Things we learned from movies...list yours

[Carbon]

you can outrun explosions.

Love is 3x more romantic and fun when you are both crazy.

The dude that eveyone thinks is dead is actually alive and is the antagonist.

In the future Artificaly Intelegent machines dont understand the concecpt of thermo dynamics, thus use humans as a power source.

1/2" thick wooden tables stops bullets.

Guns are really inexpensive and you throw them away when you run out of bullets.

its ok to drive your car without paying attention to the road.

[Warwitch]

I learned that nice girls like scoundrels from Han Solo :D

[Head knight of Ni]

Keanu Reeves sucks
Nicholas Cage sucks
Val Kilmer sucks
Tom Cruise Sucks

Sean Connery is God
Clint Eastwood is Zeus
Jack Nicholson is Odin

Don't say Jehova. Ever. I mean it.

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of :cuss:
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...

[Dark Side]

There are vampire raves.

As long as you were a tux you are a badmofo.

Cars that shoot rockets are street legal.

There is an entire world full of mythical creatures that are invisible to all but a select few who have inherited some sort of guardianship role from their soon dead mentor.

[Eagle]

that good guys can shrug off a bullet wound :D

[Lenny]

The only things any man will ever really understand about women are:
1.) Some of them have boobs
and
2.) Most of them have vaginas.

:ninja:

[MoeMag]

Don't say Jehova. Ever. I mean it.


He said the name of the lord god! STONE HIM!
:rofl:

besides that...
Bullets spark thus can make a normal car explode in a giant fireball.

[Carbon]

There are vampire raves.
LOL

[StygShore]

2 pistols fired while rolling on the ground are accurate enough to wipe out all your enemies ( Willis, Gibson, Smith, Van Dame, Segal, and many others )

Most pistols hold approximately 30 shots, and you always run out when you need 1 more bullet.

Being shot with a shotgun will send you flying at least 10 feet backwards, and wont alwasy kill you.

look here for quite an extensive and sometimes funny list as well...

http://www.geocities.com/area51newmexico/page5.html

and last but not least -

Nobody Touches the Priest.... Several E-cookies if you can identify th emovie that line came from...

Styg

[bleachit]

you never ever have to worry about a bomb exploding. It will always be diffused at the last second, or in James Bond's case, the last 007 second.

[Warwitch]

I learned that Arnold will be back :headbang:


Keanu Reeves sucks
Nicholas Cage sucks
Val Kilmer sucks
Tom Cruise Sucks

You forgot John Travolta!

[Carbon]

http://www.geocities.com/area51newmexico/page5.html

Styg

NICE!

[etjoyride]

Nobody Touches the Priest.... Several E-cookies if you can identify th emovie that line came from...

Styg

what comes to mind is owen wilson in shanghai noon running across the abbey and shooting the dirty sheriff with only one bullet- he was wearing priest robes...

[StygShore]

what comes to mind is owen wilson in shanghai noon running across the abbey and shooting the dirty sheriff with only one bullet- he was wearing priest robes...


No siiir....


I'll give you a hint, its said with a heavy irish accent


Styg

[Niox]

The meaning of life is 42. It is possible to have too much wensleydale. Never forget crackers when on a picnic trip to the moon. To be really cool answer the phone with "Bonjour". Sean Connery shtill kicksh sherioush assh. Green ogres are most joyous. And finally you can carry on fighting! Even when you have no arms and legs!

[Empyreal Rogue]

No siiir....


I'll give you a hint, its said with a heavy irish accent


Styg

Too easy of a hint. :p Boondock Saints.

I've learned that:
The nice guy almost never finishes last.
All cars explode on impact.
Reloading is a myth (So long as you're wearing the bandana).
Gypsy's exist.
Americans can become Samurai.
And finally...
Breaking the law is okay if you did it for a good reason.

[StygShore]

Too easy of a hint. :p Boondock Saints.

No siiiir..... nice try though... that movie was kinda weak....

The actor with the Irish accent does not normally have one


Styg

[bentothejam1n]

No siiiir..... nice try though... that movie was kinda weak....

The actor with the Irish accent does not normally have one


Styg
snatch

[StygShore]

no siiir...

But thats a good movie once you get past all the heavy accents.... and that was a Pikey accent mr Pitt was using, not Irish.


Styg


Desert Eagle 5.0.... yours says Replica

[Empyreal Rogue]

no siiir...

But thats a good movie once you get past all the heavy accents.... and that was a Pikey accent mr Pitt was using, not Irish.


