Your addicted to paintball if...

[NewMagMan21]

*computer terms can only be related to you through the colorful use of "paintball terminology".
*someone threatens to shoot you and you reply," Put that down I dont have a mask on."

*your "gat" is a .68 caliber
*your school would be a perfect paintball arena.
*you practice your "trigger finger(s)" at work.
*welts are your "battle scars"

I got some now you guys add on to it. It's for one of my classes .If theres something like this let me know.

[Evil1]

If your non-paintballer friends think your nuts for having a marker setup that is worth much more than the car your driving.

If everywhere you go, you think how awesome it would be to play paintball at the places you go.

If all of your neighbors are now used to 3am paintball gun fire when something just has to be tested at that moment.

[nastymag]

you jack your little sisters pink bandana to look agg on the feild

[NewMagMan21]

If your mom can oil your gun just as well as you can.

If your paint bill is higher than your insurance.

If your cat takes hits better than your dad. (Just kidding... ;) thats not cool)

Keep them coming guys I need like 100 or so.

[AGDlover]

If you pets are afraid of you and your paintball gun because you ran around the house dryfireing it at them. (note thats actualy true)

[NewMagMan21]

Heh I (dry firing) bunker my cat. One time it wizzed itself (I wish I could cuss) ;)
Seriously though there was a small puddle. I havent done it since... and never will

[master_alexander]

you got everyone addicted to paintball on your block including your best friends mom's cuosins former roommate who happens to be your dad. lol

if you think to die is a paintball brand (it is, check the spelling)

if you spend more time with paintball than talking to people

if your fingers were life size then they would run a 23 sec. 1/4 mile

everyone else took my other ones...

o well! :rofl:

[NewMagMan21]

If your little sister can outplay your friends

If you can watch action movies without yelling "Check him ref!" after someone get shot and limps away.

If you think the army is after your fingers.

If your fingers diss on fingerboarders. (heh Ilike that one :rolleyes: )

Im pretty much tapped now But I'll have more coming. Keep going guys these are funny... (to me)

[mcdkid]

when you can tell people that you mom wakes you up by jabing you with a broom stick really hard. (my friend did that while getting a physical) lol

[Rather]

When you only care if you meet famous people then gog them. :cool:

[Automaggot68]

Or when you dont do a search and there's already a big thread on these lines.

[aovboy]

Oh, I used to have a big list around here somewhere...I need to find it. One sec...

Okay. It's kinda old, and some local inside jokes are in there, but...it's decent.

I got bored today, and generated a cool list. How many do you apply to?

You might be a Paintballer if...

You say "This is my Boomstick,"...often.

Hitting other guys with your balls is fun.

You yell "Paintcheck!" when thumped.

You could send all your spare barrel plugs back to Brass Eagle, and get enough refund to afford another Revvy.

2lbs. is too heavy for a marker.

"Mouse click" triggers don't cut it any more.

You enjoy the taste of paint.

The JT Headshield isn't cool.

You spend more on paint than on car insurance.

Duct tape still works.

Shooting people with your Timmy doesn't seem the least bit homoerotic.

When folks ask what you are hunting, you say "People," (Props to Ken )

You eat Ramen Noodles for a month to afford the new hopper.

If it weren't for rechargeable batteries, you'd starve.

You fit in the woods better than a "leafy-bug".

People ID you by your mask, not your face.

FPS means more than First Person Shooter.

Instinctivly, while walking into the woods, you yell "Goggles on!"

Only by playing with a pump could you regain your love life.

You shoot dry.

You think of locations as paintball fields, like the office, or some historical monument.

Noone wants to play renegade ball with you anymore.

A barrel extension for a Stroker is more than a perverted idea.

You took sides during the Palmer/Orr dispute.

You've played with a Blade '02.

You eliminated someone with a Blade '02. (Just gogged Dwight today in the backyard )

You stopped buying Squadbusters after the first one.

Welts and bruises go ignored.

JT+VL+BE+WGP=K2

The last one is more than a bunch of variables to you.

You got carpal tunnel syndrome from walking the trigger.

You think Rob Rubin is funny.

Monday, Wednesday, and Friday are the lone reasons you get up in the mornings.

You have the archives of TWB and Weekend Warriors stored in PDF format on your computer.

Turtled Cocker is more than two random words.

The "Bunk'd" video gave you a massive seizure.

You've more invested in your paintball equipment than you do your car.

Gogged is a word.

You took a shop class, just so you could mill your marker.

You stopped caring about Smart Part's patents.

You got a 3rd nipple last Saturday.

You can Fly. Angel Fly.

