awesome quotes

[Thor the Mighty]

post some

[Wang]

"poopy!"

--my cousin

[ThePatriot]

"Never drink the bong water"

[X-Plosive]

"This thread is pointless and going no where." -AGD


sorry, I just had to:)

[Sir. Foxalot]

"Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, in order to assure the survival and success of liberty. This much we pledge- and more."
John F. Kennedy

"I hold it to be an inalienable right of anybody to go to He** in his own way."
Robert Frost

"We've got the best goverment money can buy"
Unknown

"What the American public doesnt know is exactly what makes them the American public"
Dan Akroyd in Tommy Boy

"I think you should defend to death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats."
Woody Allen, speaking about the KKK

"Democraacy's the worst form of goverment except for all the others."
Winston Churchill

"The first casualty when war comes is the truth"
Hiram Johnson

I think I can get some more if ya want I have all these andmmore on my bedroom wall.

[Thor the Mighty]

"anyone who gets caught by frankenstein deserves to die!"

"DAAAAAAH!"-arman in the funny picture thread

"autocockers suck" budd orr

[Zumina]

"Blaming guns for Columbine is like blaming spoons for Rosie O'Donnel being fat"
--SUN WARRIOR

[FooTemps]

"ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!" -That game... Can't remember the name right now...

"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" -That squirrel

"YATTA!" - Probably every person who speaks Japanese

[MajorDamage]

"I am the Awesome!"--Me
"I am Sparticus"--Guy from That Thing You Do
"A man in a really nice camper wants to put our song on the radio!"--Steve Zahn in That Thing You Do
"I wish I could be you, WATCHING ME! The most talented man in HISTORY"--Jack Black
"!A!"--Me and Gogo!
"Hoo Ha!"--Me!
"I eat my own feces!"--ME!
"Fight 4 Food!"--...ME! AGAIN! Muhahaha
"Now out of all the mercury you could have chosen to inject into your baby's anus, this is the best"--Baby Blue
and of coarse...

ENDO!

[gimp]

"You have five fingers but only two nuts" - Me, one night when I was very intoxicated.

[Jonneh]

"Arguing on the Internet is like running in the special olympics, even if you win, you're still retarded"
-Some Smarty man Intarweb Wizard

[dio91]

"the key to like is not sucking"
-austin

"me and tim, a hunting we went, found three maidens in a tent since they was three and we was two, i buck one and tim buck two"
-anonymous

"now you do the flippa rooney switcha jobba"
-gavin a.k.a. the gavinator

""wow like half the kids in our school smoke, i thought it was like less"
-me and auger at the trainstation

"now for some tasty tid-bits"
-fr. shaughnessy

here is why the 2-12 bills are gonna make he playoffs...."all the other teams r gonna be forced to forefit all games do to stearoids and the bills r the only team that didnt do drugs so they get the automatic superbowl"
-austin

"i miss being able to gallop around the hallways at flood like the dudes from monty python and not get made fun of 1 bit"
-austin


"If A equals success, then the formula is A = X + Y + Z. X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut."
-Albert Einstein

"Its God's job to forgive Osama Bin Laden,
It's our job to arrange the meeting."
- joe d

"In 1981 a guy had a heart attack after playing the game BERSERK - video gaming's only known fatality."
- annonymous

[slateman]

"In the land of the blind, the One-Eyed Man is King."

Max Payne

The point of war isn't to die for your country, its to make the other bastard die for his.-- Gen. George Patton


My sig


I'll post a bunch more when I get home.

[dio91]

"wanna hear a retarded cat? MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOO!!!"
-austin

[Ariestsheft]

"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.'" - George Carlin

[the JoKeR]

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

[udtseal]

"The only easy day, was yesterday!" --US Navy SEAL motto

:D

[hawpunch]

"if i am not for myself, who am i? if i am only for myself, than what am i?"

aloha,

jae park

[slateman]

I'm home...here ya go:

Some say there is a fine line between insanity and genius. This line has a color. This color is gray. Gray is my favorite color.



