FatMan's Guide to Paintball for Old Farts

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  • FatMan
    Fat Wang
    • Feb 2002
    • 926

    #1

    FatMan's Guide to Paintball for Old Farts

    FatMan's Guide to Paintball for Old Farts

    Back when I was a spritely 34 years old I got into paintball. As a newby I had a lot of important lessons to learn, the most critical of which were documented in "Walt's Thoughts on Paintball" (http://www.automags.org/forums/showt...threadid=17654

    Dirty old men need love too!
  • Dubstar112
    Dubstar111x
    • Feb 2001
    • 2321

    #2
    lmao-
    AO #765
    CCM Series 5
    Prerelease Impulse
    Hyperframed Warped Mag w/flatline tank
    Feedback.


    Good to know that somone of Tom's status seeks "relief" from a sport he helped create. A sport now ruled by a single patent.

    Comment

    • shartley
      • Jun 2026

      #3
      LOL Fantastic.... may I use it on another Site? I will of course give full credit. This is just too good to keep on one site... LOL

      Comment

      • FatMan
        Fat Wang
        • Feb 2002
        • 926

        #4
        Please feel free to share

        sure. tell the world. be sure to tell anyone who knows Phil!

        FM

        Dirty old men need love too!

        Comment

        • shartley
          • Jun 2026

          #5
          LOL Thanks.. and I will be sure to use this to my advantage next time I talk with him.

          Comment

          • cphilip
            Former Moderator

            • Jun 2026
            • 16216

            #6
            For those of you who do not connect the "Phil" he is referring to...its me! cphilip. This is Dr. Walt Ligon that has finally joined our ranks. I have referred to Walt many times as you know. He is my mentor, friend and he is my paintball Idol. He introduced me to Mags and he is responsible for me being what I am. Well partly! Walt can still play with the best of them. But only for a little while. He has a keen sense of Humor and extremely intelligent and a bit sick too! I hope he will stay around and share with us. Everyone please welcome Walt aka "Fatman" to the Forum.


            AGD, where we are so good we can do it with only ONE tube!

            cphilip.com

            Comment

            • Hexis
              Green Mag Freak
              • Sep 2001
              • 2427

              #7
              Cool! I don't feel so old as part of this sport at 27 now. Keep up the good work.

              Comment

              • shartley
                • Jun 2026

                #8
                Well.... I just showed this to Kim (my Wife) and she gives you the thumbs up. LOL It was the FIRST and ONLY thing I have shown her from AO that made her laugh (or that she even found remotely funny).

                I also just submitted it for Publishing as an Article on RumbleMe.com (I am sure the WILL put it up. ).

                Oh.. and sorry for not welcoming you before... WELCOME!

                Comment

                • Buckwheat
                  Registered User
                  • Jan 2002
                  • 36

                  #9
                  I can usually be walking normal by wed. after a sun. game.
                  Since I quit using a remote I found that an oxygen bottle fits in the 4+1 nicely.
                  The look on the face of a 20 yr old after he found out he was outgunned by a 40+ year old is priceless!
                  I can think faster than they can run.
                  I know how you feel FatMan. But I don't feel like an "Old Fart".

                  Comment

                  • Tunaman
                    Specialized AGD Tech

                    • Dec 2000
                    • 8643

                    #10
                    HAHAHA!

                    That has got to be the funniest thing I ever read. Hey Phil...You have your hands full with this guy! Sounds like a real blast! Welcome to AO Fatman! BUWHAHAHAHA!
                    Last edited by Tunaman; 02-17-2002, 05:28 AM.
                    Email me for low prices on ALL AGD Products and more. [email protected]
                    Tunamart

                    Comment

                    • bunkerking
                      YATTA!!!!
                      • Nov 2001
                      • 161

                      #11
                      hey fatman, I hope you don't mind but I put a little quote from that in my sig. That is hillarious! You are a funny guy.
                      2k1 Lockout Edition acid wash free flow cocker.
                      Originally posted by FatMan
                      4. Paintball underwear - they have everything else, why not underwear that absorbs sweat before it runs down my crack and won't ride up in my crotch rubbing a rash that lasts for days.
                      FatMan

                      Comment

                      • SprayingMango
                        i cant wait to blog this
                        • Feb 2002
                        • 4557

                        #12
                        LMAO!!! Thats GREAT! HAH!! Excellent article FatMan! And sorry I dident welcome you before! So..

                        WELCOME!!

                        Comment

                        • M-a-s-sDriver
                          Alcohol Fueled Brewtality
                          • Jun 2001
                          • 552

                          #13
                          GAG COUGH!!!!...
                          Jesus man that was funny. I just want to know when you saw my bunker-trip-on-face-move that you refer to. I have a copyright on that. I'm gonna go puke now, and hit the bowflex so that I get hungry, eat a lot and gain more weight.
                          Brent Jackson, PFB.
                          I don't practice anymore: I'm just good in a natural, vicious sort of way.

                          Will you please tell your boobs to quit staring at my eyeballs?

                          Comment

                          • InfinatyBPS
                            Dead Black Rose
                            • May 2001
                            • 2404

                            #14
                            ok... Im not an old man or anything but I also would like to see those things at the feild. Wow bigger jerseys and chairs wow, that would be great hehehe... Yes I know, i am fat and lazy
                            You smell like dookie... No really though.

                            Comment

                            • the JoKeR
                              Slightly disturbed member
                              • Dec 2001
                              • 565

                              #15
                              I've found a new hero!

                              You forgot a few things, though:
                              Use that credit card to buy the most intimmidating clothing you can find to keep the people that have actually never saw you play from coming after you! At 6'4 240 lbs., I've used this to my advantage more times than I want to (or can) remember.
                              Also, don't forget the Flex-All rub for the ride home (put it on in the car after you leave the field and feel free to cry from the pain at that time).
                              Cultivate a group of younger good players that you can hang out with. Even if you're too old (senile) to learn anything from them, they'll feel sorry for you and not light you up too bad.
                              the JoKeR

                              Tragically hip and criminally insane.



                              Now building the ultimate truck body kit. Click on the logo above for details!

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