< 50psi is no longer sarcasm.

You've got Goggleflauge, camo boxers...heck, you had the orthodontist clearcoat your braces and put olive green bands in.

You tap two fingers on the desk when you get bored.

The 6+8 can't support your shooting.

You have a nickname.

When loud noises occur, such as a car backfiring, you hit the ground.

You know how many years Pursuit Marketing, Inc. has been around.

You know what WDP stands for.

You know what AoV stands for.

You don't like getting shot in the mask.

You can actually trace the origin of the Autococker.

You know the Dynasty roster like the months of the year.

You wear a trench coat to the field, but not to look cool.

You use the analogy "When Legacy wins an NXL event..."

You still have your PMI-III/VM-68. (Or any parts for that matter *coughTaggstorecough*)

The name "Gardner" sends chills up your spine.

You still love Ebay.

Contemplation between Red, Pink, and Blue Gatorade is hard.

You take saplings as bunkers.

You twitch when you hear "I want an 18" barrel"

You want a Nel-spot.

You keep old cases of paint in a wine celler.

You have a box of RPS from '92 down there.

You traded your Palm for the new LCD E-frame...heck, who doesn't want to play Solitare as they get bunkered?

You've owned an old Illustrator.

You take a PT Extreme on an airball field.

Electro-pneumag means something to you.

You read all this.

You typed all this.

I bet some of you can relate to some of this. I'll do some more later, if you think it's worth a few minutes of your time.

[B.A.M.]

If you sit at home on your bed shaking untill you get one more shot.

if you can disassemble your gun in under 2 mins.

[MedicDVG]

You can tell the different types of paint just from the taste of the spray through your mask...



You would run in a burning building to save your marker, but not your familiy...



You wear your gear around the house...



Every time a box arrives via UPS/USPS/FED EX your wife just looks at you and says "now what did you buy?"



You spend more on Pb stuff then the GNP of some of the bannana reuplic states...



any of these lame jokes even remotely tickly your funny bone...

[Korrosion]

If you sell a kidney to buy paint.
Your gear is insured for more then your car.
When you put your gear in your car it doubles in value. (the car)
You have more guns then friends.
Your guns ARE your friends.
You had to hitch hike to the field so you could buy paint.
You've done the 200 ball challenge, twice.
If you know the animation frames of the bananna man and draw them in class :dance: .
You look at this smile and think, wow thats shooting slow :shooting: .
You dont measure rof in bps but in $/min.

[NITH]

You have a framed picture on the wall with busted o-rings. (this one is from world cup 03, d-day 04)

FBI has you listed as an airsmith because you opened your garage door one day and everyone on your street reported you for owning an arsonal.

You take long road trips and jump up every one in a while to point out a good ravine in which to play woodsball.

You have more markers then real firearms.

You know more about your markers then your real firearms.

The PDF files of paintball info rival the illegally downloaded music on your PC.

-----

I just came up with these on the spot. Don't laugh, I just looked around my room.

[Echo419]

you jack your little sisters pink bandana to look agg on the feild
Thats so awesome...

If you judge stuff before you buy it, on the likely hood that it might fall out of your Proto Pants

[slade]

ok i havent read the whole thread yet, but...

if you are holding your marker now... extra points if youre currently walking it.

if you spend more time on pb forums/with your gun/at the field than you do with your friends.

if you know the names of movies in which pb markers were used for special effects

if someone says "condom" and you think of paintball

if you know how to tune guns you dont have

if you have friends you met through paintballing

if you have met people who play because you recognized their clothes

if you have a paintball club

if you have thought seriously about petitioning your school for a paintball field

if half of your jokes are paintball jokes ;)

[Thunder Bunny]

I posted this on PBN, here it is again.

When you dryfire so much your dog is used to it (doesn't run out of the room)
When the refs know you by name and what kinds of guns you have
When you have so many guns you have to name them all so others know exactly which ones you're talking about
When you buy a gun just to have it
You have more than a dozen guns
You write poems or haikus about paintball
People at school think you dye your hair when it is really just paint stained
You show off your welts
You take pictures of your welts
You know which brand of paint each one of your guns shoots best
You bought a Co2 tank because it matched your gun
You buy a new gun and get some new upgrades before using it.
You know you have to fix your car so you can drive to the paintball field
You are a member of 4 or more pb boards
You go to the pb store just to browse
You go to play and spend the whole day teching other people's guns
You think about installing cameras on the field so you can watch the replay and point out mistakes you and your friends made
When your dog chews on a paint grenade and pops it in your room
When you know old school guns
You bought old school guns when they were new
Youve been playing for ten years or more
You find shell fragments in your house.
You ref just for free field entry
You have to load your gear on a wagon to move it to the field.


