"Because Quality Always Shoots Straight"

[J]

Smart parts (Impulse - Shocker): "One thread fits all (of the same gun). OR
Smart parts: "proving you CAN make a shoebox into a paintball gun"


Viewloader: "The Evalution was Brass Eagle's idea, we swear"
32 degrees : "Hey, we haven't copied that yet"
WGP: "It HAS to be good if it cost this much"
the Stingray: "And they said we needed threads"
BE: "We survived by clinging on (and bring down) successful companies"
Kingmann: "Our guns need more holes in them"

[FDB1]

Be:"Bore sizes....our paint has varied bore sizes all in one pack for your convinance"

lol! that is great!

[Bartleby]

WGP - "good from far, but far from good"
Kingman - "no, i'm sorry, we don't have ball breaks, we just have satchel charges that detonate in your chamber"
Angel - "we understand the need for compensation"
E-Mag - "the only gun with a right to an ego"
AGD - "Having trouble? Send your gun in and we'll replace everything including power tube, safety, trigger, regulator, all orings, and spaces at no charge. And ontop of that we'll throw in a few power feed plugs. ENJOY!"
Retro Valve - "get a warpfeed"
Warpfeed - "gravity just isn't fast enough"
PMI - "It's PMI not PMS damnit!!"
Tippman - "What? No we don't understand the flatline, we just know it works."
Challenge Park Extreme - "we pride ourselves on our cheesy movie-making abilities"
Me - "for your personal enjoyment"

[MajorDamage]

OK! I thought of more today!

AGD--We make reliable guns, and have great Tech Support.
WGP--Our guns are good after you upgrade them.
WDP--Our guns are expensive and electronic.
Smart Parts--We don't have very good tech support, and we make electronic guns.
Toxic Toyz--We are out of business.
Kingman--We make entry level markers, and have weird bottomline. We bought out Raven.
Tippmann--We make reliable entry level guns, with good tech support.
Brass Eagle--We make the Talon, Stingray, and other popular markers. We also bought out JT and Veiwloader.

LOL! I AM SO humorous!

ENDO!

[theraidenproject]

AGD: making back-up guns obselete since (whenever AGD started)

[dansim]

now the dye "stupid freek...."now that was funny
anyway

Agd- yeah its ugly but it makes a really cool clink,clink sound
wgp- well okay we found out how triggers are made they(whispering)whats that word again(talking) they pivot yeah pivot whatever that is
wdp- hey all you that have the pre lcd gun screw you
aci- well what if we make it shiny?
32* what if we add some stickers? howbout a hole or 2? hey now thats origanal
tippman- no you still cant buy the hellhound
cci- um were still in bussiness guys you know we sell guns and stuff
kigman- because theres never enough look alike markers made buy the same company oh and dont you love our offset pistol screw holes?

um thats all for now

[pito189]

WDP: "The Angel...now includes Satellite link up, and LO-Jack" [/B][/QUOTE]

Thats a good one.

The Angel...now with Windows XP standard.

[MJS1214]

tippman-why buy a cane AND painball gun?
tippman-we have a ATV with a paintball gun on it so there!
tippman-with a flatline barrel,the ball will go around the world and hit you in the back!
tippman-our guns shoot balls that can curve around a tree*
tippman-piss us off and well make another pointless add-on to the 98 custom!
WGP-ELVES RULE!
Boo Yaah-we make you spyder an angel minus the performance!
JAVA-we make spyders and sell them for an extra 20 dollars!
AGD-we made a tube with a grip frame actually WORK
WDP-we add a tv to your tank and a playstation2 to your gun




*that happened to me 1 time...
and no i actually DO like tippman they are just vulnerable!

[klb311]

WDP: Angels are better than Emags because, ummm, they like, cost more and stuff

AGD: If you can't see him popping up behind the bunker and yet you get railed by him, then yes, he was using a warp

[e21bgl]

[mykroft]

Eclipse; We make cockers not suck

WGP: We make fancy pumps
WGP: They work, just DFWI

Kingman: The Hyundai of the Paintball industry, Cheap Junk from the Far East.

Shocktech: Because Danny Love Says So
Shocktech: Danny Love's Cool, so buy his engineering samples.

ANS: Worse than Stock, Guaranteed.

KAPP: Prettier Than Stock, Guaranteed

WDP: 1 Case, 0 Kills
WDP: $2000 and what warantee?

Smart Parts: 'Cause Everyone needs a bigger bottle

ICD: 1/2 the Price, 2x The performance of your average Angel

MacDev: Make your bushy feel like an Angel too.

Crossfire: Making presets cool since 2000

AGD: We can afford to have gold plated warrantee, our guns don't break anyways.

DYE: It's cooler because the Ironmen use it, Really.

PTP: Breaking good designs since 1993

[absocountry2]

I think the best so far is the Kingman-Crap with a K

PMI- Pretty Much Insignificant

[Manuel_FZR]

Hey ... that´s really funny!
My favourite: WGP= Better distance and accuracy thru use of elves.

[MJS1214]

Originally posted by MJS1214
tippman-why buy a cane AND painball gun?
tippman-we have a ATV with a paintball gun on it so there!
tippman-with a flatline barrel,the ball will go around the world and hit you in the back!
tippman-our guns shoot balls that can curve around a tree*
tippman-piss us off and well make another pointless add-on to the 98 custom!
WGP-ELVES RULE!
Boo Yaah-we make you spyder an angel minus the performance!
JAVA-we make spyders and sell them for an extra 20 dollars!
AGD-we made a tube with a grip frame actually WORK
WDP-we add a tv to your tank and a playstation2 to your gun



*that happened to me 1 time...
and no i actually DO like tippman they are just vulnerable!

i like the above...and:We can afford to have gold plated warrantee, our guns don't break anyways.