“The Point of War isn’t to die for your country; its to make the other bastard die for his.”
George Patton

Beware of stupid people in large groups.


Plunder: To take property of another without observing the decent and customary reticence’s of theft.
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary

"Insanity is often the logic of an accurate mind overtasked."
Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.


"You can get much farther with a kind word and a gun than with a kind word alone" Al Capone



The man who fears nothing is as powerful as he who is feared by everyone Friedrich Von Schiller


"If its not part of the solution, Its part of the problem"


Quote: Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy
Author: Benjamin Franklin

[slateman]

More...

"It is better to be THOUGHT of as a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."


"Those who give up freedom for security deserve neither." --Benjamin Franklin


It’s strange that men should take up crime when there are so many legal ways to be dishonest. --Al Capone


Shaw leaned over and whispered to the titled woman seated next to his right, “Madam, would you sleep with me for $100,000?” After some mild quivering, the flustered women answered, “Why possibly I just might.” A moment or two later the playwright once again leaned over and asked, “Madam, would you sleep with me for $20?” The suddenly offended noble women indignantly replied, “Of course not! What do you think I am?” Shaw regarded her briefly and wryly responded, “Madam, we have already established what you are. All that we are doing now is haggling about the price.”


"All our efforts to make our men hate the enemy has just made them hate the war more."
--T.E. Lawrence


The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena... who strives valiantly, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in worthy causes. Who, at best, knows the triumph of high achievement and who, at worst, if he fails, fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.

--Theodore Roosevelt


In the Land of the Blind, the one-eyed man is King.
--Max Payne

[slateman]

more:D :D

The following is a transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995.

Radio conversation released by the US Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.

Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.

Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.



The superior leader gets things done
With very little motion.
He imparts instruction not through many words
But through few deeds.
He keeps informed about everything
But interferes hardly at all.
He is a catalyst
And although things wouldn’t get done as well
If he weren’t there,
When they succeed he takes no credit.
And because he takes no credit
Credit never leaves him.

--Sixth Century B.C. Chinese philosopher Lao-Tzu on Leadership.

[beam]

"sorry...but that wasn't an ACTUAL radio conversation"

--slateman

[the JoKeR]

I agree. Now if it read.....

"Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision, EH."

or:

"Call back later, EH, we're watching Curling!"

..... I'd believe it more!:D


(OK, I'm braced for the flame attack from North of the Boarder)

[the JoKeR]

Canadians: don't take this wrong, I like your country, but I found this one funny:

"Canada? On a good day our Salvation Army could kick it's arse!"
-comedian, but I don't recall which one.

[Magsrule3]

"Cats always land on their feet-I'll have to test that theory"-me

"I dont let school get in the way of my education"

"What"

[PaInTbAlLeR476]

"Amatures built the Ark(noah and the ark) and proffesionals built the titanc." i guess the ark didnt sink?

[Tbone]

"I'm only this far and only tomorrow leads my way."

-Dave Matthews

[FooTemps]

"I'm gonna have to go goldfish on ya!" - ME! stupid quote I know. I'm just bored.

[Arman/XPM]

My turn

"To those who are asking only for freedom, we ask, you want the freedom to do what?" -- The Shah, interview with Kayhan, Tehran

[tsc]

|PotatoBoy| i need to quit altoids
|PotatoBoy| i think i'm starting to sweat mint

MagikMarker53: exactly.
Velchosus: exactly, what..?
MagikMarker53: I'm not sure
Velchosus: lol
MagikMarker53: I am very exactly unsure of what it is that is exactly
Velchosus: exactly is exactly the term used, to exactly define the exact meaning of the exact word, we call exactly, thats exactly what my exact thoughts on this exact matter is, anyhow.

|Malichi| this IRC thing is kinda cute.. the whole log on and bug people you dont really know:)

|Noob^Saibot`| You look sexy tonight, Rav.
|Ravena_| yeah..sure I do
|Ravena_| and you're drunk
|Noob^Saibot`|> Like a glass of water!

