funniest thing a newbie has ever said to you.

[toolfan62]

post here what a newbie has said to you that was funny.

*edit-ok heres something,one time i was at my local field,and this newbie saw my black dragun and was like"is that a dark angel"i just looked at him,then he was like"i'll buy it off you for 100 dollars" me and my friends were rolling on the ground and he was like"what thats how much dark angels are":rolleyes:

[-=Squid=-]

It would have been nice if you said something to get it going :rolleyes: However, it wasnt said to me, I was reffing. This kid went to point blank (rec ball at our field the people have to call point blank) some other kid, and hes all "Surrender...or Ill blow you up!" It was funny as hell, all the refs were rolling.

[sneakyhacker420]

at my field there is the "Rambo Rule", you can touch someone on the other team and say rambo, and the person that you touch is qualified as a dead player, just as if he got shot

ok, heres the story


this new kid with a decked out scenario A-5 (remember, this is SPEEDBALL!)

he runs up to a friend of mine through a window and points the gun at him and yells "Freeze!"

my friend turns around and puts 6 rounds onto his neck, mask, and head

the newbie goes away whining and groaning *****ing about saying that the other player is supposed to give up if he says freeze


sorry kid, there is no rule about 'freeze', only the Rambo Rule :p


i was sitting out that game and saw the whole thing happen

me and the refs were just crackin up about it for the rest of the night... and the kid sat out for the last 2 hours of open play there :rolleyes:


this happened at BFG Paintball Park in GermanTown, Wisconsin

[personman]

Uhh.. I was walking around at DDay and some kid pointed to my Xvalve Micro E-mag and said to his friend 'Thats the gun I want! An Autococker!'
Heh I'm sure there are better ones out there..

[irbodden]

Kid has a Point Zero or whatever that piece plastic gun is

and tells me that he has a silver bullet in it that makes it shoot 200 miles per hour over the limit of 300.. but him and his friends are hardcore players...

:D

[-Jôker-]

'they showed me the guns G, they wussss for reeeaaal!'

[Python14]

I've had a few people ask if my Automag was "one of those guns that costed $7,000"

I've heard....
"nitrous"
"I'm out of bullets"
"Stop shooting at me, I think I wanna be out"
"Hey, He's got one of those new autoshockers(matrix)"
"A girl?"(in reference to lilsnowpixie)

and of coarse,
"Hey, cover me, I'm gonna sneek in a snipe their flag guard"

[Brak]

some TOTALY noob, talking to my friend about the new armotech scenario guns:

friend- "yeah dude they are awesome"
noob- "i know, did you know that they are really M16's turned into paintball guns"
"i dont think so, they are just made to look like 'em"
"no man i looked at them they are real guns but the shoot paintballs instead of bullets"
"then how does it shoot with co2?"
"i dunno"
"and how do the paintballs fit in it?"
"i dunno"
me- "you guys talking about the new WAG-75? its sweet"
noob, again- "dude its a real gun converted to shoot paintballs right"
me - "no."

he went on to argue his idea, but then after my friend and i switched the conversation to talking about cocker pneu's and technical stuff, he figured that we knew more than him.

[MantisMag]

"hey your mag (retro) is just like mine (E-mag) it's got the magnets in the trigger."

[Cryer]

"You must have a Frickin LaserSight on that damn thing! Ref! Check his gun! Make sure he soesn't have a laser sight!"
After I shot him through the center hole of a large wire spool.

So what if I had a lasersight? are they Illegal in recball, now?:confused:

[theraidenproject]

noob: (in reference to my Emag with warp): "is that a machine gun?"

[i_baked_cookies]

im at my local feild with my automag (with warp and intelliframe, sorta looks intimidating:D ), and this kid walks up to me

kid: dude, is that rifle a powerful one?
me: why yes, i blew a camels head off with it once!
kid: dude, no way!! i want one of those, what is it called?
me: artic warfare magnum [i was thinkin of cs]
kid: awwwww... awesome, how much do they cost!
me: oh, not that much... couple thousand maybe

this kid was like 4 foot 4, and he looked all weird

so i decided to be on the other team that he was on, and i knew exactly what i was going to do: i was going to bunker him!

so we started off, and i ran my arse off to get up to a center bunker... my teammates were good coverfire giver dudes. i go around to his bunker (he ran up with his shutter). I go around for the bunker move, and by this time, there was only him and another noob left on the feild. I point my mag into his chest (his gun is on the opposite side of the bunker) and i said: ill blow u away!! and then he let out the most girly scream ever, i could of died laughing and he could have shot me up so bad.... but instead, i let him yell and he surrendered...

well it was mean but i was doing so bad that day..


:eek:

[TransMan]

"Dude my Cousins friend shoots marbles in his gun i want some but there liek 100$ for a box of them"

I just said yup :D

[Lethargic]

all of these i hear all the time when i play with my warp feed.

