Evil website

[Codekevin0403]

Anybody been on the Evil website? I was looking at some stuff, and i have to tell you, somebody who's working there is seriously screwed up in the mind. Who in the right mind would advertise something like that? It's completely stupid, like an 8-year-old wrote it. (i would write 4-year-old, but most 4-year-olds don't know how to type) Look at this, its the description for the Intimidator Bolt.


Have you ever wondered what freaking retard called these things bolts on paintball guns. I mean seriously what on earth o these things have anything to do with bolts. I have a great idea, lets rename these things blow sticks. I think that makes more sense, because they are kind of like sticks with holes in them. I guess that is more like a flute though, flutes it is. Which remminds me how on earth did that girl from american pie ever get one of those up her ....... Do you think she could play mary had a litttle lamb? Probablly not on our intimidator bolt because of the limited notes she could play.


What the heck is that??? That sure is going to attract a lot of customers. Look at this one for the Evil Smokestack.


I have gotten really sick and tired of writing different descriptions of this stupid thing. So i decided to write about something else. There is this guy John Rathbun that works for PMI, honestly he does little to nothing there, mostly punchs buttons and talks on the phone and spends to much time in the bathroom. He is very self conscious about how I give a hard time on this website. Well he deserves it. He is dorky, and yet pretends that he is cool. Now there is nothing worse than a dork who is a poser so i have made it my personal crusade to make him break down and cry. My ultimate goal is to get him into therapy, well for the second time.



Now i'm not saying the website is bad, or trying to flame it or anyone that's into Evil's products, cause they're really high quality, but i just don't get the advertising. I mean, not all of the things are like that, but....i just don't get it.

[Chronobreak]

hmmm... :confused:


first of all the trollish flame for some pmi guy was uncalled for... :nono:

second of all..its a website not yours, dont like it dont buy it/go there. that simple

its like me making a post or calling a radio station saying i hate their music instead of just litenting to somone else.

...let it go..

btw i smoke out of my evil pipe.. :ninja: couldnt resist :rofl:

[Codekevin0403]

yeah i know i just find it a little werid maybe just wondering if anyone else thought it was a little weird too. For me i like their products, especially the pimp, it just struck me as a little odd.

["the FitZ"]

they seem to use apathy in most of their product ads. Well whatever works for them, they make good stuff. And since Evil is owned by pmi, I'm pretty sure, these two guys may know each other and it may just be friendly teasing.

[ColdFuzion]

Spyder / Piranaha Bolt
Do you know what I use the bolt? I use it to stir my margaritas, but for those of you that are unfortunate enough to own a spyder, you may as well slap this in there. I personally guarantee you will get over twenty balls a second and add at least 700 shots per tank. If you are starting to wonder how this is possible considering the low expense of this upgrade, well that is because you are dumb. Yes the same person you look at in the mirror.

Shocker Part

This upgrade part is for the Shocker™. I have no idea what this thing does but I am sure it cant hurt your shoebox sized gun. Plus it has an adjustment screw on the front and those are always good.

(-our webmaster is crazy... this thing actually replaces the fill poppet AND firing rod. The adjustment screw is used to control how fast the air chamber refills, it's called dynamic regulation if you want to know. Bottomline, its dope, for the four guys who still use the 'shoebox'.)



I wonder if it helps them marketing-wise to call customers stupid and unfortunate... :nono:

*EDIT* I just added the Shocker Part.. Atleast their editor (Or whoever added the last bit) has a bit of since.. This one really got me aggrivated because I used to own a Shoebox, and it was very VERY good. Also (For the webmaster), a TON of people have old shockers. If a Mississippian has had one, I assure you that more than 4 people have had them.

-Cold

[minimag03]

I have always liked their descriptions. A lot of other company descriptions are the same and inlcude things like "the highest flow" and "the best quality". Evil tells you how their stuff is better with a little witt (sp?).

[ColdFuzion]

Don't feel like editing... Here.

Lanyard

I don't kknow when but a few years ago these things became popular. I think they are stupid, what kind of blockhead attaches this giant piece of fabric to their keys. Oh i know it is probably the same dense kids that attach a chain to their wallet. Like you are so Rich you actually need a chain to your wallet, cmon stop fooling yourself you insignificant crackheads. The real reason you need these lanyards is so you can attach a namecard to your neck so you can introduce yourself with all of the ladies because they cant understand what you are saying when you are slurring all of your words.

This stuff is horrible.. Evil just lost all cool points to me.

-Cold

[JAM]

to each their own.

i like it, and in most cases, it's pretty true stuff.

[jenarelJAM]

sounds like evil might have gotten a new web designer, and he got bored...?
then again, i dont know evil much, i haven't ever gone to their site.
its funny at least, even if it wont help them sell it to me

[SpecialBlend2786]

Thats how the evil site has always been. I always thought it was hilarious. I especially like the description for the Shocker "part"


"Shocker Part

This upgrade part is for the Shocker™. I have no idea what this thing does but I am sure it cant hurt your shoebox sized gun. Plus it has an adjustment screw on the front and those are always good. "

[TeamNausea]

Cold fuzion- I doubt that evil/PMI loses any sleep over you being upset by their awesome descriptions. Let them do what they do and if it bothers you that much just stop worrying/reading about them. I find them all amusing and would still pick up there stuff regardless it gives the site some flavor opposed to the normal blah blah blah this item is the best blah blah blah.

[teufelhunden]

Yeah, I <3 the Shocker Part as well.

See, this is what many will call an attempt at an alternate marketing style.. instead of the omgwtfbbq our gun r teh f4st3st!! crap everybody else slings, at least Evil has a little fun. Plus it helps with the bad boy image that Evil is trying to maintain.

[magman007]

yea, its deffinitely old news, and its some funny stuff

[gc82000]

Link anyone??

that clicky thing (http://www.evil-paintball.com/)

[MadPSIence]

LMFAO

Does your paint have Grand Canyon sized seams, oily shells, football shaped shells? Accept our sympathy. Unfortunately for the competition, we have our **** together and know how to make a ball. We know when your paint bag looks like the exxon valdez wrecked inside, you're in trouble. We also don't think it is a good thing when there are flat spots that look like your mentally challenged cousin who was dropped by his mom. All in all, it just comes down to doing it right the first time, every time.

[SpecialBlend2786]

best one ever:


"Spyder / Piranaha Bolt

Do you know what I use the bolt? I use it to stir my margaritas, but for those of you that are unfortunate enough to own a spyder, you may as well slap this in there. I personally guarantee you will get over twenty balls a second and add at least 700 shots per tank. If you are starting to wonder how this is possible considering the low expense of this upgrade, well that is because you are dumb. Yes the same person you look at in the mirror. "

[Automaggin2]

I thought it was kinda funny



http://www.automags.org/forums/showthread.php?t=55871&highlight=evil+website

[FSU_Paintball]

To the people whining about how unprofessional it is... psh, get a life. Don't buy from them if you don't like it. I personally think it's amusing.