[Bartleby]

you're not getting away with that one.

MJS1214 QUOTED HIMSELF

hee hee hee

[mykroft]

PMI: We do Blowbacks right!
PMI: Spyders that Work.

Tippmann: Bulletproof, Literally

AKALMP: Overpriced and under-pressurized

Sandridge: Angel Performance, Cocker reliability, the worst of both worlds.

Zap:Making Kingman look good

Palmer: Overpriced, Overengineered, overweight, and underperforming.

BE: We are Borg, prepare to be assimilated

Diablo: Guns with Gremlins

[MicrOMag]

Lol that Sandridge one is funny

[Vegeta]

Kingman Java= "Paint it purple and sell it for 20 dollars more!"

Bushmaster= "'Cuase everyone wants to live in the bush!"
BE= "Supplying gangs, poor people, and crackheads for over 6 years."

I cant say anything bad about tippmann... i own a 98. Never had any problems with it in 2 years. and about the custom... i wish i had one. No sending to the company to put in your RT or hacksawing trigger guards.. it really was a good idea they came out with it. And they dont charge that much more for htem.. maybe 25 dollars.

[_MaD_]

J&J - Better barrels through frying pan technology!
Brass Eagle - All your paintball gear are belong to us!
WDP - Paintball gun, pager, cell phone and now featuring wireless web access!
Smart Parts - You'll Freak when you see how much it costs!

[Bartleby]

"BE: We are Borg, prepare to be assimilated "

one of the best one's i've seen yet

[Drizit]

Tippmann RT: And you thought the Angel was spray and pry.
Tippmann: Because you never know when you will need a club in a paintball game.
Tippmann: What do you mean a switch for full auto or nothing is a bad idea?
Tippmann: Go ahead. just try and cross thread this.
ProTeam: Tubes? we don't need no stinking tubes.
ProTeam: We don't make the markers you already own, we make them smaller.
WGP: taking a good idea and making it way more complicated then it has to be.
WDP: Because the trigger shouldn't have to move for the gun to fire.
Cobra Angle: 1 colour anodizing and a trigger job you could do in 15 minutes is worth an extra $1000 right?
AGD: because everyone should have a gun designed by a rocket scientist.

ok it's late and I don't think I can come up with anymore right now.

[nutz]

WDP: 1$ gun, 999$ shiping

[nutz]

o just thought of this one...
WGP- the gun works untill you gas it up.
Proball- breaks on impact... of the bolt that is.
Diablo- paintballs hurt... lets make them hurt more!
Kingman- purple paint is better than grey!!!

[Vegeta]

Tippmann - We make large threaded barrels for really, really, fat fingered people that can't screw in a 20 turn spyder barrel.

Viper - We use 1/4 turn lock-in barrels for really, really, dumbasses.

Tippmann Flatline - New innovation - turn the gun sideways and shoot around trees.

Airstar Super Nova - Now Comes in white! (note: metal detector to find gun after you drop it in the snow not included)

Angel WDP - Now comes with OnStar* System!

"I just took my mag apart last night"
"Oh.. did that take long?"
"No.. but it took me 5 hours trying to fiqure how to put it back together."

[n1mr0d]

Originally posted by Vegeta

Viper - We use 1/4 turn lock-in barrels for really, really, dumbasses.

"I just took my mag apart last night"
"Oh.. did that take long?"
"No.. but it took me 5 hours trying to fiqure how to put it back together."

errr......AGD guns use the quarter turn and lock barrels, does that make us dumasses?....

and that joke about the mags is like not funny or true. it takes me 20 seconds to go from assembled to body, body rail, trigger frame, and valve.

[pbsj]

WDP "Because regular maintenance should cost 400 dollars"
WGP "Building Power forearms since 1993 "
SP "With turbo even a trained monkey can be your fatback"
Tribal "So ugly they could be a modern art masterpiece"
Tippman "Because everyone needs an entrenching tool"
Bruiser "Great Jugs err I mean Guns..."

[mac2k4]

hey n1mr0d none of it is true there justa jokin around. The reason ya can take it apart so quick is cause its only held by 1 screw

[n1mr0d]

Originally posted by mac2k4
hey n1mr0d none of it is true there justa jokin around. The reason ya can take it apart so quick is cause its only held by 1 screw

heh gotcha

[deded]

warpig: if you can't find it here, you most likely have brain damage

pigtv: look at all the angels!

brass eagle: why use metal when plastic is so much cheaper?

diablo: our commercials suck ***

WDP: buy our stuff so we can pay our web designers!

dye: buy our stuff so we can pay *our* web designers!

AGD: we only fix 'em for free because they never break

Warp Feed: its time to buy more paint

JT: Buy our $130 goggles and well throw in a fan for free!

[NikeMann]

BE - "you mean it's NOT suppose to break in the barrel?"

AGD - "cuz the gun has to work to be able to use it"

WDP - "price means everything"

WGP - "the more moving parts, the cooler it is"

Kingman - "add a new part to an old gun, and you have a whole different gun."

ICD - "send it in, we'll MAKE it work"

SP - "we make good barrels, as for the guns..."

DYE - "three letters can change a price"

Bob Long - "of course I ate paint chips"

32* - "what's a patent?"

KAPP - "it's so purdy..."

Tippmann - "suppose to be used in war, not in play"

Ricochet - "weed whacker technology"

ZAP - "leave us alone, we know we suck"

Diablo - "posessed"

J&J - "we know ceramic breaks"

JT - "making you stick out when you want to hide"

Warp Feed - "peek-a-boo"

VL - "dont you think the egg was original?"