Styg


Desert Eagle 5.0.... yours says Replica

Lock Stock.

But I don't remember that scene about the priest. :confused:

[StygShore]

nope still not it - its an older movie like late 80's

ooo oooo something else I learned from movies - Snatch actually... - Pigs will eat ANYTHING!



Styg

[Jimmykaboots]

Keanu Reeves sucks
Nicholas Cage sucks
Val Kilmer sucks
Tom Cruise Sucks

Sean Connery is God
Clint Eastwood is Zeus
Jack Nicholson is Odin

Don't say Jehova. Ever. I mean it.

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of :cuss:
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...
Hahah i know that song! Always look on the bright side of life, by a musical called Spamalot/Holy Grail.

[Lenny]

Hahah i know that song! Always look on the bright side of life, by a musical called Spamalot/Holy Grail.
Umm... Life of Brian?

[ahellers]

Mother F'n snakes dont belong on Mother F'n planes!!!
t

[Dark Side]

Every double barreled shotgun can fire 3 shots before reloading.

Recoil doesn't really exist.

[RobOpel]

You never want to costar in a movie with Linda Hamilton or Sigourney Weaver, especially Sigourney Weaver.

Nemesis: A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent.

1/4 mile drag races usually last 10 min and every car has to shift at least 7 times, regardless of the number of gears it actually has. Body kits and t.v.s also make you faster

If there's a good sci-fi movie, more than likely it will have a crappy sequel.

The choppa.

Get to it.

[ahellers]

Shopping malls = save havens during a Zombie invasion :shooting:
t

[bentothejam1n]

nope still not it - its an older movie like late 80's

ooo oooo something else I learned from movies - Snatch actually... - Pigs will eat ANYTHING!



Styg
the 80's comment gave it away
a prayer for the dying

[Eagle]

speaking of the boondock saints, great movie, but stupid scene: jump off the roof of a 5 or 6 story building, land on a baddy, and get up and run away.

[StygShore]

the 80's comment gave it away
a prayer for the dying


Winner!


Styg


You get 6 E-cookies!!!


and a nanner

:dance:

[warpig13]

That Jenna Jameson likes to....er....I mean......Goonies never say die?

[BigEvil]

I have learned that;

-No self respecting southerner uses instant grits
-The tears of gypsies can prevent aids
-Asian people have a really aweful facination with poop
-The toy doll of Oscar Goldman is worth WAY more than the one of Steve Austin
-If droids could think, we would all be in trouble.

[Eagle]

that you shouldn't underestimate the power of the dark side

[Dark Side]

that you shouldn't underestimate the power of the dark side


Heh, free advertising! :headbang:

[bleachit]

that you shouldn't underestimate the power of the dark side


never give up, because there is always good in your father, turned evil.

[Pneumagger]

If you can stand upright while effortlessly shooting a minigun and flexing your arms... You get to be a governor. (Jesse Ventura & Teh Govanah)

Remote advanced alien worlds have unbelievable technology yet the people live in a state of ancient rural habitats, caves, and tee pee villages. (Star wars, Star Treck, ... )

Theres a governament agency that can arrest you for crimes you haven't committed yet.

When your stranded on a desert island or another remote location, facial hair ceases to grow due to the fact you don't have a razor to keep it shaved.

Cleopatra and every other attractive hebrew female shaved her legs despite living 3000 years prior to razors.

Finally... In the end, the Apes win.

[thecavemankevin]

speaking of the boondock saints, great movie, but stupid scene: jump off the roof of a 5 or 6 story building, land on a baddy, and get up and run away.

he didn't run away, he limped off

no matter how big the jump, a car will always land it and drive off no problems (unless you have stiffler in the car)

everyone's high school experience was filled with tons more sex than mine :( (unless you f'ed a pie)

you never need a mouse to navigate a computer...and everyone can hack


chicks will do anything for a $.02 set of beeds or a GGW t-shirt...and i mean anything! :clap: :headbang:

[Warwitch]

That Jenna Jameson likes to....er....I mean......Goonies never say die?


:spit_take

[Jeffy-CanCon]

- Groups of random American teenagers can outfight trained soldiers or terrorists.
- The best surgeons/soldiers/pilots/cops are always mavericks.
- Police officers are worse at high speed driving than anyone else.

[trevorjk]

to keep on keepin on

[thecavemankevin]

computers will always have some kick arse graphic on display for no reason what so ever that do nothing....but hey they look cool!

