Lets tal;k about divorce and how it affected you

[Carbon]

ohhh the drama...

questions first.

Are you divorced or are you from a "broken" home.

When did your folks get divorced.

how did you deal with it?


my folks divorced about 5 years ago. It was weird because they never really fought, argued or had the passion or the strenght to even keep the realtion ship alive. It was weird man, it was obvious the marriage was dead. They slept in seperate rooms ect ect. It like their presence in the same room was a shirade. They got along, and were pleasant toward each other. But invariably things had to take its course.

Im all about marriage and all that stuff, bit of a romantic really. But seeing my folks go through that mess...you know, i just dont ever want to fail at something that will affect my children or whatever.

[quik]

My mom and dad got divorced when I was 13, I'll be 19 in August. It didnt really change me at all. Guess I could know my dad a little better but hey, at least they dont drink anymore.

I'll probably marry some Japanese chick and get divorced to her 5 or so years later, mainly because I cannot take the way Japanese women act.

[covadsucks]

The day before I got married, December 7th, 2002, my mother told me that my father wanted her to abort me as I wasn't supposed to be born as they were already separated and he was seeing someone else (my stepmom of 30 years). He also served her with divorce papers when she was recovering after giving birth...he's a real piece of work when he wants to be.

What has it done to me as a person??? I am not happy hearing the fact that I was a tool being created/used to keep a dead marriage alive, but I scored bigtime with my stepparents as both are better people than my biological parents ever were/are.

It's going on 30 years for me -you get used to it in time. I just try to be honest with my feelings with my wife and so far so good we're getting by just fine.

[MrWallen]

Parents divorced when I was 2, so it's pretty much all I've ever known. They still get along great (fortunately).

However, they worked out an arrangement so that I spent every other week with one or the other since the day of the divorce to summer of Junior year (my Dad moved away then). This meant having to remember to constantly bring things back and forth between houses, which majorly sucked because, invariably, I always ended up forgetting stuff (usually school stuff).

Anyways, it turns out that, while they are friendly most of the time, and always in front of me, there is/has been a passive/aggressive war going on between them, over me. You'd think it would end after I moved away to college, but no. Divorce sucks.

[Muzikman]

My parents got divorced when I was 2 also. They were married for a whole 4 years, so atleast it made me feel better when i got older to know atleast they were married before I was born. So, they have been divorced for about 27 years now and they still talk, although my mother thinks my father is a total nut case some times (which I agree with). Both have been great parents and since I was so young and don't remember them together my life has always just been mom on the weekdays and dad on the weekends. Besides, I basically got double the presents on holidays!

My father never remarried. My mother remarried in 84 and had my half brother with the biggest a-hole in the world. They divorced 5 or 6 years later (thankfully) and I think my mother now hates men

That is my life in a nut shell.

[steimway]

The day before I got married, December 7th, 2002, my mother told me that my father wanted her to abort me as I wasn't supposed to be born as they were already separated and he was seeing someone else

That's one of the worst things I've ever heard. What was she trying to gain by telling you this?

[Maggot6]

MY parents had a really bad divorce, surprisingly my dad wasn't the drunk freak who abused us, it was our mother. It took about 4 years to finish the divorce, between my mother wanting more money, wanting the kids (me, and 3 sisters) not signing papers, leaving the country and a bunch of stuff. Finally we got the death threats to us(kids) and my father on tape, and that helped a little bit. This all happened when I was about 9 years old, at that time I still couldn't cook for myself, so I went to school everyday with granola bars, and no breakfast usually, and my oldest sister would make dinner while my mother was in her room "meditating" with an unusual bottle beside her Eventually, in the canadian court system, after 3 years I finally got to move to my fathers, and for the past year and a half I have been living in my origonal home which he ( father) had to buy back, because my mom was trying to sell it for some money....
Before the divorce, I have to call the cops twice because my mother started to beat my father in his sleep, and he had to restrain her...

All in all, I havn't spoken to my mother sense december, which was when I called her for her birthday, and she told me that she never wanted to speak to me again...

Divorce is Great

[MoneyShot]

My parents got divorced when i was about 5. I still remember some things when they were still married but not a lot. It hasnt really affected me because im still really close with both of them. I see my dad every tuesday, which he gets us and usually takes us out to eat or something. Then i go with my dad every other weekend and stay there.

[Eatem Alive]

ohhh the drama...

questions first.

Are you divorced or are you from a "broken" home. technically no

When did your folks get divorced. I was around 30 or so

how did you deal with it? pissed at first but i have my own family to raise so that is where my focus is. it would have probably been different if i was still at home. it is still really wierd to see them someone else.

...

[RRfireblade]

ohhh the drama...

questions first.

Are you divorced or are you from a "broken" home.

When did your folks get divorced.

how did you deal with it?

Double whammy here. When I was 6, Dad ditched me and Mom 2000 miles from home.Sold off everything we/they owned and left the state. Left us in NYC with 2 suitcases. (lived in AZ at the time)

After 12 years of Marriage (14yrs together), I'm going thru the big "D" myself. Still friendly....kinda but I think it'll get worse before it's over and done. Will always love her as she was a part of my life and soul for almost half of my total existance.

