cell phones

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  • WicKeD_WaYz
    Ohio State Football #91
    • Apr 2002
    • 1817

    #1

    cell phones

    Im writing and essay in my English class on cell phones. Here is our prompt...

    Before you begin writing, read the passage carefully and plan what you will say.

    "Because of cell phones, hiking in wilderness areas may be safer than before, but it is also noisier than ever. Although people might bring cell phones with them to use in case of an emergency, emergencies are rare. More often, people receive incoming business and even social calls. Technology seems to be following us everywhere: into the wilderness, and then back into civilization. Anywhere at any time, everyone else present can be disturbed by one person's call. Because more people in these circumstances are bothered by cell phones than are helped, these gadgets should not be permitted in certain public places or designated natural areas."
    -- Lois Quaide

    Explain Quaide's argument and discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with her analysis. Support your position, providing reasons and examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.


    I thought this was a good topic to bring up, partially because I need to write a paper on it and I need some opinions

    So cmon guys, whatta ya think? what are your views?

    BTW: I will post my rough draft on this when I get it done.
  • WicKeD_WaYz
    Ohio State Football #91
    • Apr 2002
    • 1817

    #2
    Ok I finished my rough draft watta ya think?


    Is it Really Smart to Ban Cell Phones From Where They Are Needed Most?
    Would you like to be stuck in the wilderness with a broken leg and no way out? How would you feel if cell phones were not allowed to be brought on a camping trip because some people are "annoyed by them"? Is it really worth the risk to not bring any link to the outside world with you when you venture off deep into the woods? Lois Quaide's argument that cell phones should not be brought into the wilderness is a completely narrow minded view of the importance of technology. In this paper I will discuss the importance of technology and how our society could not subsist without it, what the consequences could be if someone was stranded deep in the woods with no escape, and lastly, why cell phones will NEVER be banned from "certain public places or designated natural areas" as stated by Lois Quaide.

    Technology is essential to every-day living of most people around the world today, and it will only continue to breed as a nessesity. Teens today have grown up in a society where there is always an easy way out due to the propelling buildup of technological advances. It seems as if every American has obtained a cell phone in the last few years. Nowadays, much of the working population considers cell phones a demand for every day living. Teens across America share the same views. We use them to contact friends and parents at our convenience. Life would not be the same without them whether or not your in the woods.

    Take a second and think. Cell phones may be bothersome in the woods, but would you feel just as safe without one? Many hikers consider cell phones a form of a safety net "just in case". Emergencies may be seldom, but they still do take place. Is it worth the fatal consequences that could take place because some ignorrant people find cell phones "annoying"? Are cell phones really that bothersome? Are they so inconvenient that you are willing to compromise another individuals life for your own benefit? The question here is; is it worth sacrificing the saftey of many for the convenience of a few? The answer is indisputable. It is not worth risking the lives of campers and hikers so there would be less noise.

    Is it possible for cell phones to ever be banned from certain places? The answer is obvious. No. Our country has accepted this somewhat new technology with open arms, and now consider cell phones a right, not a privledge. That attitude is the primary reason why our
    population would not stand for the banning of technology. People feel they have to right to include it in their every day lives. This especially includes camping trips and hikes through the woods. Cell phones are not departing. It is insane to think people would even consider the
    banning of something that has without a doubt, saved lives.

    I have discussed the importance of technology and how our society could not subsist without it, what the consequences may be if someone was stranded in the wilderness with no outlet, and finally, why cell phones will NEVER be banned from "certain public places or designated natural areas". It is ludicrous to even consider placing a ban on cell phones when they are needed most.

    Comment

    • vf-xx
      Henchmen Inc.
      • Nov 2001
      • 3311

      #3
      3 Things

      1. You need to take out references to 'I' Rephrase the intro more along the lines of 'this paper will show...' and stuff like that.

      2. The bulk of what's written isn't specifically about phones and the wilderness instead it's about teens and the spread of technology. While I agree that the spread of technology is important and a valid argument, you give it too much face time.

      3. I assume that this is a persuasive paper. You might do well to offer a reasonable alternative soloution IE setting the phones on vibrate or something similar. Also you fail to address phone coverage issues. How many people's phones actually receive a signal in the wilderness? Granted that Sat Phones will, but that's not the issue here.
      -- Feedback--

      Comment

      • Blennidae
        an epileptic hummingbird
        • Nov 2001
        • 1920

        #4
        I think it is more of a question of "time and place" or "consideration". Its one thing to use your cell phone to call in case your buddy falls off the mountain, its another to prattle on with your buddy about the newest video game or whatever.

