parents are divoresing

[Black_Dragun2578]

Hey guys i wanna know what u guys would do if your parents got a divoris/planing on it

cause my parents are getting a divorse it kinda sucks but my mom has been a real b**** lately

[Blazestorm]

I would go with it, it is their decision not yours. Although it affects you, they were the ones who got married and brought you into the world, although you should have a say, it's their decision.

Don't do anything to make things worse, k? :D

[Russ]

That's too bad, maybe they can work things out?

FWIW, I got divorced when my son was 2 (he's 20 now!) He lived with his mom 'till he was 15, then came to live with me. We were always very close, but at times it's been hard.

Best wishes

[Black_Dragun2578]

k thanks guys

[blembiggity]

i was 10 when mine got divorced and it hurts for a bit but if the parent who u live with is a good parent u will grow up to be the man or woman u should be even without the parent. good luck

[SpongeBobSquarePants]

My parents got divorced about 8 years ago. I have been to countless lawyers and through countless cusstoide (sp) battles. I now live with my mom, and see my dad when ever i fill like going up there. I used to see each a week at a time but my dad moved to far from school so i don't see him as often. I assume you kinda of understand whats going on. Try being 7 and haveing no clue whats going on except your dads leaveing. Now thats tuff. But still best wishs to you bro.

[Black_Dragun2578]

hmm thanks guys

i see alot more parents getting a divorse these days

i dunno why

[SpongeBobSquarePants]

Yea its like only 1 in 4 or 2 in 5 couples that stay together its pretty sad.....

[Xerces]

im sure they both love you, just let them know how you feel about the situation, and with any luck they might work it out

[Fatjon]

Man that sucks to here. Im glad i was to young to know what was going on when my parents got divorced

[-=Squid=-]

Originally posted by SpongeBobSquarePants
My parents got divorced about 8 years ago. I have been to countless lawyers and through countless cusstoide (sp) battles. I now live with my mom, and see my dad when ever i fill like going up there. I used to see each a week at a time but my dad moved to far from school so i don't see him as often. I assume you kinda of understand whats going on. Try being 7 and haveing no clue whats going on except your dads leaveing. Now thats tuff. But still best wishs to you bro.

LOL, that sucks man...when my got divorced when I was 5, I didnt care because I was retarded...all I knew was one left, and he gave me a power tool (drill) lol....

[-Carnifex-]

I'm happy for you man.

[Black_Dragun2578]

lol

squid your sotry is pretty funny

[-=Squid=-]

Originally posted by Black_Dragun2578
lol

squid your sotry is pretty funny

lol, I always drilled hole in...ahem...everything, I feel it was appropriate :D

[Black_Dragun2578]

lol squid u just made my night

[Restola]

my patents got divorced when i was like 8, i was going ti revere aschools and that is close to you. pm when i am not drinking and we can talk and if you watn. i hate when pther people post whe drunk, but then im do it, im sorry guys :) by enow

[SpongeBobSquarePants]

Originally posted by Restola
my patents got divorced when i was like 8, i was going ti revere aschools and that is close to you. pm when i am not drinking and we can talk and if you watn. i hate when pther people post whe drunk, but then im do it, im sorry guys :) by enow


Occifer I swarz to drunk I'm not God.:p

[-=Squid=-]

Originally posted by Black_Dragun2578
lol squid u just made my night

Well I am glad that I did, and jeeze...my piccie in my sig :(

[Black_Dragun2578]

hmm cool squid

REstola where do u live now?

[The Frymarker]

Well Black,

No matter how old you are when parents divorce it takes a toll on you. I was 18 when my parents were separated. I always took the brunt of there frustration, infact almost ended up to blows with my dad.

Parents become strange to when getting divorced, they become very hatefull towards each other. Which is strange because at one point they did love each other. My husband and I say to each other how do you fall out of love with someone?

At any rate don't blame yourself it is not your fault. Things will get some what better in the future.

I don't know the personalities of your parents but my mother is an obsessive compulsive, she still freaks out when anyone mentions his name, when I go to visit with him I have to do it secretly or I'll never hear the end of it.

It has been 11 years since their divorce and to her it is just like yesterday.

[SpongeBobSquarePants]

Originally posted by The Frymarker

At any rate don't blame yourself it is not your fault. Things will get some what better in the future.



