matrix-"we are a good gun when we work...seriously"

[gmag]

WDP: Causing jealousy since whenever.....

[845]

E-mag: This gun ain't no angel

[Vegeta]

Tippmann: "Hacksaw not included"
Tippmann: "Built like a tank, indestructible, big, and heavy."
Airstar: "Whoops. Hey we tried."
Voodoo Paintball: "'Cuase veryone needs a 300 paint-mine"
BE (new line of guns): We took 1 gun and made it into four! (Kingman here we come!)"

I can't understand BE. THey make hte Genisis, Surge, Revelation, Surge DF.. all those.. and htey are ALL THE SAME GUN. Just diffrent colors with some minor add ons. And hte call their things htat come stock "custom". I was reading APG and in hte Marker's Description it said it had a "Custom" trigger frame... uh... it came wit hthe gun... nothing special about it.. its stock. Same with the paint/ano job.. they called it "Custom".. they are all like that.. its stock. Thats like.. false advertising.

[Bartleby]

but all companies do that. the trick is what the item is custom to. like the color could be cutomized to the factory. the trigger frame could be customized to the gun (knowing the inconsistency of BE)

[BTAutoMag]

ACI (Phat barrel) "How big are your balls? Beacuse in paintball, SIZING does matter."
Then later in the add
"ACI's 'PHAT' barrel system keeps your load from blowing prematurely or dribbling out of the tip..."
i love this add, i even had to call my best friend at 9:00 at night to read him this

[BTAutoMag]

Originally posted by deded
AGD: we only fix 'em for free because they never break

this SHOULD be an AGD motto

[845]

APG: Written by squids for newbies (I didnt make this up but it made a good point)

[BTAutoMag]

DYE: I thought all witches rode Boomsticks.
BE: If it breaks, it's not our problem, you bought it.
WDP: because more moving parts means more accuracy
AGD:Elves? We don't need no stinkin' elves.
Angel: because if you know the temp. inside your gun your game will improve.
System-X: we make the expensive more pricey

[gmag]

Whatever happened to this going historic? :)

[DiRTyBuNNy]

just thought i'd throw this one back up because it should be a classic..

[FooTemps]

Custom Products: We actually have a 4 foot *******! OOPS, we mean barrels.

[dorksquad]

found this a while ago
Your marker determines your life. READ!
I posted something similar to this on the PBall City board a while back and
thought I'd post it here too. It's simply a joke. It represents my
opinions(and mayby yours too) so don't take any of it seriously.


INSTRUCTIONS: FIND YOUR MARKER AND READ THE DESCRIPTION OF WHAT TYPE FO
PERSON YOU ARE.



-PGP:I'm a meat and potatoes person
-P68:I eat my meat and potatoes with a 12 inch fork
-Phantom:Simplicity is my middle name
-Maverick/Trracer:I'm all skill
-Spyder:I think I'm cool
-M98:I am cool
-Model 83:I wish I was cool
-Talon:I'm in the 4th grade
-Raptor:I'm in the 4th grade and get an allowance
-Rainmaker:I'm in the 5th grade and get have rich parents
-Nelspot007:Back in my day....
-Automag:I like to go 4 wheeling in my jeep
-Autococker:I was born with a screw driver in my hand
-Dark Cocker:I was born with a multicolored screwdriver set.
-Sandridge F5:I was born with a DeWalt cordless drill
-Shocker:I know what I'm doing
-Impulse:I know what I'm doing and I'm still in highschool
-Vision Impulse:I know what I'm doing but know too much
-Defiant:I know vaguely whats going on but still I'm confused
-Timmy:I think I'm Bob Long
-Bushmaster 2000:I replaced skill with paint
-Angel:I play in national Tournaments
-Dark Angel:I have a small penis
-Revenge2:I buy fake stuff and say it's real
-Mini-mag:I live in a one room apartment
-Micro-mag:I share a one room apartment
-E-mag: I sold my soul to Satan for a case of paint
-Evolution Autococker:I love British life
-Piranha:I don't care about labels

Any gun annodized:You can't put me in a cage
Any gun painted:I put small animals in cages
Any gun w/ a 16"+ barrel:Quiet, Charlie will hear us
Any gun w/ a double trigger:I can still give peeps the bird
Any gun w/out a foregrip: The name's Bond, James Bond
Any gun w/ a pump:I'm sick of masturbating

[wyn1370]

Kapp - um ...yeah ...paintball parts, hey look isn't that Lisa Harvey

[FooTemps]

Here's a nice logo for the angel.