        People do certain things to "get away from it all". National parks and the great outdoors are a couple of good choices. The last thing they want when taking in all of natures glory is some dink on a cell phone rambling on about random stuff.

        A simillar example is cell phones in movie theaters. How obnoxious is it when a cell goes off when you are enjoying a movie. It gets worse when the person TAKES the call. Just turn it off for 2hrs. It won't kill you to miss a call. If you are THAT important, put it on vibrate and leave the theater if you have to. Common courtesy.

        Should they be banned, probably not. Should there be guidelines for their use, it would help. If people don't abide thise guidelines, the next step could be fines.

        Comment

        • TigerMan
          Meeoooow!
          • Jan 2002
          • 1100

          #5
          Limit your "Be" verbs too if you can, unless your teacher doesn't take off on them.
          Silver ULE X Valved Mag
          Spyder AMG Classic
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          Lots FS/FT! Barrels, pack, hopper and more! Click Here!

          Comment

          • irbodden
            Registered User
            • Dec 2000
            • 3413

            #6
            Just skimmed thru it..

            Get rid of the quotations around "annoyed by them".

            Don't say, "In this paper ....", don't use the word I, ever. Don't write 'NEVER' like that, this is an English paper right? Don't start every paragraph out with a question, it's weak. That last paragraph is REALLY weak.

            You are in 5th or 6th grade?

            Comment

            • Demobilized
              Who I is?
              • Jan 2003
              • 657

              #7
              I wouldnt use 'I' either, my teachers count off for it.

              Comment

              • aaron_mag
                Registered User
                • Jul 2002
                • 1375

                #8
                In some ways it is a tough topic because the arguments for and against it are very simple. This makes writing a paper and debating the issues very difficult. You are forced to reach into other areas to fill up the paper.

                Also it is hard to say whether 'I' is bad to use in a paper. I always tried to avoid it because that was the way I was taught in grade school/high school. Then when I got to college professors started telling me that avoiding 'I' was stupid.
                ULE Body Level 10 Automag intelliframe + retrovalve

                Comment

                • MantisMag
                  Dim Sum
                  • Dec 2001
                  • 1895

                  #9
                  LOTS of things they teach you in high school are stupid.

                  Comment

                  • Smegma
                    AO's Official Paper Boy
                    • Aug 2002
                    • 376

                    #10
                    Originally posted by aaron_mag
                    Also it is hard to say whether 'I' is bad to use in a paper. I always tried to avoid it because that was the way I was taught in grade school/high school. Then when I got to college professors started telling me that avoiding 'I' was stupid.
                    It completely matters on what type of paper it is.

                    After looking back at you paper, you are trying to persaued the reader to your point, so do it. Dont allow the reader to think different from your persausion by asking so many questions.
                    I throw newspapers for the OC Register, it sucks...

                    Comment

                    • Bubonic Plauge
                      Magasaurus Rex
                      • Feb 2003
                      • 96

                      #11
                      Hey, I sell these things and have for five years now.

                      NO phone is going to work in the "wilderness." Companies are not allowed to build cell towers on public land, national parks, military bases and Indian reservations. Unless a company pays monthly to have a tower on somebodies public land, chances of phones working far into the wilderness is remote. Even the newer GPRS phones are one way...for 911 only. The satelite phones by Motorola sucked, over a G for the phone and zero penetration for buildings. The Motorola Iridium went bankrupt.

                      Any more questions let me know,

                      Egg

                      Comment

                      • spydervenom
                        Superior Member #2
                        • Mar 2002
                        • 475

                        #12
                        talk about the guy that chewed his arm off when a boulder fell on it.

                        Comment

                        • WicKeD_WaYz
                          Ohio State Football #91
                          • Apr 2002
                          • 1817

                          #13
                          Notice I said that was a rough draft. If you look at my post times i typed that out in under a half hour. Im not saying English has ever been my high point though, Im more of a dont do anything type of guy. o well i tried.


                          Irbodden...No im in my last year of high school. Thanks though


                          spydervenom...ya that happened like right by my house, kinda scary.


                          Guys im just developing this essay writing stuff give me a break.

                          Comment

                          • Jack_Dubious
                            ubi dubium ibi libertas
                            • Apr 2002
                            • 922

                            #14
                            When cellphones are outlawed for hiking, only hiking outlaws will have cellphones.

                            JDub

                            "Automags.org. You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy."

                            Comment

                            • Mia238
                              Registered User
                              • Jan 2018
                              • 1

                              #15
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                              http://essaycorrector.org/blog/edito...nal-assistance

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