[d4m4don3]

Chuck norris has an infinite amount of enemies that have regeneration when in a firefight. :cool:

[cdacda13]

The devil is in fact a lawyer.
God is a black man.
Time travel is possible just by looking at pictures.
Cell phones never have to be charged
Greed is Good
If your under the age of 25, you're a hacker.
Secret government agencies exist.
Area 51 is real.
Water can kill Aliens.
Any 40 year old man can play in the major leagues, and sometimes throw a perfect game.
EDIT: Last one-
"The Man" will take down any one who makes it out of the 'hood.

[warpig13]

The password is New England Clam Chowder.

[WingMan13]

That... "from now until eternity, the only thing you'll be able to count on in your pathetic little existence is never knowing why!" :ninja:

[bleachit]

although, they may kill us... we will still maintain our freedom.

when reviving long dead species through cloning, absolutely nothing can go wrong.

when your friends insist that you do something followed by the phrase "what's the worse that can happen", or something similar, dont do it. Plenty bad can happen.

[chairman_mao]

No one, not even the most powerful evil Shaolin monk who has killed many strong pious warriors, is immune to acid lava.

[Warwitch]

I learned that the Dude abides :p

and also that if you are being chased by zombies and you jump into a car it wont start until the zombies actually touch the car.

[warpig13]

I learned that the Dude abides :p



Your out of your element Warwitch!
;)

[Warwitch]

Your out of your element Warwitch!
;)


Do you see what happens when you**** a stranger in the ***?

[Pajamas, Yay!]

It's never a moon; it's always a space station.

[Pajamas, Yay!]

No one, not even the most powerful evil Shaolin monk who has killed many strong pious warriors, is immune to acid lava.

Acid lava sounds absolutely terrifying.

[Doobie]

Really big explosions happen in real slow motion.

[warpig13]

You either Live free or Die Hard.

Oh and kazakstan is the greatest country in the world.
It also has three major problems:
Social
Economic
And Jew.

[Dark Side]

Nobody ever listens to the wiseman.
Medieval knights often fall for the old "Your shoelace is untied" trick.
Department store employees know how to construct robotic limbs.
If you ever swallow a six inch tall version of yourself do not add water.
Some books contain black holes.
Never mumble the magic words.
Every car has one chemistry book in it's trunk.
Rotting corpses have a problem pronouncing "forth."
When wrestling a skeleton try the backbreaker - very effective.




Copied from badmovies.org

[Head knight of Ni]

Shop smart, shop S-Mart.


Napalm smells like victory. :argh:

Chinese people can fly!

[thecavemankevin]

Shop smart, shop S-Mart.



hail to the king baby! :headbang:

[Warwitch]

If a gun goes off on a jet it will decompress and you will be sucked out of the window. :eek:

[Thordic]

chicks will do anything for a $.02 set of beeds

You don't need movies to learn that, buy some beads and hit the town. It works, as long as Jeremy isn't hanging out with you.

[skife]

i've learned that it was one guy with six guns.

diehard is the best christmas movie ever.
everyone wears converse chuck taylor's
average people can land airplanes with no training.

[thecavemankevin]

i've learned that it was one guy with six guns.
.

it was NOT a huge serial back crusher



You don't need movies to learn that, buy some beads and hit the town. It works, as long as Jeremy isn't hanging out with you.

something tells me that if i want to keep what is left of my balls i'd better not

[Carbon]

diehard is the best christmas movie ever.



bahahahhahahah

holy crap!

you're right!

[nmib]

Ill never sleep anywhere in Europe.
I know Kung Fu.
The chickens have talons.
Pulling out isnt always a safe bet.
The Goat.

[Altimas]

Its okay to kiss your sister if you dont know she is your sister.

Hairy Midgets who walk around barefoot and cuddle eachother are in fact called hobbits.

Peasants who win jousting tournaments and earn their knighthood are also gay cowboys.

If you kiss a female police detective make sure she indeed a female and not a disgrunteld Male Dolphins Football Player.

Never do *** to mouth.

It is never okay to bring back phrases from olden times such as "Porch Monkey."

[etjoyride]

It is never okay to bring back phrases from olden times such as "Porch Monkey."

"It's ok, i'm taking it back"

[t0nnn]

it someone farts on your pillow and you sleep on it, you get pink eye

[rkjunior303]

Laces Out!!!!

[Warwitch]

Peasants who win jousting tournaments and earn their knighthood are also gay cowboys.



:spit_take

[nmib]

Laces Out!!!!

Your gun is digging into my hip.