[HoppysMag]

BE : Warning leaving outside on sunny day may cause melting.
WGP: Worlds largest elf suplyer.... What we make PAINTBALL guns??
Kingman: Lots of variastions.... Same crappy gun.
Angel: Its got to be the best. Why else would i have payed 2000 dollars for it??

[Thor the Mighty]

b.e.-we ran out of brass so we used plastic

[liigod]

guns n roses - welcome to the jungle - worst song
ptp - jungle night anno - wost anno ever
comic book man - worst eppisode ever
sony laptops - firewire on a 333mhz pII laptop, yer firewire camera is guna be faster than yer laptop, but we make those so we can sell em to you, and a palm pilot, and a tv, an speakers, and a reciver and a, well even a dog
brass eagle - liigod makes cool barrel plugs out of us

[Butterfingers]

WGP: "Physyics don't apply"

WGP: "We lead the pack in elf technology"

WDP: "Gun $500, Anno/Mill $200, Marketing $400, $100 import, the look on your face when you realize you bought an overpriced bushmaster PRICELESS."

WDP: "Extra circut boards not included"

WDP: "The worlds most expensive thermometer"

WDP: "High speed internet option for $29.95/mo."

ICD: "Yeah we sell angels"

Smart Parts: "Our marketing department won a pulitzer prize for best fiction."

Smart Parts: "We like drilling holes in long tubes"

Smart Parts: "We are secretly owned by the DOW chemical company."

Smart Parts: "Give us your money and we will tell you a story."

Smart Parts: "Tolerances? what are those"

Smart Parts: "Compressssed air truck reccomended"

Smart Parts: "We are no longer offering fire red anno so masons dont mistake our guns for bricks"

BE: "Ignorance is BLISS"

Diablo: "90% marketing 10% manufacturing"

Diablo: "Cause square paintballs fly better"

AKALMP: "Keepin those elves alive"

Tippmann: "Currently under govenment contract to produce the worlds strongest armor."

Tribal: "Free gun for anybody who can tell us who we are"

[aNtHrAx323]

Indian Creek: "Best shoeboxes in the sport of paintball."

And for an acronym...
AGD = "Ambiguously G..."
hehe, just kidding :D

[HoppysMag]

Tippman: makeing minature grenade launches in convient paint gun form!
Bob Long: Slap my name on sumthin and add 50$ to the price
AGD: Failure is not an option!
Angel: Bateries not optional!
WGP: you gotta pay extra for it to actualy work right.
32*: Patent shmatent.

Tom: YES! now im back on top! Diabolical Laugh!!!

ACI: Tracer, Maverick, Tracer, Maverick? Who wants to play 2 gun monty

[Butterfingers]

Introducing the new Shocker...

[aNtHrAx323]

lol!
They bear a striking resemblance :) . That's one hella expensive brick...

[HoppysMag]

"I can't understand BE. THey make hte Genisis, Surge, Revelation, Surge DF.. all those.. and htey are ALL THE SAME GUN. Just diffrent colors with some minor add ons. And hte call their things htat come stock "custom"."
Origanaly posted by Vegeta ( i couldnt get the Quote thingy to work)

Dont forget that the Genisis, Surge, Revelation, Surge DF are all BE Avengers.

[Vegeta]

AGD's New Superbolts - Hey, it's not our fualt some punk *** kid lied!

[gmag]

Action Pursuit Games: Because I like to read the same advertisement every month for two years.

[Toxic Dave]

Butter,

That's a matrix, but It is funny. Matri are more like Pavers than bricks, a bit rounder. But hey mine shoots good.
dave/ toxic

[gmag]

AO:Of course we're not test subjects...

