sweet noob meat shield

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  • tribalman
    Registered User
    • Dec 2002
    • 719

    #16
    Originally posted by punkncat
    I actually like when lots of kids go the way I go. I just take command, and have a group of pawns to use for locating the enemy from a safe distance.

    i hate when they follow me. i'm in my bunker, other team has no idea i'm there. just biding my time. then bam. wtheck? kid slides into my bunker. then his friend. they block me in. i can't shoot out either side, and of course they won't. so i try to get them to move again, i even completly cover them, still no movement. so i cover myself and run. they guess what happens? you're right! they follow me.
    e-mag 226
    flashed with 1.31

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    • tae
      Registered User
      • Sep 2005
      • 275

      #17
      Gosh guys... there was nowhere else to go. Someone said that they found a box of M&M's and with everyone there I was sure I was going to get left out. By then we had been surrounded and thought a "school of fish" strategy was our best bet.

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      • Pacifist_Farmer
        Registered User
        • Aug 2003
        • 740

        #18
        Originally posted by nastymag
        i use to play at that field, that would happen all the time, it was a little sad, all you had to do is find a bunker like that, and dump 1-2 pods into it...and wallah ..5-7 eliminations.

        Some of us can do that with only 30 balls, and in the end you still have new players who want to continue playing, rather than never playing again because someone shot the crap out of them.

        :)

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        • BigEvil
          www.BigEvilOnline.com

          • Feb 2005
          • 9333

          #19
          All Newbs need to be initiated.

          We came up with this idea around 1993. A bunch of us were playing at Skirmish in PA. It was a private group, some of us had our own gear, but most didnt. My friend Eddy (who to this day is still scared crapless about getting hit) and my brother Jamie were hiding out in some bushes. A small group of the other team comes by, but doesnt see them. Ed panics, jumps up and runs away screaming something I cant print. My brother ends up getting lit up. Im sitting about 50 yrds away on the floor cracking up. Next thing you know, there is Eddy running towards us like Shaggy from Scooby-Doo after hes seen a ghost. I recognize him, but the other guys on my side dont. "Is that one of them?" "YEAH, GET HIM" I said. hehehe

          It was pretty funny, but I guess you had to be there.

          So anyhow...

          Whenever we take someout out to play for the first time, we initiate them. All new players are scared to death of getting hit for that first time. So we take that fear away by pretty much giving them worst then they will get during a game.

          We make them put on their mask, take a walk of about 60 paces, then open up on them. (Not too TOO bad though) When he/she gets off the floor and stops crying we tell them that was far worst than anything you will get hit with while on the field.

          If they still want to play ( ) they usually turn out to be pretty good. A fearless newb is worth at least ten scared newbs.

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          • Jaan
            It's Pronounced *John*

            • Apr 2005
            • 1310

            #20
            Originally posted by nastymag
            i use to play at that field, that would happen all the time, it was a little sad, all you had to do is find a bunker like that, and dump 1-2 pods into it...and wallah ..5-7 eliminations.
            It was nice of you not to overshoot the noobies

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            • Hairball
              Cheese Ninja
              • Jun 2004
              • 251

              #21
              Last time I played there were four or five kids in one dorito.
              -?? tom dances with Markhoff
              -?? Markhoff dances tom back with some hookers

              PaintballChat.net

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              • slade
                Carpe Noctem
                • Apr 2004
                • 3442

                #22
                Originally posted by wanna-b-ballin'
                i think i counted ten in the picture i linked to. a few are kinda hiding.
                well thats woodsball. im talking about an entire team on a speedball field going to the same bunker. and i mean the ENTIRE team.

                although actually, the worst ive ever seen wasnt a 10 year old newb, it was the mother of a group of 10 year old noobs. she decided to play with them. she walk/jogged to a standup bunker off the break, and just stood there... 2 feet to the side of the bunker. she wasnt at all behind the bunker, she was completely exposed.
                xvalve, ule body, logic vert frame, WWA barrel
                68/30 PE nitro tank
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                • Jackel411
                  East Coast Anarchy...WHAT!
                  • Jan 2003
                  • 882

                  #23
                  GRENAAAAAAAAAAAAADE!!!!


                  Hehe....

                  Actually on busy nights at the indoor I work with we get Squid-Piles like that... There fun to mess with its like the civil war when you do run by's on them. That and its even more fun when they pile into a bunker with you being the lead guy in the bunker, all I do is hip check them into the lanes at watch the other panic hehe..

                  Im mean......... But its fun
                  Wild Geese - Coney Isand White Fish - ECA
                  ECAP - "Making players dreams other players nightmares"

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                  • deathstalker
                    Fnord!
                    • Jun 2002
                    • 1115

                    #24
                    Originally posted by wanna-b-ballin'
                    does you field have an infestation problem of beginers that have no idea what to do but pull the trigger?
                    You can get your beginners to pull the trigger? Mine just hide behind the bunker and won't even shoot!

                    I've seen worse. You should see the back bunkers on Badlandz' speedball fields during open games.

                    Need a new sig pic? Click here!

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                    • NigelF
                      Registered User
                      • Feb 2005
                      • 102

                      #25
                      man, I remember my first game. It was a bunch of crappy pump-renting noobs (myself and my buddy included), and 2 overweight army brats with spyders. At any rate, it was a large desert field, and we ended up in 2 large bunkers facing each other. I mean, both teams were entirely huddled behind 2 bunkers facing each other. I eventually got bored and tried to back door them (didnt know thats what it was called then). I'm not trying to make myself sound like I had my stuff together my first day, I was sweating bullets every time I moved, probably couldnt have even shot straight (assuming my marker was up to it) if I got a shot. The refs got way too bored and called the game, on account of inactivity, and me almost sneaking around the back.