DizWolf| who wants to call a level three sex offender?
*LilKiddo picks up the phone and dials Diz's number
|PB-Tom| DizWolf what's level three? Assaulting women, children and cows?

"Assassins!"
- Arturo Toscanini (1867-1957) to his orchestra

"How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself."
- Anais Nin (1903-1977)

[FooTemps]

during a project presentation...

"...Japanese noodles eat people........DOH!"
-me

[clockworkmiller]

Me: its your vagina
Rachel: it's your fashion statement
Me: damn straight
Rachel: hopefully one day i'll get some of that fashion sense from you. and as payment, i'll give you some gonnhorrea back

"when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro"

"only in this country would people find 400,000 deaths acceptable, and find 756,000 arrests insufficient"
(in case your wondering, that is the number of people who die from cigarettes to the number of people arrested relating to marijauna)

"papa smurf gets mad play"

"lets make the pledges drink the bong water. whoever doesnt throw up, is in!"

"hmm...bong...booooonnnnnngggggg.....boing...so, whose up for some mad shagging tonight?"

"last night i read about sex. tonight its marijuana. this is why the U of A owns your school"

And for some by other people:

"you have a weird thing for canandian melodrama"
"no, i have a werid thing for girls who say aboot"

"and all at once you look across a crowded room and see the way that light attaches to a girl"

"i can always change my name if thats what you need"

"everytime she sneezes i believe its love"

"i want nothing more than to sit outside heaven's door and listen to you breathing"

[masterninja]

"It's not that I'm that great, It's just that you're soo bad"
Karl Gotch

"There can be only one"
"Fear is the path to the darkside"
"Do or do not, there is no try"
"It is always faster to take the time to do something right the first time"
"Never give up, never surrender"
"Get your paws off of me you damn dirty ape"
"Damn the man, save the empire"
"Your lack of faith disturbs me"
"There's nothing stronger than the heart of a volunteer"
"There is no right or wrong, only fun and boring"
"Don't make me destroy you"
"The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one"
"The man who knows he is a fool is not such a great fool"
"Nothing is unreal"
"Be like water"

[Snappy]

Sigh, some people can't quote the Patton movie correctly...so pay attention!

"I want you to remember that no b****** ever won a war by dieing for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb b****** die for his country."

"When you put your hand into a bunch of goo, that a moment before was your best friend's face...you'll know what to do. Now here's another thing I want you to remember. I don't want to get any messages saying that 'We are holding our position.' We're not holding anything. We'll let the Hun do that. We are advancing constantly, and we are not interested in holding on to anything EXCEPT the enemy! We're going to hold on to him by the nose, and we're going to kick him in the a**! We're going to kick the H*** out him all the time, and we're going to go through him like CRAP through a GOOSE!" - Patton

"Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun." - Ash

"Pain is weakness leaving the body." - Captain Rooms, Ranger

"Early to rise,
and early to bed,
may make a man healthy,
but socially dead." - I believe Animanics, Wheel of Morality

And my all time favorite, dirty but true...

Procrastination is just like masturbation. It feels good at first, but in the end your just screwing yourself.

[BTAutoMag]

i like the one in my sig

[MagMan5446]

"What doesn't kill you can only make you stronger"
"It's all gravy baby" -me
"I'd rather die like a man, than live like a coward
there's a ghetto up in heaven and it's ours...."
"Watch me, until they stop me, bury, murder me or drop me"
"YOU THINK YOU CAN KILL ME?! YOU CAN'T KILL ME!!" -Scarface
"And so castles made of sand, fall in the sea, eventually..."
"Let the lovin', let the lovin come to me"
"Ain't nothin at the top but a bucket and a mop, and an illustrated book about birds"

"I have a dream..."


And dio91, who's austin?

