Welcome to cooking for that special someone, also known as 'Being a better chef than Footemps".
I'm your host, Automaggot68.
It's Febuary 13th!
You have no plans for tomorrow!
The wimmins is gonna kill you, she is.
What are you to do?
Cook for her!
With these simple directions, you too, CAN BE JUST LIKE AUTOMAGGOT68.
Step one of course is to pick a dish...hmm...
My Girlfriend is partial to orientel cousine, and I have a few things laying around the house.....
Here We go! Clean and cube up a boneless, skinless chicken breast!
Season* it it a bit, and get ready for your next step!
*Remember children, to season means to apply both salt and pepper to saidfood item.
Alright, cover the and put it aside for a moment.
Put a medium sized pot of water on the stove to boil.
This is where all of the Internest badasses with show your talent for sharp things!
Slice thinly several small peppers, and one onion. Sweat them in a few tablespoons of peanutoil, and let them cookdown for a while. The key here is to allow the natural sugars of both vegetables to break down.
Alright! Now we're sorta like REAL cooks!
What you'll want to do is find yourself two servings of Udon noodles. Any variety will do.
Don't lose them. They're crucial.
Next up, move the vegetables to the sides of your Wok, Stainless steel skillet, or whatever the hell you're cookign with, you caveman! This will take those veggies off of the direct heat, and allow them to stay warm.
In the middle of your circle of onions/peppers, put the cubed chicken in, and add two tablespoons of a garlic and blackbean paste. I made mine from scratch, but you Casanovas don't have time for that! You can get it from the store, sillyheads.
Cook the meat untill done.Doin't burn it, idiots!
See? This isn't so hard! Find some ginger. What? No! Not Gilligan's island, you cretin!
This stuff!
Grate a small bit, or to your taste.
Then, Throw that in with the chicken and mix that shiz up commander!
Alright, remember that pot of water? Lets stick it to those noodles!
Toss both servings (Remember slackers, TWO of them) and let them cook.
Don't throw it on the ceiling, dont bite it.
When the noodles are done, they're float and rise to the top of the water.
Now to clear some things up, you want MORE water than noodles.
Hard to follow? I know guys, I know.
Hey! See how I once again took the food off the direct heat? If you did so without my telling you, good job!
If not, DO IT.
Or don't. Whichever.
When the noodles are cooked, remove them from the water, and palce them directly onto that area you cleared previously.
Like this, geniuses!
It doesn't matter if you got a little of the noodle water in the skillet/wok/cavemanbowlthing, the starch from the noodle will help flavors from the vegetables, chicken and sauce cling to the noodles!
Now boys and girls, here is where you will really shine!
You can add any number of things from here!
I opted to steam from broccoli, and toss it in for flavor, texture, and visual purposes.
Remember guys, we dont jsut eat with our mouths and stomachs, we eat with our eyes, our noses, our ears.
LISTEN to your dish sizzle, smell it, enjoy it. Cooking Can be fun.
Presentation is also key here.
Using tongs, get a good amount of your noodle/meat/veggie combo, and lift it up and onto a plate. Twist and set it down. Results may vary, but if you do it correctly, it'll actually look pretty neat.
Serve and enjoy.
Thank you for tuning into A Very special Valentine's Day episode of, 'Being a better Chef than footemps.'
I hope you all have a good Valintine's Day tomorrow.
Chelsea, I love you.
I wish that I could have cooked this for you in person, but this thread will have to do, babydoll.
I'm your host, Automaggot68.
It's Febuary 13th!
You have no plans for tomorrow!
The wimmins is gonna kill you, she is.
What are you to do?
Cook for her!
With these simple directions, you too, CAN BE JUST LIKE AUTOMAGGOT68.
Step one of course is to pick a dish...hmm...
My Girlfriend is partial to orientel cousine, and I have a few things laying around the house.....
Here We go! Clean and cube up a boneless, skinless chicken breast!
Season* it it a bit, and get ready for your next step!
*Remember children, to season means to apply both salt and pepper to saidfood item.
Alright, cover the and put it aside for a moment.
Put a medium sized pot of water on the stove to boil.
This is where all of the Internest badasses with show your talent for sharp things!
Slice thinly several small peppers, and one onion. Sweat them in a few tablespoons of peanutoil, and let them cookdown for a while. The key here is to allow the natural sugars of both vegetables to break down.
Alright! Now we're sorta like REAL cooks!
What you'll want to do is find yourself two servings of Udon noodles. Any variety will do.
Don't lose them. They're crucial.
Next up, move the vegetables to the sides of your Wok, Stainless steel skillet, or whatever the hell you're cookign with, you caveman! This will take those veggies off of the direct heat, and allow them to stay warm.
In the middle of your circle of onions/peppers, put the cubed chicken in, and add two tablespoons of a garlic and blackbean paste. I made mine from scratch, but you Casanovas don't have time for that! You can get it from the store, sillyheads.
Cook the meat untill done.Doin't burn it, idiots!
See? This isn't so hard! Find some ginger. What? No! Not Gilligan's island, you cretin!
This stuff!
Grate a small bit, or to your taste.
Then, Throw that in with the chicken and mix that shiz up commander!
Alright, remember that pot of water? Lets stick it to those noodles!
Toss both servings (Remember slackers, TWO of them) and let them cook.
Don't throw it on the ceiling, dont bite it.
When the noodles are done, they're float and rise to the top of the water.
Now to clear some things up, you want MORE water than noodles.
Hard to follow? I know guys, I know.
Hey! See how I once again took the food off the direct heat? If you did so without my telling you, good job!
If not, DO IT.
Or don't. Whichever.
When the noodles are cooked, remove them from the water, and palce them directly onto that area you cleared previously.
Like this, geniuses!
It doesn't matter if you got a little of the noodle water in the skillet/wok/cavemanbowlthing, the starch from the noodle will help flavors from the vegetables, chicken and sauce cling to the noodles!
Now boys and girls, here is where you will really shine!
You can add any number of things from here!
I opted to steam from broccoli, and toss it in for flavor, texture, and visual purposes.
Remember guys, we dont jsut eat with our mouths and stomachs, we eat with our eyes, our noses, our ears.
LISTEN to your dish sizzle, smell it, enjoy it. Cooking Can be fun.
Presentation is also key here.
Using tongs, get a good amount of your noodle/meat/veggie combo, and lift it up and onto a plate. Twist and set it down. Results may vary, but if you do it correctly, it'll actually look pretty neat.
Serve and enjoy.
Thank you for tuning into A Very special Valentine's Day episode of, 'Being a better Chef than footemps.'
I hope you all have a good Valintine's Day tomorrow.
Chelsea, I love you.
I wish that I could have cooked this for you in person, but this thread will have to do, babydoll.
. Might have to make that sometime in the near future.
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