moral dilema here...

[warpfeedmod]

What would you do if a "friend" (and I use the term loosely now) owed you $1300 and you had his/her paypal password and could easily send yourself the money?

This "friend" doesn't return calls for the past month, doesn't reply to emails, and I never see them online on ICQ anymore. I've left numerous messages for this person on their mothers voicemail, I havn't said that he owes me money, but I've just said that it's urgent that he return my call.

The question I pose is this, seeing as this "friend" doesn't return calls or emails or IMs, I'm guessing he no longer wants to be my "friend". Do I go into his paypal account and send myself the $1300 and log out and never hear from him again? I can't take it up with police really because I paypaled him the money and there's no proof there was supposed to be any transaction.

I am temped to transfer the money, and then leave him a voicemail telling him since he didn't do it I took the liberty of doing it for him and leaving it at that. If he chooses to return the call then I can have it out with him, if not then I Guess I get my money back? My question is, can he do anything to me to say I "stole" the mony from him?

[LawFox32]

does he live near you?, can you go kick his butt, call his mom and tell her that he owes you money and that you are going to call the police if the money is not returned, but no don't do the Paypal thing, it will probably get you in trouble

[Mango]

threaten to take them to small claims court. so long as you know where this friend lives, you can contact the authorities close to him and have some sort of action taken. Most times you can get something done that way.

[warpfeedmod]

I'm in Illinois, he's in Connecticut.

I just sent an email to two of his friends and asked that they have him contact me.

Is small claims court really worth $1300 or would it cost me more to deal with calling the authorities there and getting all this straightend out.

I've been more then civil about this whole thing, I've accepted his excuses and all, but now to not return calls after a month is one thing. I went so far as to leave voicemails pretty much every day for a week a while back. I didn't say what they were about, just that I needed him to call me.

[warpfeedmod]

edit: Okay I just checked my paypal records, it's actually $1500, one payment for $1200, and another for $300.

I can see the reasoning behind not going into paypal and sending it from his account to mine, I guess that's not an option.

Is small claims court really worth $1500? I mean what do I have aside from teh paypal records. Can I take it up with paypal? I mean they have his info as far as bank aco**** info etc..

[Will Wood]

Do it. It is your money, after all. If there is a major problem and he needed that money, and was going to give you yours back latter, make him sign a contract and give it back.

[EsPo]

would the round trip plain ticket from illinois to connecticut cost more than 1500$? say it cost 1000(just bear with me) would seeing him all bloodied up be worth 500$. i think it would:D

[Mango]

It may take a while, but if you file a complaint with the authorities and can give them ample proof that he owes you the money, then they can help you and it won't cost you a thing. But, if you want to just take it out then do what you see fit. I'm just saying, going through the LEGAL channels is always your safest bet.

[Thordic]

I'm not going to tell you WHAT to do, but I'll tell you what to do if you choose a particular course of action.

Sending yourself the money from PayPal wouldn't be particularly "legal", so you should be careful about that approach if you go that route.

Do it through a proxy server (there are a few available online) if possible, or at the least a public computer, and do NOT leave him a voicemail admitting your guilt in the matter.

[magman007]

thordic, you are the most evil person i know!

Dude, if you are going to do it, why would you give him recorded evidence that you did it? that is asking for you to go to jail, and never see that money again. also, may i ask waht you bought? i know it inst my business, i was just wondering

[pbstu]

i wouldnt suggest going thru a proxy or anything, unless you can find one that really is annonymous, cause almost all proxys keep records and stuff, and all the cops have to do is follow the ip's back to you, and then your busted. now whether the cops can be bothered to that and whether theyre intelligent enough to do it is another matter.


stu.

[dansim]

well for the right amount i could do a road trip and "re arrange" his schedule, so he can see fit to contact you im in cape cod man, only 3 hours

[Snewk]

Dansim sounds like one of those mafia guys that does kneecappings and such for a small amount of money.


Don't just take it out of his paypal account, I know I couldn't do it to anyone I know or don't know. See if you can contact one of those friends and have them talk to him about it. Push comes to shove go to small claims court and get your money.

[paint king]

I think you know the answer about the paypal thing. Although it seems tempting it is not the moral thing to do.

First try and get ahold of his parents. If that fails then file some sort of charge.

Lastly if it really comes down to it. Although i am not condoning it if it comes to this then yes take it out of his paypal account (although it shouldnt go that far). Just make sure you do it carefully.

[Thordic]

Dansim lives in Cape Cod, I live one town over from where Tony Soprano's house is. Come on, really now...

[dansim]

<font color="red"><b>Mission:$1500</b></font>
"Taken out the trash."

"kay firsts i wants yous to get a garbage truck and take it over to them ritch b_____ds houses, out in conneticut, then i want you to pick up some "refuse" and dispose of it off a pier with his family watchin. then i want yous to meet my man Thordic out in jersey he has scuba divin shop tell him to get down there take em out and do it again until im tired, anyway i busy what you waitin for a kiss goodbye?"