[splat11756]

Brass eagle paint: BREAK IN YOUR BARREL, NOT ON YOUR target

[HoppysMag]

OA: World class guinne pigs. WE LOVE YA TOM!

[CRASHKING]

Originally posted by PsychoMag
WGP: WDP: "The Angel...now includes Satellite link up, and LO-Jack"

hey now lo-jack would be nice for all guns $500 and up

especially after hearing about all these e-mags being stolen.

[marc]

bad boyz toyz... our name was supose to be bad toyz for boyz, but bad boyz toyz looks better, and thats all that really matter.

[pito189]

WDP: No we are not copying Brass Eagle.

WDP: The IR3 anti chop eye, space age grip, cd burner, wait how did that get in there.

[Zumina]

AGD: Bringing you the finest "tube with a handle attached" technology.

[ThePatriot]

WHOA THIS THREAD IS STILL ALIVE??? This thread is oldschool..

[RoadDawg]

PMI "What we copied Kingman?"
Kingman "The only thing worth buying is... the body"
WDP "What do you mean you don't want to call your buddy while playing on the field?"
Brass Eagle "Huh! What?"

[epterry]

b.e. our guns put out a fine mist of paint for when you need to bunnker all 3 newbs behind that tire with 1 shot

angel guy makes a commint to the guy with the emag before walking on the field with him to have a 1 on 1 "dont you just love this new 2002 angel?" walking off the feild the emag guy says "what were you doing when i bunkerd you, or were you out of paint?" angel guy says "no I was checking my email." :D

[Rob @ DNR]

Worr Games: "Because moving part's look cool"
Brass Eagle: "Redefining the word crap"
National Paintball Supply: "Why lead when you can follow"
32 degrees: "We came, we saw, we copied"
Smart Parts: "If a box can work for Volvo..."
Smart Parts: "Support, We don't need no stinkin' customer support"
Smart Parts: "Grease up yer pig"
All American's: "What, me wipe?"
WDP: "25 useless modes of fire, and a whole lot more"
WDP: "Yeah, it has more features you'll never use..."
Redz: "Some assembly required"
Tippmann: "Any color you want, as long as it's black"
Kingman: "One design, 148 models"
Kingman: "Purple costs more"
AGD: "If it ain't broke, don't fix it"
Shocktech: "The bomb is a dud"
DYE: "At least boomstick sounds cool"
APG: "New issue, same articles"
Paintball 2 xtremes: "See National Paintball supply"
Facefull: "The JC Penny's catalog has nothing on us!"
Bob Long: "Ugly is good"
JT: "See kingman"
Diablo: "At least the box looks good"
Diablo: "Dimples add character..."

[BTAutoMag]

What happened to this going historic

[gmag]

Hahaha. Great stuff Rob!

[Havoc_online]

AGD: What can we say?...It's Divinity

WGP: Just don't sneeze on it, you'll break it.

WDP: Do NOT use in rain, it's not grounded.

[dave p]

WDP: "the type of skill only money can buy"
Pneuventures: "DoH!"

how come no one is ragging sheridan? im tryin but commin up dry.

[HoppysMag]

Sheridan: VM68 only gun that can stop a bullet and still work!.

Sheridan: PGP's bunkering your over priced gun since the late 80's

[Blazini]

WDP: Who Dares Pay?
WDP: Looking mighty fly all the way to the dead box.
WDP: So your card isn't maxxed yet? We proudly introduce our line of over priced tanks.
Kingman: No matter how many times you polish a turd,it's still just a piece of crap.
Kingman: Got cup seals?
Slatt Attack: Technically,Bud stole the idea first.
Spatt Attack: Check out our new auto....errr I mean revenge.
PGI Mayhem: No you can't have your money back.
Smart Parts: Screw you and thanks for shopping smart parts.
Smart Parts: Powered by Dow 33!!!!!
WGP: Trust us.....it shoots farther.
WGP: Thanks Glenn.
Sheridan: We're still here......I think?
AGD: We're not even sure where the gun ends and the barrel begins.
Diablo Matrix: Sucking more air than a Hoover.
Booyaa: Turning your aging paint clunker into an electro-junker.
Center Flag: Yea dude I love the creeper. Ohhh... you were talking tank regs.