Between me and my brother all these are true.

[warbeak2099]

You can't pay attention in Physics class because you're too busy trying to figure out mathematically how paint to barrel match affects your velocity, range, and groupings.

[Echo419]

If you have ur browser set to refresh this page every 15 seconds.

[sabrefanpc]

If you can talk about a 12" barrel, lube, and condoms without thinking about thinking about your significant other

[germanman]

If you wear your pants/jersey to school/work.
If you've ever petitioned to have a schoolwide paintball team.
If you've tattoed your favorite paintball companies insiqnia on your back.
AND....
If the taste of paint doesn't bother you anymore.

[Creative Mayhem]

If your non-paintballer friends think your nuts for having a marker setup that is worth much more than the car your driving.


OR more to the point, several different full setups each worth more than your car. :wow:

[AGDlover]

When you memorised the serial # to all your paintball parts.
(note i know all mine)

[Pyroboy597]

When you pick up your mouse and practive walking it so you can get better at this game http://www.planeteclipse.com/ego/default.asp?swf=EgoBps.swf

[AGDlover]

my highest is rof 25

[NewMagMan21]

25 w/o spacebar???

Lol when you use the Ego game to pass the time.

EDIT: Ive played that game so much my finger speed went up by 5 bps LOL :rofl:

[bleachit]

http://www.automags.org/forums/showthread.php?t=74521&highlight=obsessed+paintball

a few more here....

[PBX Ronin 23]

1. When you air-walk your fingers while you're driving on the highway.
2. When snapping out of a corner while walking through a mall is a natural thing to do.
3. When you get emotionally irritable if you don't get to play at least once a week.
4. When you obsess about a game you played 3 weeks ago and it's still vivid in your mind.
5. When you think your fathers' first names are Tom, Bud, Glen, Jerry, Hayes and Bob.

[slade]

if youve spent over a year building a renegade field, only to have it shut down by the town... and then you petition the town to have the decision overridden.

when considering buying something, you compare the money spend on said item to what you could buy in paint... and generally tend to go with the paint.

[Lohman446]

When you whine about spending $700 on a new pistol that fires real bullets but don't think anything of spending twice that on a marker.

[AGDlover]

25 w/o spacebar???

Lol when you use the Ego game to pass the time.

EDIT: Ive played that game so much my finger speed went up by 5 bps LOL :rofl:


ya 25 w/o and 39 with space

edit: make that 50 w/ space
57 now!!!

[slade]

forgot this one: if a girl at school asks you if the welt on your neck is a hickey.

[pennzman543]

someone names a town or a state and you tell them all the good paintball field in the area :shooting: :shooting:

[NewMagMan21]

forgot this one: if a girl at school asks you if the welt on your neck is a hickey.
Or if your girlfriend breaks up with you because of the hickey

[Lorenz0666]

If you pets are afraid of you and your paintball gun because you ran around the house dryfireing it at them. (note thats actualy true)

i used to to do the same thing excpets my best freinds lil sister, she would be on the computer, and i would dry fire at her, it would scare the crap out of her

[sabrefanpc]

I caught some flack when i only took some clothes, meds, and my mag when i was forced to evacuate for 2 'canes...

[germanman]

If you hang out with a group of guys that don't look at you funny when you say, "I got a 14" STIFFI last night!"

If you've lost a girlfriend because you chose paintball over her. (Bonus points if it was a marriage.)

If you've tried to put an Electro frame on your Glock.

If you consider Bawls Gurana, MRE's and paint 3 major food groups.

If you're religious and missed Church for a tournament.

If you have a paintbll gun with a 2 digit Cereal #...

[Jeffy-CanCon]

These were some of Durty Dan's Key Indicators for paintball addiction:


you have one specific room in your place of abode, dedicated to keeping all your paintball stuff, your living room.
you think about paintball during sex.
no matter what store you're in, you always look for something you can use for paintball.
no matter what store you're in, you always find something you can use for paintball.
any famous paintball personage is seen as a god in your eyes.
every bit of your disposable income is spent on paintball stuff, even if you don't need it.
you have more than four sets of camouflage
you play paintball every weekend, both days

[bleachit]

you are playing with those canned air dusters for too long, they freeze up and start spraying liquid, you think to yourself, why dont they put a anti siphon tube in there?

[REDRT]

When you spend most of the day on AO? Or is it addicted to mags?

[RedRazor]

you buy welding equipment just to fix the stock mainbody on your old 68 classic. (i had to do this last week)
you took a micrometer to your gun to get measurements to draft up some parts you want to have milled.