*fade onto screen*

<b>CAPITOL CITY</b>

sorry been playin gta

[-Jôker-]

if it was me id just get the money through paypal :rolleyes: but i never make good decisions

[warpfeedmod]

Magman: I had originally sent him $1200 for a Bose surround system he was getting for me. He lost the job and claims that they charged his credit card the $1200 but never saw the item. He said he was dealing with the CC company to get the money back etc.

The $300 I lent him he used for a rental car when he went camping with some friends. He claims that the original rental he had broke down, they (the rental company) towed it and he was left without a car. he had to rent one ASAP to get where he was going and left all his Credit cards at home.

As it turns out he has one of them Paypal credit cards, so he asked that I paypal him the money so he could get the car. I did. I was able to check his paypal account and he did indeed spent like $250 on a rental the day I sent him the money as well as some other moeny for a towing service (I'm guessing to tow the other rental?) So that justifies the money I sent him for that at least I think?

Heh we had been friends for about a year before this, we'ld gotten along great. I emailed two of his friends last night, one of them replied and asked me to call him today. I'm going to call him on my lunch hour.

I'll keep ya posted. Thanks for the input :p


Oh pbstu, what about if I went to say a library in a neighboring town and did it from there? Most of the ones around here you just walk in and sign up a spot. Dont even have to give any info other then a name (could be Joe Schmoe for all they care). If they did trace it back it'd come to the library, and hundreds if not more people go through there daily.

Just a thought :p

[Marek]

Well, unfortunately, sometimes situations like this arise between friends and its never an easy problem to fix or figure out. And as much as it is not ur fault, ppl will take advantage of these little loopholes. One thing that I have learned is always get the person that u r dealing with (friend, family, gardner) to sign a paper stating what the transaction is, terms of the agreement, and when it should be completed. It doesnt take a long time to write up, and shouldnt be a big problem. If the person thinks that it is not necessary, then i would suggest dont do business.

Now, unfortunately that is something that u will have to think about next time, cuz as of now, u cant do that. I wouldnt do the Paypal thing. Vengenance has and never will solve ur problems. All that is goin to create is more tension and problems. I no, $1500 is alot of money and it is, Im sure very tempting to just "take the money back." Its not that simple now. The law is grey (at best) when it comes to civil matters, (which this is) so takin it to claims is probably ur only bet. Besides legal action that could be linked to u for "taking the money back," he could do far worse. And the scariest thing about all of this, is that this might be a $1500 lesson that teaches u not to trust friends. And that is something that doesnt have a price tag, trust and honesty. Its a bumpy road, but this is not something that should be done in haste. I would think about this long and hard before taking any drastic actions. Good luck in ur problem, and be careful.

Marek

[Tron]

Originally posted by Thordic
I'm not going to tell you WHAT to do, but I'll tell you what to do if you choose a particular course of action.

Sending yourself the money from PayPal wouldn't be particularly "legal", so you should be careful about that approach if you go that route.

Do it through a proxy server (there are a few available online) if possible, or at the least a public computer, and do NOT leave him a voicemail admitting your guilt in the matter.

Proxy wouldn't work anyway the money still has to go to him some how. If you really think it's to much trouble to send yourself the money or sue him. Order $1,500 worth of adult toys and have them sent to his house. Make sure its nothing he would enjoy though otherwise it would be worth it. :D

-Tron

[rhetor22]

Well going into a library is somewhat pointles... You are still transfering the money to your bank account...

[Thordic]

Originally posted by rhetor22
Well going into a library is somewhat pointles... You are still transfering the money to your bank account...

Well I realize that, but at the very least you don't want to make it EASY on them.

If you used a proxy, you could claim he sent it. "I got the money, and assumed he decided to pay me, officer. I don't know why he is saying he didn't mean to pay now."

You people aren't devious enough.

[TheTramp]

If you take the money out of his account you will be guilty fo several felonies. Theft (I'm not sure if it's enough for grand larceny), fraud (when you pretend to be him), and then there is the federal charges that come into play seening as how you are in different states. It dosen't matter that he "owes" you the money. Do you have a recept? Can you prove that he was supposed to give you anything? Even if you have all these proofs, you can/will be arrested and possibly do some jail time if you steal the money because you still commited a crime.

I'm not saying that you don't deserve to get your money back but do yourself a favor and don't steal it from something as traceable as a computer PayPal account.

Granted, if you do steal the money he might not say anything because he did owe you. Personaly, I'd have you arrested for raiding my account. If I was a jerk enough to not pay you back I'd be a jerk enough to turn you in.

[845]

http://www.judgejudy.com/assets/global/nav_logo.gif

[warpfeedmod]

hows about doing something as simple as changing his password in paypal? Just to mess with him? I know he uses it frequently when ebaying and whatnot.

Maybe change the contact email addy so he can't get the new password emailed to him?

I dunno, I got an email from him the other day as well as from him friends whom I emailed. We've talked about it and everything seems to be okay for now.

Simple misunderstanding as well. I jumped the gun and thought he was ignoring me, he wasn't aware that I was trying to contact him. He's been away at school 'till the 21st he claims. Some sort of freshman thing? I dunno it's been 10 years since I was last in school so could be.