need help with a moral decision

[jdev]

here goes guys.

while back i posted a thread that I started seeing this girl that I thought was wicked awesome. [click] weve been dating now for 5 months, and things couldnt be better.

she seems to be taking an iterest in my interest in paintball, mainly the fact that I want to get a featherlite viking.

now, here is my moral dilemma.. and to give you a bit of background.

me and her have the same exact personalities. same likes, same dislikes, we think alike, criticize people alike and think of the same things at the same time.

we cant come to a compromise on anything, both are rediculously bullheaded and stubborn.

for my birthday, she tried to buy me a plane ticket to san diego to visit some of my friends, because she notices i am happy most when i talk about paintball and san diego.

my mom talked her out of buying me that ticket, and i am kinda glad.

well, she's at it again, and wants to buy me the featherlite.

i REALLY want this marker, but morally, i dont think i could let her purchase it for me.

i know you guys re saying.. you fool, let her buy the marker.. if only it were that easy.

so, i now look to you, the AO army, the morally minded.. i need your opinions.

the only thing thats currently stopping her is the 2 mods i want done to it while JMJ has it.. she already knows I want sapphire blue

[Paintchucker]

Your decision...

It it your decision and should depend on how you feel about the girl. If you have been saving your $ for a new gun, what little "trink-it" are you going to buy her after she buys you the gun?

Relationships are give and take. As long as you are both satisfied with the relationship, then why not give each other presents. Now if it would cause her a hardship to lay out that much money, then you might want to reconsider but otherwise, go with it!

[jdev]

Re: Your decision...

Originally posted by Paintchucker
It it your decision and should depend on how you feel about the girl. If you have been saving your $ for a new gun, what little "trink-it" are you going to buy her after she buys you the gun?

thats the thing. i told her that if she bought me this, I would have to get her something in return. since i dont have money saved for this marker yet, i didnt plan on purchasing it until after january.

however, i told her I wanted to get her something, she told me no. she wont have it, wont hear of it. similar to my plight. i dont really want her to buy me this marker, though I do want it.

on the other hand, I already bought her xmas present, and its a gold necklace with a 1/4 carat diamond.. cost me a little more than a featherlite.

[Paintchucker]

Re: Re: Your decision...

Originally posted by joey d


however, i told her I wanted to get her something, she told me no. she wont have it, wont hear of it.

Don't under any circumstances fall for that trick.

[jdev]

thing about that is, shes serious. she would get upset. I tried to tell her that I would AT LEAST take her out to dinner somewhere nice.. she told me that i couldnt make her go anywhere..

[Konigballer]

dude I'm in your same predicament. My girlfriend wants to buy us tickets for a cruise cause she knows how much I always wanted to travel and she makes more money than me. I wont let her even though I want to. I dont think your dumb for not lettin' her get you the gun. My girlfriend just cant understand it, but its just how I was raised. I just cant except a gift like that or yours. Its not even the fact that she's a girl, its just that people in my family didnt give each other or other people gifts of that size cause we never had the money. It just feels to weird for someone to try and GIVE me something that nice without me having to do anything for it. I definetley know what your talkin' about.

[jdev]

Originally posted by Konigballer
dude I'm in your same predicament. My girlfriend wants to buy us tickets for a cruise cause she knows how much I always wanted to travel and she makes more money than me. I wont let her even though I want to. I dont think your dumb for not lettin' her get you the gun. My girlfriend just cant understand it, but its just how I was raised. I just cant except a gift like that or yours. Its not even the fact that she's a girl, its just that people in my family didnt give each other or other people gifts of that size cause we never had the money. It just feels to weird for someone to try and GIVE me something that nice without me having to do anything for it. I definetley know what your talkin' about.

thank you. i totally understand you and your situation too. i feel the same. not being able to do anything for her in return for such a great gift.

[tony3]

tell her you dont want anything for your birthday or something like that, and maybe she'll get it for you for xmas, then you give her the necklace and its all happy and everyone is drinking egg nog and having a jolly ol' time....now im just rambling...

[Torbo]

i know i feel so much better when i buy stuff for myself. I dont have too much, but i can say that i worked my *** off bussing dishes, so that the cocker, bike or whatever, is MINE, not something someone else worked for and gave to me.

[Splat]

Let her buy the marker...

But then you MUST spend a good chunk of money on her...