[Cliffio]

AGD-Proud maker of the Not-So-Super Bolt.
AO-where we boast about how much better out website is.
... id do all the other fun companies but im sleepy

[FooTemps]

Originally posted by Cliffio
AGD-Proud maker of the Not-So-Super Bolt.

That one is great...
System-X= Plastic parts are better for your pb gun! WE SWEAR IT SO!

[Cliffio]

(got this from your sig, yeah its lame but oh well)

Yatta-yeah we make that

*i cant believe its not yatta*

[splat11756]

Brass eagle: leading the industry in recycled paint

[splat11756]

WDP: built in alarm clock

[orderofreason]

I thought i'd throw a couple into the mix

Diablo Matrix: nononono...more O rings make for a better gun!

Smart Parts: I dont' really care if your gun hasn't worked in 9 months, we dont' want to fix it. (nice eh...)

WDP: Yes we know Brass Eagle already made this grip. but we can charge more....

WDP: We could move to the states and make cheaper guns, but we like it in englad.

AGD: Impersonating a Cuisanart for almost 14 years

EMAG: Batteries not required!

Angel: Batteries required! (If you somehow manage to run down a 250,000 shot charge on the battery)

Kingman: One drill hole can change a price.

WGP: Leave it alone and it MIGHT work

AO: Hehe elves.

EM-1: Lets make an incredibly fast gun and throw a single trigger on it....

ICD: We almost feel like an angel

32 Degrees: If copying was the sincerest sign of flattery, we'd have our lips glued to everyones butt.

-----------------------------------------------------------

On another note. A lot of people have directed me to this website and a lot of people i know have seen this site. Trashing other guns beyond what is even good taste (the 1$ gun 999 shipping - study to be a machinist, you'll change your mind). So what if the angel IR3 has more features in it that you really need. I'm willing to bet that when the LCD came out that almost everyone here made fun of something like the lCD in the handle. What' the emag got again?

The 400$ shinier than yours made me almost die of laughter. Actually, most of these were hilarious. But i feel you guys are giving the IR3 and the LCD angels a little bit of a hard time. Do a ratio of mags to angels at any tournament and post it.

[BTAutoMag]

*WDP: now with a pentium 4 processor inside
*Cocker: -brand new autococker: 900$
----------Upgrades: 500$
----------Having someone teach you to use it: 100$
----------Finding out the hard way you should have bought a mag to begin with: Priceless
*B.E.: we know we'd be better at making blenders. (i hope someone gets this)

[Drizit]

order you finaly caved in and joined. i thought that would never happen. just couldn't stay away form this thread eh?

[recballer]

BE paint, breaks in your barrel not on your opponent.

(whoops nevermind splat beat me to it)

[Mav D MagMan]

BE: "We'd be great! (If we could just get those little paint thingies to fly out of the barrel without exploding)"

WGP: "The Autococker, make yours shinier than everyone else's. (Elves not included)"

Spyder: On most every blowback on the market: "Heeey that's OUR design"

Most every blowback designer on the market: "What's a clone? We just copied."

BE: "But, but, we waaant a monopoly!"

Lol, more to come, late all!

[Vertigo]

B.E.---> All your companys are belong to us.. not the greatest :)

[SSMercury]

Um, AGD, you said this would go to the historic forum eventually. Think 10 months or so is long enough? (just kept laughing and laughing in this thread)

[demonguy8]

AGD: stupid elves...

AGD: I dont believe in elves

AO: Offering $50,000 for proof of the existance of elves

Agd: We couldnt find our own elves, so we got Hello Kitty instead

Agd: WANTED- ELVES reward=$100/elf, DEAD or alive

[circa3182]

come on Tom

[FutureMagOwner]

"tippman- no you still cant buy the hellhound " lmao

j+j: "No our barrels arent made out of pottery! and no they wont shatter if you drop them damnit!"

