Guy's Rules...

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  • cyberave68
    www.BigEvilOnline.com
    • Feb 2004
    • 1084

    #1

    Guy's Rules...

    I thought this was funny. For those of you who have seen it sorry, and no need to bad mouth anything if you dont like it just keep it to your self...



    The Guys' Rules*******************
    At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

    Finally , the guys' side of the story.
    ( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
    We always hear " the rules "
    From the female side.


    Now here are the rules from the male side.
    These are our rules!
    Please note... these are all numbered "1"
    ON PURPOSE!

    1. Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
    or the changing of the tides.
    Let it be.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
    And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
    we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.

    See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to
    act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
    Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes
    you sad or angry, then we meant the other one!

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    Or tell us how you want it done.
    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
    commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color . Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
    have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
    We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
    nothing's wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know
    you will bring it up again later.

    1. If you ask a question! you do n't want an answer to, Expect an answer
    you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
    Really .

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
    discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
    or golf.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.
    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;



    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
    Zero Gravity Customs

    Play hard or go home......
    My feedback
    http://www.automags.org/forums/showthread.php?t=129891
  • paintballwannab
    do i know you
    • Jul 2003
    • 899

    #2
    LOL......I would have to say almost all of those are exactly correct.

    Well done!
    Automags.Org Online Forums - feedback for paintballwannab

    Comment

    • Epic Fail Guy

      #3
      Subject: FWD: THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN
      From: [email protected]
      Date: Friday, January 26th 2007 at 3:12 PM

      hello derek this is your grandma! this is a joke that someone sent me. it's so observational and true!

      -----Forwarded Message-----

      THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN

      1. Women order wine while at fancy parties, but men order BEER!

      2. Women have periods and men leave the toilet seat up every GOD DAMN TIME what's that about?

      3. Women are smart and read books but men watch FOOTBALL and BURP!

      4. Women go through the pain of child birth but men let their buttcracks hang out of their pants EW!

      5. Women take forever to put on makeup but men CHEAT ON THEIR WIVES ALL OF THEM DO.

      6. Women cry at good movies and men SMELL LIKE S#*&$.

      7. When women get together they comfort one another and talk about important issues, and when men get together they fight and give each other GAY KISSES in their stupid little garages.

      8. Women always land on their feet when dropped from a height but men OGLE OTHER WOMEN'S CLEAVAGE constantly in public.

      9. Women can become lawyers and doctors but men can only JERK OFF IN THEIR OWN FACES.

      and lastly...

      10. Women fake orgasms but men should JUST DIE IN A FIRE ALREADY ARGH.

      Comment

      • SCpoloRicker
        HA HA I'm custom!!1
        • Jan 2004
        • 4375

        #4


        /just sayin'
        God....I guess I was probably returning videotapes.

        Comment

        • Epic Fail Guy

          #5
          Originally posted by SCpoloRicker
          www.nomarriage.com

          /just sayin'
          I love you Rick.


          /sorry about phone reception

          Comment

          • SCpoloRicker
            HA HA I'm custom!!1
            • Jan 2004
            • 4375

            #6
            In a stylish fashion, maychance?

            /yeah, that phone is full of lose
            God....I guess I was probably returning videotapes.

            Comment

            • maxama10
              Take off every zig!
              • Sep 2004
              • 1497

              #7
              Originally posted by Epic Fail Guy

              hello derek this is your grandma! this is a joke that someone sent me. it's so observational and true!


              I had a suspicion!

              Comment

              • Epic Fail Guy

                #8
                Originally posted by maxama10
                I had a suspicion!
                /dodgy

                Comment

                • maglover728
                  Boomer!
                  • Apr 2004
                  • 1093

                  #9
                  Originally posted by Epic Fail Guy
                  I love you Rick.


                  /sorry about phone reception

                  Had to add that to my favorite links list. Thanks.
                  stay proud, Stay mechanical!

                  And my feed back is at: http://www.automags.org/forums/showthread.php?p=1771790#post1771790

                  Comment

                  • t0nnn
                    Registered User
                    • Feb 2007
                    • 552

                    #10
                    nice erik lol I deal with that stuff everyday as do many people on here

                    Comment

                    • AO Moderation Team
                      AO Mod Team

                      • Jan 2005
                      • 236

                      #11
                      Originally posted by Epic Fail Guy
                      /dodgy

                      Hmmmmmmmm
                      -The AO Moderation Team
                      "Everything in Moderation"

                      Comment

                      • Epic Fail Guy

                        #12
                        Originally posted by AO Moderation Team
                        Hmmmmmmmm
                        Do I know you?
                        Last edited by Guest; 05-10-2007, 01:54 AM.

                        Comment

                        • AO Moderation Team
                          AO Mod Team

                          • Jan 2005
                          • 236

                          #13
                          Originally posted by Epic Fail Guy
                          Sup Boss?
                          lol...Nice Edit.

                          Originally posted by Epic Fail Guy
                          Do I know you?
                          More like do we know YOU?
                          -The AO Moderation Team
                          "Everything in Moderation"

                          Comment

                          • SCpoloRicker
                            HA HA I'm custom!!1
                            • Jan 2004
                            • 4375

                            #14
                            God....I guess I was probably returning videotapes.

                            Comment

                            • Epic Fail Guy

                              #15
                              Originally posted by AO Moderation Team
                              lol...Nice Edit.



                              More like do we know YOU?
                              Oh noes, I editted it!

                              Comment

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