Am I weird?

[InfinatyBPS]

Ok, I always hear my friends talking about girls and how they'd never go out with them because they're ugly or fat or something, and making fun of them, and I always say thats not cool and that they shouldn't judge people for their looks, I don't know if its because I'm fat myself and not the best looker in the world, or something else, but I always seem to judge if I "like" a girl by their personality and if we have common interests and we can talk, not by how she looks. I even get mad at my mom when she says things about how people look, and I end up arguing that people can be the most ugly person in the world, but would it realy matter if they are beutiful inside? I know alot of people will say that they think the same way, but you know most are lieing and I feel that there aren't many people out there like me. I was talking to a girl on the bus the other day about this and we both agree that looks shouldn't influence on who you want to be with, and to me that was a turn on, but her being hot has nothing to do with me liking her

[joeyjoe367]

Re: Am I weird?

Originally posted by InfinatyBPS
I was talking to a girl on the bus the other day about this and we both agree that looks shouldn't influence on who you want to be with

Oh, but they do. IT's a fact of life. If you say that you don't judge someone by the way they look the first time you see them you are:

1. Dead
2. Blind
3. Have REAllY bad eyesight
4. Not Red-Blooded
5. Lying
6. Fooling yourself.

Yeah, it sounds harsh, but it's the truth. You don't look at a pretty girl the same way that you look at a... umm... aesthetically-challanged girl.

You're less likely to want to converse with that girl than the afor-mentioned pretty girl which would prevent you from even finding OUT that the aesthetically-challenged girl has a personality that great, etc...

Now, if you're with someone simply for their looks, etc... Then I'd say that's shallow. If you *ARE* truly with someone just because their personality is sooooo great, etc... that you connect like whatever.. GREAT! It's just not going to happen that easily.

Personally, I think I'd have to be at least *remotly* attracted to someone physically, before I find out that our personalities match, etc... as shallow as it may sound, I just can't see myself fathering children with a woman that can be described as a "hag".

All IMHO, of course.

[dansim]

Re: Am I weird?

Originally posted by InfinatyBPS
I always seem to judge if I "like" a girl by their personality and if we have common interests and we can talk, not by how she looks. I end up arguing that people can be the most ugly person in the world, but would it realy matter if they are beutiful inside? I

See you only say that because your are a quasimoto





































just kidding

[shartley]

Okay... I will answer your question.... YES! You ARE weird!

(But that has nothing to do with your post or what you said in it. )

[JAM]

well, you can be sensitive without being blind.

no one can help using looks as part of a first impression.

[RamboPreacher]

it's really too bad that people can be so shallow to think that looks will last forever, or to really believe that looks are "important". I don't disagree that looks have something to do with a relationship, but that shoul;dn't be a primary issue.

I am kind of a dud now, but "back in the day". my styling cords, silk wide collar shirts and huge afro hair-do were all the rage and I had the ladies lined up for dates. The challenge was that I dind't want to date any of them.

I wanted to have a real relationship and commitment (okay, maybe I was not normal either), and for that, I knew that communication skills and common interests were very important. I have been called alot of names, but I really never even went on a date untill my senior year in HS. And then that ended up being a flop. The girl had read some articles in some electronics magazines and I thought she knew what she was talking about, but come to find out she was a "kewyword" conversationalist - bah.

[Army]

Not weird. It's called being a gentleman, a trait that is sadly lacking in far too many men, and wanna-be men, these days.

Good form lad!

[ShooterJM]

Gotta disagree army. He's weird. Not a bad weird. But if you define weird as abnormal, then he's weird. sorry dude, you're weird.

I agree with you though, although I will say there has to be SOME level of physical attraction. I mean, you'll have to wake up next to this person for the rest of your life. I mean, at the extreme, if you marry someone who's appearance actually sickens you, that's not good.

In conclusion, most people do place to much emphasis on physical appearance. And you're weird. But it's ok, I am too.

[Dayspring]

Sadly, it's genetics. We are genetically driven to look for certain traits in potential mates. (Let's not kid ourselves. You talk to the girl cuz you want to score 9 times out of 10)

There was a study I saw on TLC. They showed a baby 2 TVs, one with attractive looking faces and one with NOT so attractive faces. Baby was more apt to go towards the attractive TV images. (Shows that it's nature, not nurture.)

Me- I think everybody deserves common courtesy. If you cross a line w/ me though, courtesy goes out the window.

Good show on the manners though!

[RamboPreacher]

Originally posted by Dayspring
Sadly, it's genetics. We are genetically driven to look for certain traits in potential mates. (Let's not kid ourselves. You talk to the girl cuz you want to score 9 times out of 10)...

I disagree. I believ that as mature humans, we have choice. and I'ld like to see a cite for those statistics, because I know alot of guys that don't necessarily want to "score".
As far as the baby experimant goes, I'd like to see that information as well, since I am not privy to all the factors and variables, I can't make a judgment call on that one. "good looks" are subjective, what criterian were used to determine what was an atractive face?

courtasy and good manners - good call, agreed.

[HoppysMag]

by the deffinition of wierd, id say yes cause your not the norm... but are you wrong, no... you sir are better than i.

[ShooterJM]

I read a recent article (Time, I think. yeah, I know, a standard of scientific excellence, but they get some things right) stated that symmetry in a person is the most important determining factor. Blondes that were symmetrical were ranked as more attractive then non symmetrical, etc.

[covadsucks]

Sir Mix-a-lot begs to differ bro~

I've met Infinaty, he's not a weird kid...just needs a little more self confidence.

[hitech]

Most (if not all) people do judge people they first see based on looks. After all, until you have something else to go on it's the only thing you have. You can actually learn something by just looking at someone. After all, most people choose some portions of their appearance to project a certain image. A women's figure gives clues to her child bearing ability. An athletic build (either men or women) suggests that the person likes to participate in athletic sports.

The problem is that it is REAL easy to be wrong. But, until you have more to go on, it's all you have.

Intelligent people use all information available to them. Once they have more information to "judge" someone, they use it. I can't tell you how many times I thought some girl was "hot" only to run screaming for the hills when she opened her mouth.

Realizing that most everyone does use appearance when initially forming an opinion about someone is good. Using it as a major determining factor when better information is available is bad.

You're not weird, you just realize that there is MUCH more to someone that their appearance. As the people you associate with get older, it will seem more "normal".

[InfinatyBPS]

Well, gee thanks covad Now I don't feel weird Anyways I'm working on the self confidence thing, theres some days where I feel like I'm on top of the world and nothing can bring me down and I am completely comfortable with who I am, but theres other days where, I just can't stand myself and I want to lock myself in a dark room and rot for the rest of my life, I realy hate that, I'm either down on the floor, or high in the sky, there is no in between