                      I understand everyone has to start somewhere, but I dislike getting stuck with 15 new guys, and 5 "regulars." Makes it hard to practice much of anything. But then again, I always have a good time, and at least some of the newer guys usually get their stuff together by the end of the day. I like it when those guys come back.

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                      • Aslan
                        Don't Ban Me...Love Me
                        • May 2005
                        • 954

                        #26
                        Originally posted by deathstalker
                        You can get your beginners to pull the trigger? Mine just hide behind the bunker and won't even shoot!

                        I've seen worse. You should see the back bunkers on Badlandz' speedball fields during open games.
                        That reminds me of another story. Earlier this year I went with a buddy to a field we hadn't tried yet. Our team was heavily weighted with noobs...and we were getting lit up because the refs were cr*p and didn't care if the teams were unfair.

                        I was doing work on my Rebel LE and was trying it out to see if some of the fixes I had made were working. Well, they weren't and the gun was jamming like MAD! I made my way to a good flanking position...brought a couple newbs with me...but the terrain got really muddy and mosquito infested...so we had to turn back a little bit. Our team started really getting hit so everybody that was left sort of retreated back to the starting location.

                        As I wander back...I realize that the reason our team seemed so overmatched in the middle of the field was that 1/4 of our team never left the starting bunker! There were easily 9 newbs poking their heads out! They hadn't even fired a shot yet! So...I do my best to hold off the opposition...got a couple eliminations as they tried to move towards us. But what was really frustrating was I actually had to TELL the guys to fire at the opposition! I'd look over and they'd all be hiding and screaming and I'd say, "HEY...shoot at them!!" I couldn't believe it.

                        Then...and here's the kicker...my gun jams for like the third time and I can't get it unjammed. So I turn to the little kid next to me and he says, "What's wrong!?" I tell him my gun is crapping out and I'm going to have to call myself out. He actually says, "Here, take my gun and use it!" WHAT! Why do people go to the field and not want to shoot anyone? I just don't understand.

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                        • shank the wiggles
                          Detroit <3
                          • Aug 2004
                          • 349

                          #27
                          Originally posted by Aslan
                          That reminds me of another story. Earlier this year I went with a buddy to a field we hadn't tried yet. Our team was heavily weighted with noobs...and we were getting lit up because the refs were cr*p and didn't care if the teams were unfair.

                          I was doing work on my Rebel LE and was trying it out to see if some of the fixes I had made were working. Well, they weren't and the gun was jamming like MAD! I made my way to a good flanking position...brought a couple newbs with me...but the terrain got really muddy and mosquito infested...so we had to turn back a little bit. Our team started really getting hit so everybody that was left sort of retreated back to the starting location.

                          As I wander back...I realize that the reason our team seemed so overmatched in the middle of the field was that 1/4 of our team never left the starting bunker! There were easily 9 newbs poking their heads out! They hadn't even fired a shot yet! So...I do my best to hold off the opposition...got a couple eliminations as they tried to move towards us. But what was really frustrating was I actually had to TELL the guys to fire at the opposition! I'd look over and they'd all be hiding and screaming and I'd say, "HEY...shoot at them!!" I couldn't believe it.

                          Then...and here's the kicker...my gun jams for like the third time and I can't get it unjammed. So I turn to the little kid next to me and he says, "What's wrong!?" I tell him my gun is crapping out and I'm going to have to call myself out. He actually says, "Here, take my gun and use it!" WHAT! Why do people go to the field and not want to shoot anyone? I just don't understand.
                          wow...............................

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                          • tribalman
                            Registered User
                            • Dec 2002
                            • 719

                            #28
                            Originally posted by Aslan

                            Then...and here's the kicker...my gun jams for like the third time and I can't get it unjammed. So I turn to the little kid next to me and he says, "What's wrong!?" I tell him my gun is crapping out and I'm going to have to call myself out. He actually says, "Here, take my gun and use it!" WHAT! Why do people go to the field and not want to shoot anyone? I just don't understand.

                            i've done that, trying to show the new guys how to play. give them my marker and then i tell them where to go. they still think the expensive gun makes the player. so i play along with it for a bit. sometimes they are too scared to do anything still. but when they do it. it's really funny to see the looks on the other teams faces when the "n00bz" win. after the game i tell them next time do that with their own gun,even if it is a rental, and see what happens. and yet again. they do pretty well then they realize that it really is the player. it's good to see how the progress over the next few visits to the field.
                            e-mag 226
                            flashed with 1.31

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                            • Arstron
                              fusionowners.org

                              • Mar 2005
                              • 2347

                              #29
                              Last weekend when I showed up to my local field there was a speed ball game going on, 10 newbie kids againts 5 newb kids that have showed up several times that ive been their and ive helped out alot. The 10 kids split up so there was 5 kids in each of the back 2 bunkers. One kid actualy moved up one bunker, but in the end they still didnt stand a chance. I always give all the young kids tips on playing and always let a couple of them borrow my extra guns. Its priceless seeing a new kids face when you offer to let them use your "Automag" when they think you said "Automatic," actualy seeing his friends jaws drop the floor when they are thinking I just let him borrow and "automatic" and they are on the other team is cool also.

                              Also I found out this weekend, as far as new players are concerned, the most intimidating thing you can do to your gun is to add a scope to it. Every newbie there thought I had to be a paintballing god becuse I had a scope on my gun. I explained to them all several times that I only used it to spot people in the woods but they didnt belive me. Dang all this talk about paintballing makes me wish I didnt have to work this weekend.... Should have my stock class mag finished by next weekend though.

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