Trust me, she'll be thinking EXPENSIVE JEWELERY.

[dinger]

LET HER BUY IT FOR YOU :O

let her get it for you

why?

ill tell ya why. [storymode]

back when i was in 8th grade, i was SOO freakin in looove with this blonde girl. i mean i drooled for her, and she was night and day thought.

but one day, i got too crazy about her. and i got her this diamond necklace [yes expensive, dont ask how i got it. no, its not my moms]. i gave that to her, and she just melted. we weren't even going out anymore either lol.

but my point is if you love someone enough, you'll do stuff in spite of them being in existance.[/storymode]

so trust me, let her get you that. and at least sorta try to do something for her in return. this relationship shouldn't just be 1-sided with gifts

just be sure to give some good-lovin'

[pbcustom98]

.

i understand how u feel. im the same way. it feels much better knowing u worked hard for something and then bought it, instead of someone seeing how much u want it and then buying it for you. knowing how hard u worked for it gives u a sense of accomplishment. to me it would be an easy choice just to tell her no. if she gets it anyway, then i would get something for her even if she doesnt want it. she bought the gun when u didnt want her to, so do the same thing to her.

Daniel

[jdev]

Originally posted by tony3
tell her you dont want anything for your birthday or something like that, and maybe she'll get it for you for xmas, then you give her the necklace and its all happy and everyone is drinking egg nog and having a jolly ol' time....now im just rambling...

see, this is what i tried to do as well. my birthday was the 27th of last month. now, im a simple person. I didnt want anything for my birthday (as a matter of fact, I got my mom and my girl presents for my b-day.. they were a little suprised) i kept telling roxy, I dont want anything. you get it, fine, ill take it, but its in protest because I dont want anything. it ended up that we just got in an arguement about it, because we are both stubborn and bullheaded. my mom stepped into the equation, told me I was being an unfair *******, and I just said, rather than fight about petty things, just get me a present. (all i wanted was a card, if that).

she ended up buying me a fitted red sox hat, and a $100 g/c to Hot topic. my girl rocks the socks.

Originally posted by Torbo
i know i feel so much better when i buy stuff for myself. I dont have too much, but i can say that i worked my *** off bussing dishes, so that the cocker, bike or whatever, is MINE, not something someone else worked for and gave to me.

same here. im not big on handouts and such, even if its some holiday or whatnot when you should be handing things out.

Originally posted by Splat
Let her buy the marker...

But then you MUST spend a good chunk of money on her...


Trust me, she'll be thinking EXPENSIVE JEWELERY.

i already got her expensive jewlery for christmas. thing is, she is as simple as me. doenst want it, trust me, I tried for her birthday. this is one thing I like about her. I dont have to spend $1000's on her to keep her happy, but, something in the way I was raised said I gotta keep her way happy all the time.

Originally posted by dinger
let her get it for you

why?

ill tell ya why. [storymode]

back when i was in 8th grade, i was SOO freakin in looove with this blonde girl. i mean i drooled for her, and she was night and day thought.

but one day, i got too crazy about her. and i got her this diamond necklace [yes expensive, dont ask how i got it. no, its not my moms]. i gave that to her, and she just melted. we weren't even going out anymore either lol.

but my point is if you love someone enough, you'll do stuff in spite of them being in existance.[/storymode]

so trust me, let her get you that. and at least sorta try to do something for her in return. this relationship shouldn't just be 1-sided with gifts

just be sure to give some good-lovin'

i agree with the 1-sided-ness. but, for some reason, she doesnt. and on the subject of lovin... you havent read my website before have ya.. no problems in that department

Originally posted by pbcustom98
i understand how u feel. im the same way. it feels much better knowing u worked hard for something and then bought it, instead of someone seeing how much u want it and then buying it for you. knowing how hard u worked for it gives u a sense of accomplishment. to me it would be an easy choice just to tell her no. if she gets it anyway, then i would get something for her even if she doesnt want it. she bought the gun when u didnt want her to, so do the same thing to her.

Daniel

*agree* on the work hard thing. and it is still my intention to just go out and do for her, as she has done for me..

[Will Wood]

Let her buy it. Deal with the quilt.

[kosmo]

In my encounters with those of the female type, Ive learned something about them and their "gifts".


ITS A TRAP

If you simply cant resist, just watch your back man.... watch your back.