[MagNumPI]

WDP: Now upload your highscores to the website and compete with players around the world.

WGP: Do people actually buy stock cockers anymore?

Kingman: The New Image, same as the e99 but with a new ingraving on the side that actually sais image, Ouuuuuuuuuu!


RAS inc: "I don't care about the little company, i deal with the big money producing companies. "
RAS inc: "I went to Tomahawk College for 2 years to be a welder, i think i know how to weld steel to aluminum"


note: The two RAS inc slogans are actuall exerpts from a conversation i had with one of the tech guys on very poor quality PF welding. NOTE, anyone with a RAS intruder, prolonged use of it with a full hopper will cause the PF to snap off at the welds.

[Gijim]

Its funny to see some get fussy that their marker is being exploited too much, but NO ONE is standing up for B.E.!!;) B.E. is by far the most ridiculed company in paintball, just something to ponder while trashing them,HEHE:rolleyes:

[Clare]

Agd: We couldnt find our own elves, so we got Hello Kitty instead

lol, that's cute

[MagmanLee]

AGD-Please, try to break em!
WGP-Screw Science!
WDP-Pay more for less!
WDP-Brag to your friends in the dead box!
BE-Because quailty doesn't matter, always.
ICD-Bushmaster, the other Angel.

[Wheelman]

Wow draged tis one from the bowels didn't ya.

Kingman- No we didn't make our guns better, we just made more of them.

Zap- yeah we made a marker..........sorry

Viewloader Evolution- Nobody can mess up twice....can they??

Tribal(remember them)- Our milling is like the shark, rub it the wrong way and you'll need stiches

Sheridan- Our semi's couldn't even make the cut at Walmart

AGD- Got it right the first time, again and again and again...

B.E.- Hey you bought a $15 gun, what did you expect?

Vulcan- We make Brass Eagle look good.

[CRog075]

Originally posted by Miscue
DYE: "$40 barrel, $60 laser-engraving."


funniest. one. ever.

[n00b]

Comeon post some more these are funny as ****.

[DiRTyBuNNy]

this thread is the best one EVER...hands down...

[paintslinger]

first off this thread is great. secondly i noticed u guys are leaving out good ole aci...hehehehe

aci- we make the f4...no not the airplane!
aci- our bulldogs dont attack your neighbors.
autococker- when u have to much time on your hands.
ir3- the cell fone of the future...:confused:

[the jackal]

Tippmann flatline-"shoots farther than a cocker and breaks less(paint on target)"

WGP-"why hasn't anyone bought the flatline autococker?"

Kingman-"We pioneered the spyder clone."

32 degrees-"Bringing you their products for less."

WDP-"Can your gun shoot half a case when a gust of wind hits it then tell you the direction of the wind as well as the windchill factor? Didn't think so!"

WDP-"Our gun is smarter than you."

BE-"Dude, those engineers at Kingman are like, so totally smart!"

[AllAmericanMag]

Smart Parts - "What customer service?"

(I love Shockers and Impys but SP has some problems...)

[AngelBoy]

AO - "The Official place to come and join hundreds of people all hit on ONE GIRL"

[einhander619]

OK, here it goes, I didn't take the time to read every post, so don't flame me if someone already said these.

Palmer: Two is better than one.

Smart Parts: pV=nRT?

Brass Eagle: Equipment maker of the year, chosen by Future Inmates of America(FIA)

WGP: We test our guns by cussing at them and throwing them.

ICD: Bushmaster, the most underrated gun, please believe us!

AKALMP: Makers of the best guns that nobody has.

WDP: 1 year cellular contract required. Activation fees apply. Addtional services such as email not included. Marker may not actually shoot paint.

JT: Still the best mask manufacturer, just 'cuz.

DYE: About our barrels... look over there! It's Keely Watson!!!

[ur4me2bunker]

because quality shoots straight always is great moto but if you have one of the old AGD black sweat shirts you will see it sure can't print straight!
It has the company logo with the famous moto, printed way off to the right and off center. We still laugh when we put those things on.
Are we sure that AGD can still use the term 'straight' in the moto with one of their teams called 'Pride'? Hmmmm.... I know those guys... and.....

