Have you ever received unwanted advice on the field?

[Loneassassin]

I had a moment on the field yesterday that kind of bothered me, not just due to what the guy said to me but my reaction to it.

It was 3 on 3 rec speedball, and I hadn't played for close to 3 months. We randomly broke up the teams, and I ended up with a friend of mine (only his 2nd time playing, and he had to borrow my mech Autococker, which as you know, is not always the first choice for a beginner). My other teamate was a so-so player, but he and I had never really played together before. Two of the guys on the other team were pretty good, and I'd never seen the 3rd guy before. He turned out to be considerably better than them. But anyway, I didn't worry about any of that, and was excited to play.

So the first game, my friend forgot to take the safety off, then finally asked me what was up and I was able to sort that out. Then he stepped out into an incoming paintball. We lost.

Next game, he played his whole 2 minutes with his loader off, so no paintballs were leaving his gun. Then he stepped out into an incoming paintball. We lost.

It was all kind of funny. In a 3rd game, he went out immediately again, and you guessed it, we lost again. The other guys were tough enough we just couldn't do much with the two of us.

Anyway, I don't like losing 3 in a row. Granted, it's just rec ball, but I just don't like to lose like that. Then, the guy I didn't know walked up and told us we need to talk more on the field, we need to communicate. I didn't say anything to this but I (regrettably) gave him what was probably an icy stare.

I felt like saying "excuse me, but who are you and have you been playing for 18 years? I know what went wrong, and I know how to play paintball, thank you very much." Fortunately, I didn't say this.

But, back to the point, was I right to be angry? I have been playing for 18 years and have always analyzed my playing with a fine-toothed comb. I am confident facing anyone, anytime. I'm not saying I'm a perfect player by any means, but I usually do quite well no matter who I'm playing against. I think maybe this is partially MY problem in that I need to just shrug it off, but also a little his problem by offering advice that was not asked for. Perhaps it was just the way he said it - in kind of a patronizing tone - that rubbed me the wrong way.

Your thoughts? Am I off-based? Please discuss. :cheers:

[shooter311]

I'm not saying you were wrong, but I don't see what the guy did wrong. I am always open to criticism, it makes me a better player.

As you stated you never met the guy before, so he probably watched you and your friend who was trying to figure out the safety and why having a hopper maters (I'm still confused as to why they do), and figured you guys were starting out. There is no way he could have known that you have been playing for 18 years, or that you were good if he just watched you lose 3 straight games.

I don't mind giving or receiving tips, it's a completely different view from the sidelines. Unless he was telling you that you play blindfolded, you might want to listen. I usually say "thanks for the advice" and walk off if the guy is spouting crap I already know (which is inevitable since I know everything :tard: ).

[behemoth]

There will always be smack talkers on a paintball field, but the guy just said there needed to be more communication.

I -always- tell my teammates that during walk-on play.


Nothing is more frustrating than playing with a buncha dudes who dont talk, and just stand there and shoot at things. Theres a reason communication is a huge part of the sport.



Sounds like you got butthurt from some young buck telling you to give him some info. You've been playing for 18yrs, so what? Is that supposed to mean you're good?

[Loneassassin]

There will always be smack talkers on a paintball field, but the guy just said there needed to be more communication.

I -always- tell my teammates that during walk-on play.


Nothing is more frustrating than playing with a buncha dudes who dont talk, and just stand there and shoot at things. Theres a reason communication is a huge part of the sport.

I realize. When I play with people I know, there's plenty of communication. And in this case, there WAS communication, I don't know how someone on the other team could say there wasn't. Our third guy was basically out of the game immediately on each game.



Sounds like you got butthurt from some young buck telling you to give him some info. You've been playing for 18yrs, so what? Is that supposed to mean you're good?

That's probably right. And yes, after 18 years, I feel I'm a pretty good player. One thing I left out was that this guy was making other little comments all day; "know-it-all" types of comments. It kind of rubs me the wrong way...

[stevewar]

That's probably right. And yes, after 18 years, I feel I'm a pretty good player. One thing I left out was that this guy was making other little comments all day; "know-it-all" types of comments. It kind of rubs me the wrong way...
my .02 is that if you're old enough to have been playing for 18 years, then you're mature enough to say, hey buddy, thanks for your concern, but I'd appreciate if you'd keep your comments to yourself.

