Very funny story

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  • gc82000
    LNIB just a few scratches
    • Mar 2004
    • 1346

    #1

    Very funny story

    (April 2003) Our office has a paper towel dispenser in the kitchen. It holds a roll of blue paper towels without a cardboard tube in the center, and towels are pulled from a hole in the bottom of the dispenser. It is also refilled from the bottom. Press a catch and the base swings open, then a roll is shoved in, and the base is closed again. To prevent the roll from falling out before the base is closed, the dispenser is fitted with a "non-return device" -- a set of plastic flaps that hinge up but not down.
    Bill was bored. Computer programming wasn't sufficient exercise for his vivid imagination. He wandered into the kitchen to make some tea, and as he waited for the kettle to boil, his eye fell upon the towel dispenser. The cleaners had failed to refill it and it was empty, with its base hanging open.

    Terminally bored, Bill felt a sudden urge to see what it looked like from the inside.

    To his delight, his head fitted into the dispenser fairly well. He was not a particularly tall man, and the unit was mounted high on the wall, so he stood high on his tiptoes for a better view... That was just the right height. The non-return device "non-returned" right under his chin!

    How long can one stand on one's tiptoes? Not very long, according to Bill's colleagues, who were attracted by the thrashing, choking noises coming from the kitchen. They found Bill dangling by the throat from a paper towel dispenser!

    Fortunately, they were able to release him without permanent damage. It was quite entertaining to watch. I do however wonder what an inquest would have made of the situation if he *had* strangled himself.

    And I wish I'd had a camera.
    I am a declared Carb lover.

    Member and president of the Anti-Atkins Group.

    Advocate for the promotion of Rice, the truest sticky icky.
  • Altimas
    Registered User
    • Feb 2004
    • 909

    #2
    OMG that is one of the funnies things I have ever heard... Check this out too:

    This is an Email I received from the Campus police the other day.

    This email is from Randy Youngblood, Chief of BSC Police Department, and it was sent to the entire campus community.


    Please be advised that UAB and Samford have experienced problems recently with
    an individual approaching females on their campuses and physically removing
    their shoes. The subject then flees afterwards. While this sounds somewhat
    comical, it is actually happening at those institutions. There is an active
    warrant from the Homewood Police Department for the offender, and we have
    information/photos of the individual posted at Campus Police Office.

    The offender is described by Samford PD as a b/m with brn eyes, blk hair, dark
    complexion, approximately 5/9, 150 lbs.

    The offender's MO to date is to approach women in campus libraries or computer
    labs and begin asking questions about their shoes. The questions are framed
    so to give the impression that he is considering purchasing the same shoe for
    an acquaintance or family member. He asks the female if she would take one of
    her shoes off for him to look at, then he proceeds to attempt to remove the
    second shoe physically.

    Again, we know this sounds bizarre but we have confirmed that it is true. We
    therefore ask that you be aware of this matter and notify the Campus Police
    immediately if you encounter this person.

    Thank you.

    Randy Youngblood
    Chief of Campus Police
    Rifle Team Administrator
    Birmingham-Southern College
    "If we aren't supposed to eat animals...why did God invent BBQ sauce?" - Army
    AO Feedback

    Comment

    • gc82000
      LNIB just a few scratches
      • Mar 2004
      • 1346

      #3
      For some reason I can see some ppl doing this.
      I am a declared Carb lover.

      Member and president of the Anti-Atkins Group.

      Advocate for the promotion of Rice, the truest sticky icky.

      Comment

      • wanna-b-ballin'
        Pump Player
        • Jan 2005
        • 1380

        #4
        dont the victims scream or anything?i'd be like wtf is he doing? and probably kick him or something if i was a girl. it would be really annoyoing though, having to keep a lookout for your shoes though.
        upgrade fund: $145

        Comment

        • SAW
          It's a trap!
          • Nov 2004
          • 846

          #5
          The towel dispenser is pretty funny, although I would think his weight would pull the mounting device off the wall...
          Back at this...

          Comment

          • MayAMonkeyBeYourPinata
            Another One Bites The Dust
            • Feb 2003
            • 2246

            #6
            Damn he could have had a great shot at the Darwin Award.
            Love Will Tear Us Apart

            Comment

            • tony3
              LOOKING FOR AN ASIAN GF!!!
              • Feb 2003
              • 3740

              #7
              If he died, everyone would of said suicide.

              www.TeamNever.com

              Comment

              • RingOfScale
                Americanized Thai Pancake
                • Sep 2003
                • 898

                #8
                i dunno tony, if he was really trying to kill himself, would he doing with a towel dispenser on the wall ?!?!? i highly doubt it, people would probably realised what was happen, and as that other guy said, given him a darwin award. would have been pretty funny even though he was dead.
                <<90 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot>>

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