Well put. Now I am actually glad my parents are divorced. I mean at first it was **** but now its not that bad. It also has it ups birthdays christmas etc. ;)

[sparklie Chick]

My parents have been divorced 15 years and they are still scoring points off each other, the only time they are in the same building is court. They both got really silly, it was very vicious and yes it has put me off getting married. They blew every thing they had fighting each other 1/2 a million pounds spent on solicitors barristers and QC's, they are both now broke and I expect will remain that way. It's not nice watching them destroying them self’s, they were never really happy together, much as he *****es on my dad still misses my mum.

I didn't speak to my dad for 18 months but we now get on better than we ever did when we all lived together.
My mother was a complete liability during the year of solicitors and mass entourage to court for the hearings.

I don't know how old you are but this is not your fault they are the adults here. If they work it out then great if they feel that they can no longer stay together then this is there right, they are still your parents and parents love you what ever you do.

In hindsight my parents had a very nasty bloody divorce and I was there for my mother and it has affected my adult life I was 19 at the time. I was planning on moving out and travelling this never happened due to getting caught up in their mess. I could have moved out gone travailing and came back for the pieces or once the dust had settled this would have been way easier on me. But my bother was still at home and I would not have felt right leaving him to cope on his own.

My mother used to throw all my stuff out of the window every time I went to see my dad my brother just didn't tell her.

Any way too much about them I would suggest you let them do what they have to, tell them how you feel even if you have to write them a letter or an email. If life stayed the same it would get dull, they will both still love you and it is really important you keep talking to them even if they don't always feel like it. When I was at school I can only rember 1 girl whose parents were divorced now it's most people don't blame your parents life is hard and we all expect so much from our self’s and others.

Any way I didn't realize my soapbox had transatlantic powers so good luck keep safe and just rember it's not your fault. :)

[cphilip]

Well "Love" is a verb...its an action you chose to take or not. So it can easily be something that is seperated by material and emotional things in time. Facination and attractions wane and then it's down to wether or not you both are going to step in and do something about it or not. Sometimes its just best to part ways. You are I cannot judge their situation or needs.

Unfortunately not always each of them can do something maturely and the kids become pawns in the whole thing. That part is sad. But know this that there is something known as "Unconditional Love" and that is the love each parent instinctively has for his/her child. That cannot be severed and remains instinctive to the parent no matter what. In spite of what you see they will always feel the same about you.

Your job now is to not let them use you against each other. Stand your ground to not be a middle man early on and let them deal with their problems on their own. Do not take sides. Refuse to. Stay out of it as much as you can.

There are far worse things than Divorced Parents. And one main one is not having one at all. Dead or even non involved or missing parents. And even parents that are together but make everyones life miserable with their fighting and such that it would be better they were not together! So try and look on the bright side and stay nuetral on the matter. It's not the end of the world. No matter what, you still have them and they still love you.

[The Frymarker]

awww cphil that was so nice

[hitech]

Originally posted by cphilip
Your job now is to not let them use you against each other. Stand your ground to not be a middle man early on and let them deal with their problems on their own. Do not take sides. Refuse to.

This is REALLY important. They should NOT tell you ANYTHING about why they are divorcing. It is between them, and has NOTHING to do with you. Most states actually have a statute prohibiting either parent from making disparaging remarks about the other parent. So, in general, it is against the law for them to involve you in much of it. Can you tell this hits close to home?

If they try to tell you "stories" about they other parent just let them know that it is between them and is not appropriate for them to be discussing it with you.

Good luck. And remember, it has nothing to do with you. With any luck you will be able to keep it that way.

[Black_Dragun2578]

hmm ok thanks guys for al the info but i beleive the hardest part eventhough my parent have never divorsed till now i believe the hardest part is when my dad moves out because i barely got to spend time with him and my mom has been a real b**** lately and my dad is gonna be moving out in about a week so it sucks

[hitech]

Originally posted by Black_Dragun2578
[BThe hardest part is when my dad moves out because I barely got to spend time with him...and my dad is gonna be moving out in about a week so it sucks [/B]

YES, it sucks. It is going to get worse before it gets better. But, it will get better. I don't know how old you are, but you might want to consider letting your dad know that you WANT to spend more time with him. Heck, let everyone know. You have the right to equal access to BOTH parents. Let everyone know that you expect it.

I hope it doesn't end up being too bad for you. Divorce is never pleasant. I'm hoping for the best possible for you. :D

[Black_Dragun2578]

k thanks man