[Hobbez]

Nod, smile, and say "ok", "alright", or "I got ya"

Just by being polite and acknowleging the comment will make people remember you as cool, open and levelheaded, even if you completely ignore what they said. You don't need to follow the advice, just let them know you heard it. I've been playing since the mid 80's but, I play very carefully, slowly, and conservatively. I get unwanted advice about being more aggresive and moving more and shooting more almost every week from kids who love to run and jump shoot $300 a week of mommy's money. I nod, smile and simply say "ok" and continue to play the way I like to play. Afterall, I forked out my munnies to be there too.

A little polite goes a long ways, even if its only skin deep.

[Pudgey51]

im guessing the guy u didnt know who offered his opinion was on the opposite team? if so, i kinda see it as guys in the gym. ur doing ur workout, u know what ur doing but still the bean pole doing curls in front of the mirror walks over and tells u to do ur workout this way when what ur doing is right and works. i just shrug it off thank him for his opinion and let him go away. u know how to play, u know what was going on, but im getting the feeling this guy just wanted to help out maybe. i understand the frustration after losing three in a row but id say shrug it off and paint him up next round :D

long and short, dont beat urself up, u didnt say anything to ud regret just gave him the evil eye...

[Loneassassin]

im guessing the guy u didnt know who offered his opinion was on the opposite team? if so, i kinda see it as guys in the gym. ur doing ur workout, u know what ur doing but still the bean pole doing curls in front of the mirror walks over and tells u to do ur workout this way when what ur doing is right and works. i just shrug it off thank him for his opinion and let him go away. u know how to play, u know what was going on, but im getting the feeling this guy just wanted to help out maybe. i understand the frustration after losing three in a row but id say shrug it off and paint him up next round :D

long and short, dont beat urself up, u didnt say anything to ud regret just gave him the evil eye...

Yes, that's exactly how I took it, lol - he didn't tell me anything I didn't already know. And I would have painted him up, but the next couple of games we switched up teams and we were on the same team, then he left shortly after.

However, when I switched to my pump gun he did criticize my use of a Winchester 50 rd. hopper, citing that he felt no reason not to use his Rotor on his pump; that he had no trouble snapshooting with the extra weight. Overall, I just feel the guy had a need to affirm his knowledge and opinions a little too hard.

But as some of you have suggested, it would be the best approach to just smile, nod, and thank people like that for the advice - and then completely disregard them. Sometimes that's hard for me to do, lol.

[Pudgey51]

However, when I switched to my pump gun he did criticize my use of a Winchester 50 rd. hopper, citing that he felt no reason not to use his Rotor on his pump; that he had no trouble snapshooting with the extra weight. Overall, I just feel the guy had a need to affirm his knowledge and opinions a little too hard..


yeah now he just elevated his status to PITA...hes just one of those guys that needs to assert his skills to everyone....u did good brother...just carry on and show him whats what next time :shooting:

[Ando]

I would have just held up my marker and said "older then you...move along" I would have definably been the A-Hole that day. :cheers:

[behemoth]

That's probably right. And yes, after 18 years, I feel I'm a pretty good player. One thing I left out was that this guy was making other little comments all day; "know-it-all" types of comments. It kind of rubs me the wrong way...

Ah, that makes things a little different.

Kids will be kids...

[zondo]

Reading your post, I can empathize with your frustration.

Two things:
1) You and the guy don't know each other. You can't joke with someone you don't know and giving advice to someone you don't know can come off snobby.

2) No one likes getting advice right after getting smoked in a game... especially by the other team.

He'll learn.


I would have just held up my marker and said "older then you...move along" I would have definably been the A-Hole that day. :cheers:

And if he didn't walk away, there would have been a heart punch involved. :eek:

[leloup]

I've had people flat out order me to go some where or do something in large games before, and I feel your pain. I ignore and do my own thing with my group. If you don't even acknowledge that they are there, they'll get the hint eventually. When they talk, you talk over them to your buddies.

[BigEvil]

Reading your post, I can empathize with your frustration.

Two things:
1) You and the guy don't know each other. You can't joke with someone you don't know and giving advice to someone you don't know can come off snobby.

2) No one likes getting advice right after getting smoked in a game... especially by the other team.

He'll learn.



And if he didn't walk away, there would have been a heart punch involved. :eek:


Or, the double-middle fingers followed by the kick to the gut and Stone Cold Stunner.

[Tropical Life]

MY pet peeve is the bystanders in a game telling you what to do during a game and giving away your position. Besides that you can say what you want I will just want to shoot you even more.

[Courgar Hunter]

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
I like this buuuut.

