Check out my aw3som3 laceration...

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  • billybob_81067
    A.O.'s official Redneck
    • Jan 2001
    • 1682

    #1

    Check out my aw3som3 laceration...

    We were working calves today that were out on pasture, giving them a couple of shots, tagging them, and then casterating the bulls. Well we didn't have a squeeze chute, so we were just throwing the ones that we could and squeezing the bigger ones up between a panel and the fence. Worked O.K. but they were still giving us fits bouncing around and kicking like crazy.

    Well my dad started off cutting them while I held them and then after a while of that he damn near cut the tip of his pointer finger off while slicing open the sack. So then it was his turn to hold and my turn to cut and work them. We got through about 35 of the ~45 calves we had to work when I was cutting this one and he kicked me and caused me to slice open the palm of my hand.

    I was bleeding like a stuck pig and after a few choice words I proceeded to finish slicing him open and ripped that bastards testicles out and threw them at him. LOL

    We kept working the rest of the calves, and In no time my cut was covered in calf blood, crap, piss, and hair. Talk about sanitary! So I figured I might as well post up a couple pics of my cut seeing as how some of you other guys have posted up pics of injuries. These pics are after washing it thoroughly with soap and water, you couldn't even tell my hand was cut before I washed it because of all the caked on blood and stuff. It's pretty sweet because if I move my thumb you can see the muscles move in and out of the cut.



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  • Kyle.Kimber
    Resident Sexologist
    • Dec 2005
    • 460

    #2
    The Colbert Report had a segment on healthcare, in it was a quote from this carpenter who didn't want to pay $700 for stiches, so now he has an in field sutchure (sp) kit. Boy, I've never had a bad injury like that, my brother just recently shattered his orbit on a garage door, DON'T MESS WITH THEM, THEY WILL KILL YOU, and it was up to me to save his life, and I did. I'M a hero, I know.

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    • trevorjk
      <S>WooLooLoo</S>
      • Dec 2002
      • 4324

      #3
      can i lick it?
      t33kyboy "So if a cat is dropped from 11 inches, it will most likely die."

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      • skife
        Unregistered User
        • Feb 2003
        • 2769

        #4
        Originally posted by billybob_81067
        Worked O.K. but they were still giving us fits bouncing around and kicking like crazy.

        what would you do if someone tried to cut your balls off?




        [21:00] < FunkTehChillinMunky > I've got a Warped Sportz Dark Talon

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        • neppo1345
          I Will Eat Your Children..
          • Oct 2005
          • 1913

          #5
          Scale of toughness based on wound you worked through.

          +0 Skin punctured.

          +2 Deep Puncture

          +4 Muscle Showing.

          +7 Bone Showing.

          +9 Arterial Bleeding

          +10 Complete Amputation

          You score a 4 on the 'tough guy' scale.

          I'm sure you can tack on some bonus points based on Environment (AKA Cow Dung).
          Last edited by neppo1345; 04-12-2007, 03:34 AM. Reason: Spelled ARTERIAL wrong :(

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          • WalkingTarget
            Registered User
            • Mar 2007
            • 107

            #6
            hope you had the thing stitched, or stitched it yourself...

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            • geekwarrior
              MIA
              • Oct 2005
              • 2581

              #7
              Originally posted by neppo1345
              Scale of toughness based on wound you worked through.

              +0 Skin punctured.

              +2 Deep Puncture

              +4 Muscle Showing.

              +7 Bone Showing.

              +9 Arterial Bleeding

              +10 Complete Amputation

              You score a 4 on the 'tough guy' scale.

              I'm sure you can tack on some bonus points based on Environment (AKA Cow Dung).

              I could post a pic of my friend that would score a 8.....but I dont know of AO could stomach it.

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              • billybob_81067
                A.O.'s official Redneck
                • Jan 2001
                • 1682

                #8
                Originally posted by trevorjk
                can i lick it?
                No.

                what would you do if someone tried to cut your balls off?
                I sure as hell wouldn't just stand there (or maybe I would cause I don't want any more kids EVER!). But I expect the cattle to cause humans > cattle.

                Woot! Scored a 4, maybe a 5!

                And no no stitches. Hunted around for some super glue last night, but didn't find any so I used a couple band-aids to keep from getting blood all over the bedsheets last night.
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                • warbeak2099
                  That is my foot!
                  • Jan 2004
                  • 4447

                  #9
                  Try a can of newskin lol.
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                  • ß?µ£ §mµ®ƒ
                    University of Rochester
                    • Aug 2003
                    • 1012

                    #10
                    Go get yourself some stitches and get that properly cleaned
                    • AGD "Yea well our intention is to
                      take over the world....one country at a time..... :)"

                    • Rt Pro X Valved Warp fed My Rtp
                    • Props to Echo for the sig

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                    • Army
                      Moderator of DOOOOOOOOMMM!

                      • Oct 2000
                      • 5785

                      #11
                      Ya know....you could have tossed and tied them. Makes it a lot easier to cut and brand.

                      dang rednecks give us cowboys a bad name

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                      • paintballfiend
                        I like pudding.
                        • Jun 2006
                        • 555

                        #12
                        Oh, how manly.

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