[okiTony]

When you get your wife a new marker and/or gear for your wedding anniversary. :D
When you start buying PB clothes for your children. ;)
You have your 1 year old shoot your marker. :eek:
You start walking your fingers wile you’re driving, eating, typing....jkjkjkjkjkjkjkjkjk "get it? look at the letters where your trigger fingers are at." :rolleyes:
Your neighbors know you as the PB guy and not your name. :ninja:
You get all your friends to buy a "MAG". :cool:
Your children toys are old markers you have laying around the house. :p
When your children use your air bunkers for bouncies to play on. :bounce:
When a girls goes out with you because she hears you have a awesome cocker. :wow:

[jamescell]

LOL I know I'm addicted :cheers:

[SAW]

I'm a lost cause. Completely and utterly hopeless.

[rabidchihauhau]

when you have to stay involved because its where your paycheck comes from.....

[Smileatom88]

You guys are crazy funny.

[captian pinky]

when u run down the hall in ur house slide behind the couch and snap shot and dry fire and your mom yells your name and says outside


when you pull out a issue of apg and everyone in your studyhall sighs

when your study hall teacher asks you why you have been reading the same issue for 3 days stright you respond i just started reading it

we you run by your best friend and say you got bunkered

when you talk to someone and you start saying bps fps stiffi cockers angels and mags and they go i here you your teacher asks you to step outside to ask you to not say inopropreate things in class

[Gambit1106]

....
Every time a box arrives via UPS/USPS/FED EX your wife just looks at you and says "now what did you buy?"
...


This is so true!!!!

But you also forgot to add that when the UPS guy shows up you run the box to the basement before your wife can see it came. :D

When you go to play paintball instead of going to your wedding shower.

When you show up at your wedding shower still in some of your gear to pick up the gifts.

Oh and when you do this to your daughter:

[gc82000]

When you think nothing wrong about putting Love Juice in your Angel.

[electriceel125]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
when you talk to someone and you start saying bps fps stiffi cockers angels and mags and they go i here you your teacher asks you to step outside to ask you to not say inopropreate things in class


My teachers now consider them "normal" words.

I really should go cry because most of these are true.

[needtosale]

when a 10 inch barrel is considered short mine is 14 and has 2 pieces with flames milled into it ;)
me and electriceel go to the same school and were friends i believe him when he says that his teacher consider this normal talk but hey so do mine

:dance: i like the banana

[master_alexander]

if your mom bought you a book shelf for your room and you put all your gear on it instead of the closet and all your books in the closet.

you spent 3 hours perfectly balincing your gun.

you say "i have a condom in my pocket from yesterday" and everyone goes eeewww. you forgot you were at school, but lost in a daydream.

you own more gear than games of chess

more to come!

[psychoreaper_666]

you might be adicted to paintball if:
-you use AO
-your favorites list incudes: 888paintball, pbgear.com, AO, PBNation, pbreview, etc, etc, etc..
-your girlfriend says she wants to see your cocker and you dont even think about sex
-your biggest decision of the week is whether to pay the rent or buy paint
-you can tear your gun apart while blindfolded (bonus points if you can put it back together!)

more soon...

[germanman]

If you think of speedball as something OTHER than a mixture of drugs.

If you missed your friends rocking bachelor party for a tournament.

If half your yearly income goes torwards paintball.

[needtosale]

:dance:
paint ball is like sex when its good its really good and when its bad its still pretty damn good

[sabrefanpc]

when your girlfriends question "are you gonna sleep with that gun or me?" doesnt imediatly have an answer.

or it does...

[slade]

this one just happened to me ;)

if your friend mentions the matrix and you immediately think of the marker, not the movie.

[slade]

if it doesnt seem at all disturbing when a 30 year old guy you met online offers to show you pics of his stiffi.

these are all from today :D:
if your friend gets a new marker (which youve never had/shot etc.) and you know more about it and adjusting it than he does.

if your friend points a spraybottle at you and the first thing you think is "i dont have a mask on!!"

if you skip lunch so you'll have enough money for paint the next time youre going... which happens to be in a few days.

if 3 people one after another ask you "is that a space frame on a mag?!" to which you have to explain that its a mech vert frame modeled after an angel frame... and then one person comes up to you and says "hey nice mag, is that a logic frame?"... then you know you've met a fellow AOer :D. (credit goes to Alpha)

[sabrefanpc]

this came from a guy ive played with, but apparently since he entered college hes been going twice aweek to sell blood plasma for $15 (for paint air and fees). he started mentioning a sperm bank but i cut him off...