[Cliffio]

Originally posted by AngelBoy
AO - "The Official place to come and join hundreds of people all hit on ONE GIRL"


bahahaha

good call


Cliff

[BTAutoMag]

Smart Parts: Our brick will beat your tube.

AGD: But after your brick beats our tube, our tube still works.

AGD: Forget to charge your battery? Dont worry, be happy.

[MagmanLee]

Kingman-Try our NEW flavor of the week!
WGP-Only markers with range extending elves.
Tippman-Indimidate your opponents with cannon sounding shots!

[SSMercury]

*cackles madly that this thread was resurrected...AND LIVES!*

[Cliffio]

anyone know why this isnt a classic yet?

[circa3182]

Lets all petition to make this a classic!

1) Mike Barrows

[HoppysMag]

circa, im in on that...



Steve Hopkins

[Cliffio]

Cliff LInders

[BTAutoMag]

Zac Arbuckle

[DiRTyBuNNy]

Dan Lathum

[FooTemps]

Alex Chuang

[DDC]

i have a tippman its okay but i want an automag

[nic m85]

I just read this entire thing and I say...............CLASSIC:)

[Wheelman]

Steve Lane

[Krazy Ivan]

Bruiser + KAPP: "The Best curves in the business!*"

* - We also sell paintball guns too.

Kingman - "Where you can buy a stock marker for $100 and put $50 into it to make it our $300 tournament marker!"

Raven - "We have the Raven chick.....buy our stuff"

[Python14]

Noah Borthen


WGP: Complicated enough to make NASA blush
WDP: English hookers cost money, your money!
AGD: Put your finger in it
Airtech: We got a deal on O-rings
BE: Making Doorstops since before you were born
DYE: So expensive you'll dye paying
CP: Making Dye look bad is too much fun
Proteam Products: Looking for customers
Palmers Pursuit Shop: Custom guns that you can't have
Smart Parts: Working hand in hand with C02 suppliers
Sheridan: Kick Brass!
Diablo paintballs: We sponsor everyone under the sun
Proball: What happened?
PBgear.com: Not what you ordered?
JT: Camo Jerseys for a speedball world
Viewloader: Slow and steady wins the race
Bruizer: When her "guns" will only sell
Kingman: 3 markers, a million names.
Kingman: When industry standards aren't enough
WDP: We only stop when it gets below 50
AGD: God probably uses an automag

[Krazy Ivan]

pbgear.com:"Browse our site for millions of pictures of things we had in stock!"

[DarkRipper]

Originally posted by Skyssx
You know the viewloader buy out was the two corporations... BE want's to buy name recognition, thats why they bought JT. Did you also know that the HALO is made by the designers of the revy?


No, I didn't know that. The old guys from VL own Odyssey now?

Wow.

Thanks

DR

[SSMercury]

SSMercury=Steven Schultz. Make it a historic moment in AO history when it was moved to the historic forum. :D

[Rob @ DNR]

Oh, this HAS to become a classic post... it gets better every time you read it.

You got my vote.

Rob Buntin
DNR Paintball

[vineas]

Originally posted by BTAutoMag
*WDP: now with a pentium 4 processor inside

Funny, on my bushy I have an AMD Athlon MP sticker :D

[ur4me2bunker]

Brass E cold do a take on AGD.

Brass Eagal, Beacause Quality is Never an Issue.
PMI- "Melts in Your Gun, Not on Their Hands."

[mykroft]

Mokal : great guns, too bad we can't spell.
PMI : Fixing Kingman's mistakes since 1996.
WGP : Building a worse Spyder (Seen the E-Ranger yet?)
AGD : No, We're still in business.
WDP : Sex Sells.
Kingman : Taking a bad design and making it worse.
ICD : If we can't win on features, we'll win on price.
Smart Parts : Low Pressure will save the earth, really.
DYE : People will pay more for anything.
AKALMP : Good idea's, bad pricing.
Palmer : Cockers with half the looks & twice the cost.