"what is that?"

"is that thing full auto"

"why dont you have a hopper?"

"Ref!! he is cheating!!"

my favorite is when i brought out my pump gun and a 12ish year old kid with a electro spyder told me i sucked because i didnt have a spyder. He then went on to assure me that it was "the best gun ever."

newbies are fun:D

[FooTemps]

Okay, this place rents out mags...

newb: Is that a rental?
me: no, it's my mag...
newb: cool! it's better than the rental right? I mean, you play so much better than me. It's gotta be really custom.
me: not really, all I have is a better barrel and better hopper.
newb: wow! I've got to get myself an automag!

Yeah, I doubt he even heard what I said...

[Epyon]

Noob-"Hey, what gun do you have?"
Me-"An automag"
Noob-"You have an automatic gun?"
Me-"NO it is semi, just the name"

I get this question from alot of people who have never heard or seen an automag.

[Miscue]

"Do you know what Level 10 is?"

[AFRaven]

Talking to some of my cousin's friends here:

Me: So, what kind of gun do you have?

Kid: It's the best gun on the market, I bought it from [Bill] for 700 bucks.

Me: What, like a "decked out" Cocker? (sarcasm)

Kid: No.

Me: Oh, what is it then?

Kid: It's a totally tricked 98 Tippmann.

Me: Yes... I see.

Kid: I run it on 20 ounces of NOS.

Me: Like a 1.4 Liter Honda Civic?

Kid: Ummm.... no. Like a really good paintball gun.

At this point, I laughed at him and walked away.

[shartley]

"You are not how I imagined you would look."

;)

Oh…. This is suppose to be not just any player but new ones right? :D

[land hurricane]

It wasn't really a newb but when i was shooting my rt.

"Is that thing on burst?"

[bunkermaster10]

newb: "Dude your gun shoots so much farther than mine. I wish I had your gun." he was shooting a rental pro carbine.

[252]

PBR has a thread like this....right here....
http://pbreview.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=141103
over 400 posts and 10K views

[SpongeBobSquarePants]

Me holding my impy.

Noob-Dude that thing is awsome but you know what would make it better? a expansion chamber.

Playing speedball.

Noob-Dude were is you camoflauge?

[trev_pbller]

First day playing with my new rt at a friends house, this ones kind of old but...

Friend: Dude this is an awesome gun, ummm how do you cock it??

Me: Oh um you dont cock it dude, it pressurizes.

Friend: Shutup I knew that.

Or from another friend new to paintball

Friend: Dude, I'm gonna hate to get shot with that gun!!Does that nitrous make it shoot a lot harder??

I had to explain to him what nitrogen does and why u cant run co2 in an rt...this is good stuff lol :D

[Jonno06]

Them- what kind of gun is that?!
me-an automag.
them-an autococker..wow!..those are automatic!!!!!
me-*sigh*

[sneakyhacker420]

Originally posted by personman
Uhh.. I was walking around at DDay and some kid pointed to my Xvalve Micro E-mag and said to his friend 'Thats the gun I want! An Autococker!'




LMFAO

[Smoke]

Some n00b walked up to me an looked at my RTP, and said, "Hey man, nice Spyder!". I just gave him a blank stare, and he replied, "What? That is a Spyder, right?". I replied, "No.". Then, he said, "Well....is it an Angel?"
He obviously had never heard of an Automag, and when I asked him how long he had been playing, he said about 4 or 5 months.

[BobTheCow]

omg smee you are my HERO!!!

Well this one's actually pretty recent:

My friend's brother (he is SUCH a huge whigger, I think he's been at pev's the past couple weeks, maybe somebody's noticed him????) anyway he just got an A-5/RT setup, and was explaining to his sister (my friend) "yeah they modeled it after an oozie..."

[animal]

I always have guys telling me I don't play fair because I have a "clip" on my emag. (aka battery pack)AS if it'd hold more than about 8 balls if indeed, for matter of converstaion, it was a clip.

I've also had the warp equated to a "chain gun" haha.

And the intimidation of gillie suits are priceless when it comes to noobs. Amazing how many of them never played but seem to have first hand knowledge that the guys in the gillie suits are true to life navy seals. "No really dude, my cousin told me they are." :rolleyes:

It's always fun to tell them my emag is a rental.. just so they go and hassle my friends behind the desk for one of the "cool chain guns"

[-=Squid=-]

Originally posted by shartley
"You are not how I imagined you would look."

;)

Oh…. This is suppose to be not just any player but new ones right? :D

Alright lol....but you werent! You like like the gestapo in that pic! I imagine you as a hefty guy, thin glasses, and a helaciously huge mustache, no beard. lol. At least you threw in the "This is suppose to be not just any player but new ones right" or I woulda been worried! BTW, how did you ship that package? Its still not here.