Whenever someone comments on your playing skill level you throw up a defenesive position and either tell them off like your top dog or you smile and throw up a hand by saying thanks now go F yourself.

I was reffing today which felt great and a guy tried to tell me that a kid was blind firing as I pull him out after he was hit he continued to argue with me I told him very politely and calm as can be to please exit the field and we will discuss it after the game, he didn't like that option and proceeded to put his hand on me well you would think " Courgar hit the mofo " no I asked him to take his hand off of me and exit the field or I would escourt him off the field and out of the building as he continued to argue, I got a wonderful FU and we will see about that. needless to say the gentleman changed his tune very quickly as he saw I was not a highchool kid that he could push around.

Back on track people will tell you what they have to say either tacfully or not take it with a grain of salt, but once the FU's come out I always call it a day because I am ready to brawl.

[OPBN]

I think the guys intentions were good, perhaps just bad delivery. I've learned that some people just lack very good communication skills. They mean to be helpful, but due to their personalities they come off as know it alls. I think I fall into that category at times, and have tried to improve. I try to be helpful to what I think are new players when I can. Sometimes I look back on what I said and realize it could have been taken differently than I meant. Accept the fact that the guy was just trying to help and maybe it was his way of trying to open up dialogue with you and maybe making friends. If he stopped giving advice after you were on his team perhaps he realized he put his foot in his mouth when he was giving you advice and it's why he didnt hand out any more. People screw up, it happens.

Along these lines I had a slightly funny situation with a know it all. I was using my custom anoed E-mag in a scenario this weekend and had a kid I would judge to be late teens walk up with his younger sidekick and comment on how much he loved my Mag. I thanked him quietly as I tend not to like to draw a lot of attention to myself and waited for the game to start. He then proceeded to talk to his friend about the Mag and explain to me how he was trying to teach his buddy about old guns. He turns to his friend and asks him where he thinks the safety is for the marker. I oblige and show his friend the marker, swiveling both sides so he can get a good look at it. The buddy points to the selector switch and his mentor says "wrong" and points to the battery pin. He then goes on to explain to his friend from his vast knowledge of Mags that the battery pack is where the board is. I look at him for a second or two waiting for him to correct himself and when he doesn't explain that he actually pointed to the battery pin that cuts the power source from the battery to conserve power, that the board is in fact in the frame, not the battery pack, and that I actually don't have any safety since it was taken out due to overstripping during the ano process. I had the words "maybe I should teach you something about old guns" on the tip of my tongue when he quckly changed the subject.

I think I actually heard a snicker from his sidekick.

[cockerpunk]

I had a moment on the field yesterday that kind of bothered me, not just due to what the guy said to me but my reaction to it.

It was 3 on 3 rec speedball, and I hadn't played for close to 3 months. We randomly broke up the teams, and I ended up with a friend of mine (only his 2nd time playing, and he had to borrow my mech Autococker, which as you know, is not always the first choice for a beginner). My other teamate was a so-so player, but he and I had never really played together before. Two of the guys on the other team were pretty good, and I'd never seen the 3rd guy before. He turned out to be considerably better than them. But anyway, I didn't worry about any of that, and was excited to play.

So the first game, my friend forgot to take the safety off, then finally asked me what was up and I was able to sort that out. Then he stepped out into an incoming paintball. We lost.

Next game, he played his whole 2 minutes with his loader off, so no paintballs were leaving his gun. Then he stepped out into an incoming paintball. We lost.

It was all kind of funny. In a 3rd game, he went out immediately again, and you guessed it, we lost again. The other guys were tough enough we just couldn't do much with the two of us.

Anyway, I don't like losing 3 in a row. Granted, it's just rec ball, but I just don't like to lose like that. Then, the guy I didn't know walked up and told us we need to talk more on the field, we need to communicate. I didn't say anything to this but I (regrettably) gave him what was probably an icy stare.

I felt like saying "excuse me, but who are you and have you been playing for 18 years? I know what went wrong, and I know how to play paintball, thank you very much." Fortunately, I didn't say this.

But, back to the point, was I right to be angry? I have been playing for 18 years and have always analyzed my playing with a fine-toothed comb. I am confident facing anyone, anytime. I'm not saying I'm a perfect player by any means, but I usually do quite well no matter who I'm playing against. I think maybe this is partially MY problem in that I need to just shrug it off, but also a little his problem by offering advice that was not asked for. Perhaps it was just the way he said it - in kind of a patronizing tone - that rubbed me the wrong way.