[Vegeta]

Smart Parts- "It didn't quite work for us.. but hey! It just might make YOU famous!"

Airstar (Nova) - "For the last time, NO the valve did not shoot THROUGH the player's head."

WGP- "Our stock markers aren't even stock anymore."

<b>"WDP, soon to merge with Dell"</b>

[Cliffio]

this thread, because it should never die

[Dayspring]

Marballizer- "If you're not playing with our balls, you shouldn't be playing."

[Mag89]

Smart Parts- Because our parts come with smart elves.

[Dayspring]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Do you blame us?




Originally posted by AngelBoy
AO - "The Official place to come and join hundreds of people all hit on ONE GIRL"

[magman007]

WELLLLL!!!!! With the spewing of stuff from WAS, i think it is time to ressurect this thread.

im going to start off with the one in LOADsm5´s sig

"PRoud Owner of the WAS turborev, my loader´s smarter than yours"

[HoppysMag]

WAS- "the new Turborev has AI, it learns your way of playing.The loader board even learns that it sucks!"

[angelKiller16]

Nick Morrow

Kingman: "Buy the new ______ (insert gun here) now"

WDP: "British cars cost 1,000's more, so should our guns"

SP (shocker): "Got Air?"

Kingman: "Nike make's their products in 3rd world countrie's too!"

edit: WGP: "pssssst..."

[SSMercury]

*moan* What have I done, what have I done by raising the thread from history....


*chuckle* Still funny...

[SSMercury]

You know, I find it funny that from the first reply onwards, this thread has been totally off the thread starter's topic.

[Coaster]

Palmer: Chances are will have already died before we are finished making your gun

WDP: Overclocking software included with every angel!

[314159]

smart parts - we bend the laws of physics to serve you better

wgp - eyes on the back block, you will follow

agd - we never said that wasn't a problem ;)

probounce - wipers either love us, or hate us

palmer - we will take your money however you want to givt it to us

free flow - depleated uranium good, napster bad

[BTAutoMag]

Tippmann A-5: Why have a hopper this flat on the end? because we had to make at least one thing that breaks on contact.

[Swanky_Sam]

Brass Eagle: best selling paint ball guns "At wall-Mart"

[Lone Wolf2]

BE."We make crappy paint just for you"

[Scootyd]

B.E. When you absolutly positively have to shoot dropped paint.

B.E. paint Pre dropped for your conveneince.

What do you have when your cocker chops? a sloppy cocker

[BTAutoMag]

AGD: we support the use of brass eagle paint, and we offer you the new level 10 to help with our supporter

AGD: Paint on ground + Level 10 = free paint

[darklord]

this thread is hands-down hilarious... even though I've owned both a spyder and a cocker, it's funny to read. I haven't seen many posts badmouthing AGD though ;)

[CRASHKING]

sheriden: AGD isnt the only company that can put a tube on a frame.

AGD: what are aftermarket parts? we dont need no stinkin after market parts

WDP: now with dvd player and a 15" screen

BE: wow our markers can last up to 2000 shots? thats a new record

BE: worlds first disposable marker

[Evil Emperor]

WDP: Cuz dead men cant talk.

[314159]

punisher- i can do that

palmer - you mean the one made out of brass? (relating to custom work on a pirahna)

[SirOssis]

ok here's an actual slogan I just saw.

Dye: Don't freak out, the boomstick won't let ya down


and now my contribution

WDP: the new MP3 Angel. Even if you suck, you can still rock on the field.

[magman007]

WGP: Try our new crispy chicken! (relating to jack and cokes comparison of colonal sandars and bud oor)

[paintslinger]

Originally posted by Evil Emperor
WDP: Cuz dead men cant talk.

WDP: Cuz dead men cant talk. but they sure can text message with the all text messaging service for ir3's.

[Drizit]

for those of you who watched Hackers

punisher - now you to can have your verry own Phantom Freak

tippmann - if you spend enough money on aftermarket parts you can make a 20lb gun.


magman007:

WGP: Try our new crispy chicken! (relating to jack and cokes comparison of colonal sandars and bud oor) :D