[Eagle]

You can get a guy to watch a love story if it has Arnold (The Terminator)
Super pure plutonium looks like shampoo with aluminum foil in it (the Manhattan Project)
It takes half as long to saw through your ankle as it does a pair of hand cuffs (Mad Max)

[Swampy]

Blowing up cans of gas is fun
You can launch a car a 100ft or so, it will land on all four tires and drive off. - Dukes of Hazard.

The air speed of a Sallow
Albino rabbits are killers
Theres castles in Europe full of nymphos (SP?)
They world is banana shaped - Monty Pythons Holy Grail

State Troopers have way to much free time - Super Troopers

Everything in both jack:cuss: movies hurts.

[Carbon]

The badguy snipers invariably miss their shots due to unforseen circumstances such as:

Loud noises that cause the target to move too rapidly or to trip and fall.

random bus.

random flashes of light

random wildlife

perfectly timed billow of smoke

[wetwrks]

You must nuke em' from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

No matter what bar you go to, someone will enevitably be killed while you are there.

If the Goblin King offers to do something for you, do not accept.

Shoes make for a stylish ladies hat.

We need bigger guns.

The big Russian will loose in the end.

Wherever you go, there you are.

Any group of mercenaries gathered to do a heist will have at least one traitor.

All you need to do to replace another individual is to take their facial appearance.

You can steal someones soul, memories, and abilities by cutting their head off.

Cutting someones head off causes an immense electrical storm that will blow out every piece of glass for 50 feet.

No one ever responds to reports of glass exploding and localized electrical storms.

One guy, unarmed, can defeat any number of armed opponents.

Attatching a grenade or dynamite to an arrow won't decrease the range you can shoot the arrow nor does it mess with the ballance of the flying arrow.

The timing of any explosive device is always faster or slower than it is supposed to be.

Mick Jagger can neither sing nor act.

Oh and on that note. Bonus trivia points: Who can tell us who taught Mick Jagger to dance?

[Vircolac]

Charlie's Angels are perfectly capable of outrunning helicopter rocket attacks.

If Salma Hayek lets you drink alcohol from her toes as she pours it down her thigh while doing a sexy dance on the bar, you ain't got long to live, buddy.

Chinese people can fight with swords while standing on twigs!

[blizpaintball42]

30 goons with assult rifles never hit the guy standing in the middle of their circle, or eachother for that matter.

[Dark Side]

If Salma Hayek lets you drink alcohol from her toes as she pours it down her thigh while doing a sexy dance on the bar, you ain't got long to live, buddy.


But by that point, who cares? :headbang:

[Kloki1971]

Every keystroke on a computer results in tiny beeps.

Cars can squeal their tires on any surface (Dirt, Mud, Ice...)

Every night has a full moon.

If you are in a raft on the ocean, somehow you always remain dry.

No one EVER gets seasick.

[MagMan5446]

what a milf was.

[Pneumagger]

what a milf was.

That a cherry pie is a good substitude for american pie.

Off topic: If cake was truely better than pie it would be called american cake - but it's not. :p

[warpig13]

Learned that Superman could only have sex with Louis with a kryptonite condom, but that would kill him.

Cookie stand is NOT part of the food court.

It's called inter-species erotica.

But, What's a Neubian?

[olinar]

children should learn to fear and respect the escalator.

there is always enough time to pull someone out of a car that is about to blow up.

[Pneumagger]

Guns don't give people power... the power is in the bullets.

[Lee]

diehard is the best christmas movie ever.
^yup



going barefoot on carpet and making fists w/ your toes cures jet lag.

[Pzippy]

I learned that $1000000000 in ransom will fit easily into one suitcase.

[robnix]

I learned that it truly is possible to get a parking place right in front of the hotel/restaraunt/club/apartment in the downtown area of any major city in the country at any time of the day or night.

[Nick E]

If Salma Hayek lets you drink alcohol from her toes as she pours it down her thigh while doing a sexy dance on the bar, you ain't got long to live, buddy.


Vampires live in strip joints. You've been warned.

[Badmovies.org]

"Things I Learned From This Movie" is actually one of the sections I write for every review I do. I don't go around spamming about my site, but I love and review b-movies.

A couple of favorites:

If it looks like a man-eating plant, then it probably is a man-eating plant.
Fruit bats are, strangely enough, carnivorous.
Sweat-soaked shirts burn easily and make excellent torches.
Dinosaur is Latin for "stuff glued on lizard."
Flare guns and fire extinguishers are the most powerful weapons known to man.