Your thoughts? Am I off-based? Please discuss. :cheers:

yes you were wrong to be mad. pointing out problems and fixing them is how you get better.

if you dont want to get better, continue this attitude.

[WUNDERWAFFEN]

So you gave the guy a stare. No problem, it probably quieted him up for the most part. Its way better than saying a snide comment back or flipping him the bird.

Yeah I love it when the APG-commando kiddies offer advice like "dont forget to cock it" refering to my mag.

It just sounds like you had a Blahh paintball day. I hate those rides home where I think I wouldve been better off spending the $$$ on something else that week.

Really all that matters was that your friend that is new to paintball had a fun day.

Ahhh new players... I remember one time at Skirmish, me & group of all new players I brought were defending the castle. We were up on the ramparts being shot at from all angles. I look over to one of my buddies who is borrowing a mag- he was kneeling with the mag in two hands. One hand was holding the barrel (off of the mag) the other hand was holding the mag & he was looking in both ends of the barrel & the mag. I ran over to assist & get him back into the action- apparently his loader was empty & he was looking for balls. I have no idea what he was doing, lol.

[Loneassassin]

So you gave the guy a stare. No problem, it probably quieted him up for the most part. Its way better than saying a snide comment back or flipping him the bird.

Yeah I love it when the APG-commando kiddies offer advice like "dont forget to cock it" refering to my mag.

It just sounds like you had a Blahh paintball day. I hate those rides home where I think I wouldve been better off spending the $$$ on something else that week.

Really all that matters was that your friend that is new to paintball had a fun day.
.


Now that I've had a few days to think about it, I think I just let the stress of the preceeding week affect my behavior on the field. Even that day, I had planned to be at the field 4 hours earlier but couldn't get a landscape project done until noon, which had gone way over my time estimate as it was...(I own a landscape company and do all the work myself.)

However, the day did pick up. For some reason when I picked up my pump I started making things happen. :shooting: And my buddy did have a good time - he never actually short-stroked my Autococker, and by the end of the day shot me and a few other people once or twice. He even attempted a run-through on a guy I was holding down, but unfortunately got shot in the process. But the important thing was he saw how teamwork could potentially play out. :cheers:

[Skeeter]

Anyway, I don't like losing 3 in a row. Granted, it's just rec ball, but I just don't like to lose like that. Then, the guy I didn't know walked up and told us we need to talk more on the field, we need to communicate. I didn't say anything to this but I (regrettably) gave him what was probably an icy stare.

Sounds like the "guy" in question didn't do anything wrong. Just a bit of helpful advice, in his eyes. It's no fun to watch lopsided games, over and over...

I know you just lost 3 in a row, but you need to find the humor in the event, and respond with something like: "until my team mates learn how to use cover, that is the least of my worries" OR "until my team mates realize that the pointy end of the marker points away from their shoulders, talking isn't going to help".

Don't get mad at the guy. Sounds like he was just trying to help. He didn't know the whole story, or even part of the story... He just wanted to see your team do better.

[p_bpat]

The only advice I absolutely hate on the field is deadbox/sideline coaching. If someone
Starts sideline coaching me, I usually just ask them to stop.
The cold "you talking to me?" Stare usually works pretty well for other silly "advice" or questions.
Pat.

[Narizo]

I guess all it comes down to is what he trying to be nice or was he trying to be a ass? You cant fault a guy for being nice, no need to be a dick back. Even if you know what the issue is perhaps just have a conversation with him rather than a silent icy stare... seems like he was trying to be friendly and nice and you were kind of rude... just based upon your explanation. Paintball is or should be a social game, enjoy it either way...just my two pennies

[esperto96]

I must be that annoying guy that dispenses unwanted advice to newbies. I want to help. But the most important thing for an experienced player to do is make sure the new player has a good time. That way, they're more likely to stay a player. All those skills we try to teach. They come with time and experience. But if the new guy isn't having fun they'll never get the experience.

I understand the frustration, losing 3 games in a row, friend having stupid silly gun problems, someone trying to "help". I get annoyed when my first timer friends are having gun problems that are as easy to fix as turning off the safety or rotating a powerfeed plug. While you're helping them out with their equipment, you're both essentially useless to the rest of the team. I've been shot out while helping someone with an on-field problem. It annoys me to death.

The trick is to take a deep breath and not sweat the small stuff. Everything in paintball is small stuff. It's just a game. You have good games and bad, good days and bad. I hope your friends come back again and again you have many days better than that one on the field together.