Super Glue, with Extra Super Power!

[ScatterPlot]

While perusing the asiles of the Dollar store the other day, one thing caught my eye. It was a 6 pack of Super glue. Now I don't know how it is at your house, but at mine we use super glue like once before we either lose it or get it clogged somehow. So I think, "Hey, a 6 pack! That should last us a while!" And I'm not complaining, though all I have used it for so far is a couple rubber doohickies that fell off my computer. Anyway, on further examination of the instructions on the back, I found that they were translated by either a drunk Chinese guy or an online translator. What follows is the back of the package of Super Glue, with Extra Super Power.
Keep in mind I am typing this EXACTLY as written on the back, punctuation and spelling and use of spacebar included.

Super Glue bottle is well designed to protect leakage or drop the nozzle, specially designed!!

APPLICATION
1.Super Glue,cyanoacrylate adhesive,has an amazing new quick bonding power of multi-purpose against wood, plastic,ceramic,rubber,metal etc..

2. Bonds daily domestic goods, interior goods, electric appliance, accessories, hobbies and sporting goods,automobile accessories.

CARE IN HANDLING
1.Do not soread or touch the adhesiv with the finger. When carelessly touched,rub the handcream and soften with warm water,so it can be easily removed.


-more in a minute-

[_tMAN]

lol
Super glue is dangerous

[ScatterPlot]

-sorry bout the delay, had to do something-

ANYWAYS-


2.If eye contact occurs,hois lids open and flush with water,and consult with doctor, Neither use any solvents nor rub the eye.
3.Due to immediate bondign,KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN!!

CARE ON USE.

1.DO not use Suoer Glue on to the polyethelyene, flouocarbon and silicon materials.
2.Wipe with alcohols or sandpaper the comtact surace to remoce moisture,rust,oil and fat etc..
3.Give a slight moisture onto the wlld suffaces when difficult to bond.

1. Set the cap ring onto the screw As illustrated (there isn't an illustration) Hold the cap and nozzle with left hand, and screw the tube with right hand slowo ly clockwise, then the contents come out from the tip.
2.After use,WIPE THE NOZZLE TIO with soft paper.
3.Tigthly cap and store.
4.Whem clogged at the nozzle tip, on next use, CUT THE EXTENDER NOZZLE,and tightly cap with one of the suitable holes.



WHAT THE CRAP IS A SUITABLE HOLE???
Anyway, I enjoyed that. There are some others like this out there, though not this long, maybe just some snippet or something. Post if ya got it.

[swanster]

I once saw a picture of a canned food product turned upside down. On the bottem it said "do not turn upside down'

[ShooterJM]

-WHAT THE CRAP IS A SUITABLE HOLE???

That answer changes depending on each woman....

[warpfeedmod]

hahahah reminds me of Engrish

[Tunaman]

Well here is what it says in my new Milling machine instructions...
"Do not keep in the sunshine place".

[spazzed]

That answer changes depending on each woman....

Dude..

[ShooterJM]

I tried to resist....I swear....