As for "Dad":

Pretty pissed off like most people. Saw my Dad once since then (around age 14), glad he left us after that encounter. Have no idea where he is now and don't really care but I hope it's painfull.

The "Wife" :

Hard to put into words, it was a long time coming and a long time ending but you still have a hard time accepting it regardless.We just went different ways and changed, as people do over that length of time, away from each other.I hope we'll stay in contact, fortunately no casualties (children) but I have a feeling it won't work out that way. Probably leave a scare that will take a long time to heal..........


Holy crap, that sounded depressing...........

Sorry 'bout that.

[Carbon]

yeah man. its strange. Growing up, all my budies came from divorced famiies.

A lot of the times i think of the notion of, Marriage: The Institution, like its some kind of lifelong university that you attend with a pass or fail grade.

[RRfireblade]

I don't know, I mean everyones different but it just seems like 'humans' learn, adapt and evolve throughout thier whole lifetime. It's seems unlikely that 2 would follow that same path for a real extended period of time. Eventual you lose that connection and either 'go thru the paces' , sometimes cause of children or whatever or you meet someone who matches up better with your current stage in life and you realize your not actually happy and very well could be. I'm sure it's different for different people but that's what it seems like to me.

[Automaggot68]

My Parents started a Bitteer divorce that would alst two-three years when I was around 13.
It started with my mother never being home, telling us that she was at Walmart untill 1-3 in the morning.
She then was unfaithful to my father several times.
During this, my father lost his job and at the time, I was given a choice as to whom I wanted to live with.
I chose my father, but I was given to my mother, who was later awarded the profits from selling our home.
Also of note: During this my mother told several of her friends, family members, and the Court that my Father Beat her. I myself belived this untill I walked in on them fighting one morning, and witnessed her throwing herself into several of our birdcages in the Den of our home. At the time, we lived in a very nice home on Ann Road, in the Canyon Creek North Housing complex.

After this I bore witness to several other incidents of her self-injuries that she later blamed him for.

This hurt me deeply, and along with other events has very much tarnished my relationship with her.

When I turned 16, she kicked me out, and I moved in with my father (who had no idea that I was on a plane, on my way to live with him) It was the 'best' thing she's ever done for me

I mentioned out nice home? After the money from Escrow, and the joint bank account, She moved into North Las vegas. The Crappy Part. Whee.

While living with her I developed a horrible drug problem, I was an alcoholic, and I dropped out of school. I had several run in's with the law as well.

Fast foreward tro Present. I'm 19, and One and a half years ago I made up several years of school in a period of 9-10 months, in the Charter School of San Diego, Graduated Early with a 3.6 GPA, and I attend Mesa Junior College, waiting to transfer into UCSD. I've also been VERY clean since November 2002

I hate my mother.


That's all a big summary of the divorce, and life immediatly after, and during. Blagh.

[atm743]

my parents got divorced when i was 8 but atleast my parents at least talk. they both live in the same town soo ill be able to see both of them.

this really sucks cuse i hate my mother. she is ok from time to time but she is jest a B most of the time.

she used to hit me during the beging of the divorce. that got to my head quick. soo everytime someone came up to me i used to think they were going to hit me or do somthing to me. i got over that after a cupple of years. we now still get along but when i turn 16 im going to court soo i can can live with my father.

the only thing i hate about my parents being divorced is that i have to go to my moms every other week and i hate that cuse i have to pack crap to take with me then be with her.


during school its sucks. going everywere. i hate it when it comes to school time .

[Cameo]

my drama..
my parents first divorced when I was in 5th or 6th grade...My mother left my father for another man.. I knew about all of her affairs that had been going on for about 4 years.. She told us all storts of stories and lies about my father so that we would hate him... Then one day she just up and took us kids to her new mans house. My father came home from work and got the divorce papers that day...I only lived with my mother and her abusive boyfriend for about a week before I got "kicked out". I went to live with my father who treated me like gold.. My bothers and sisters would come to visit every other weekend (there were 6 kids total), but I never again saw my mother untill my 13th birthday. I guess my siblings had it pretty rough, It was very apperent that my mother only wanted the kids for the money and to dangle them over my fathers head. Bad bad experience...

When I was 16 my mother decided that she was going to move from Utah to Pennsylvania (where my parents families were). My father and I went to visit and help them move, we ended up staying. A year later my parents moved back in together and got remarried. They just pushed the family back together which caused lasting effects on all of us children. We all rebelled in one way or another. No one was happy, and 4 of the 6 kids got out of the house as quickly as possible..

Inevidably my mother cheated on my father again and left him again and again.. every few years they get divorced and remarried, and my mother screws my father over all the while trying to make herself out to be a "victim" in some way. Everyone now knows better and has realized that there is something desperatly wrong with my mother.

The current tally is 4 weddings and they are now seperated again, pending divorce. I hope that my father gives up on "the promise I made to your mother, my self and God" and does not take my mother back for the 5th time...

My mother was raised in a household where her mother had been married/divorced numerous times, I just pray that I do not keep that "tradition" alive.. I only want to be married once and for life.