[sniper1rfa]

"are you suggesting coconuts migrate?"
-coconut argument in monty python

"i didnt know we had a king... i thought we were an autonomous collective." -peasent women

"theres no such thing as stupid questions, just stupid people" -lots of people

"its a Y...
...Yogurt! I hate yogurt, even with strawberries!"
-Dark Helmet

"what the hell was that.
spaceball one... they've gone to plaid"
-barf and lone star

"an anti-chop mechanism for a spyder is like viagra. its great if you need it, but what its modifying still sucks."
-me in response to some kids request that i design the above mention ACM

"OK, so youve got a spyder that you havent lubed in a year and its starting to leak everywhere. ill tell you what ill do, you send me 300 bucks and ill send you a mag."
-me again, this time in response to a plea for me to fix a spyder. (if you couldnt tell i hate kingman)

[spyderkiller]

"Like a fat chick in a dodgeball game, I'm out." -Me
"Our guns are $400 shinier than yours" -WDP

I like the first one I put! hahaha

[Jon/xpm]

here i try for a quote~!

why tho kill people for
useless matter and not let them
flurish there life with joy and happines

[ronron2112]

"The government kills people, who kill people, to prove that killing people is wrong."

"Cowboy wisdom: never squat with your spurs on."

"If you can read this, you're in second place."

"i'm not afrid to go fast, it's crashing and burning that sucks!"

"Famous Last Words: Are you sure the power is off?"

"People never say 'It's only a game' when they're winning."

"Teenage girl: When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' don't answer him."

"Never use while sleeping" -Inscrutions on a hair drier.

"If quitters never win, and winners never quit, who came up with, 'Quit while your ahead'"?

"I know the best things in life are free, but why do the next best things cost so much?"

"I finaly managed to get some powdered water, but i do not know what to add" -Steven Wright

"Famous Last words: HEY! thats not a violin case!"

I'll post more if you want me too! i have like 34599126059340912 of these :)

[Jonno06]

"What doesnt kill you,only makes you stronger,
What kills you,makes you dead"

Post more RonRon

[ronron2112]

allrrrrriiiiigggghhhhttttttttttt..... do i rerally wanna put you through that torture?? but since i am soo nice, i'll post more!

"If the shoe fits, find another just like it."

"A closed mouth gathers no foot"

"Famous Last Words: That's odd"

"If you have melted chocolate on your hands, your eating it too slowly"

"Never argue with a fool; he may be doing the same thing."

"If it werent for electricity we'd all be watching TV by candle light." -George Gobel

"Chickens: The only animal you eat before they're alive, and after they're dead."

"Famous Last Words: let it down slowly!"

"Why are wrong numbers never busy?"

"A penny saved is not much" -First Grader Philosophy

"When companies ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?"

"The time to repair the roof is when the sun id shining." -JFK

i'll post more later.. its time for bed, i gotta work tomorrow

[TylerDurden]

"The will to win isn't everything...It't the only thing."

--Lombardy

"Where's the beef?"

--Dave Thomas

"If i knew what i was doing, i probably wouldn't be doing it."

--Tito Jackson

[sniper1rfa]

before you judge a man, you should walk 2 miles in hi shoes, because then you will be 2 miles away and you will have his shoes.

P.S. never judge a man smaller than you, or you will get callouses on your feet.

[joeyjoe367]

"winners never quit, quitters never win; but those who never win, and never quit, are just stupid"

"not all pain is gain"

[MagMan5446]

"Judge not lest ye be judged yourself."

[clockworkmiller]

"See, that's why I pushed the green button. Nobody ever dies by pushing the green button."

[MajorDamage]

Lets do some of my T-shirts now lol :D
"You say Psycho like its a bad thing"
"I Fling Poo"(with a picture of a monkey :D)
"Never Underestimate the power of Stupid People in Large Groups"(someone posted something basically the same as this also)
"I'm a People Person, Now Leave Me Alone"
"AGD, Because Quality Always Shoots Straight" (lol, had to put this one! :D)
"Sin, It's a Downward Spiral"


ENDO!