Funniest Paintball stories

[KornKamp02]

Originally posted by RT pRo AuToMaG


no comment....LOL

Once you know him you get used to all the jokes about his nickname.......

[KornKamp02]

Another one,


Ok, it was a 4 on 1 Kyle(hock), Chris his bro, Colin, and Me against..... DICK (lol). Anyway the plan was that Kyle and colin would circle around the barn and try to come around from behind while cris and I tried to keep him hiding behind his bunker, after unleashing about a hopperfull of paint and trying to keep him down so colin and kyle could sneak behind him for a good shot I heard them both yell "OUT!" and I quickly realized it was just Chris and I and I told chris that I would run towards his bunker while chris run behind me shooting at it so I could get there and bunker him. So, I start running as fast as I can towards his bunker and I look back and Chris is still standing there behind the barn! I yell "COME ON!!" he yells "I'M SCARED!" lol, so I'm running and all of a sudden I take a hit from about 5 feet away right in the chest. All because chris was afraid. Well, chris is only like 10 and he got hit in the neck earlier that day so he was still suffering from shell shock so I told him I was sorry i yelled at him and I could understand.

[hockaloogey]

aight, it wasn't all of us against dick, it was kamp, cris, and me against colin and dick (btw we don't get hosed by 'dicks', that's his nickname) we're not that hopeless and the reason he beats us all the time is because we suck since we're so young, and his friends could whoop us too, and just about anyone since we don't get out there that often. we're always like, "hey, let's go paintballing!" and then we don't. i feel bad because i keep going but its a situation in which i can't bring kamp so he's only actually played w/ me once, but for some odd reason (since we've been friends since kindergarten) we want to make a team...

[elpimpo]

dude age has nothing to do with it. i know these 2 twelve year olds that own it up down in co. then i know a kid thats 16 that whips lasoya so dont give me this we suck cause were young

[KornKamp02]

Originally posted by hockaloogey
aight, it wasn't all of us against dick, it was kamp, cris, and me against colin and dick (btw we don't get hosed by 'dicks', that's his nickname) we're not that hopeless and the reason he beats us all the time is because we suck since we're so young, and his friends could whoop us too, and just about anyone since we don't get out there that often. we're always like, "hey, let's go paintballing!" and then we don't. i feel bad because i keep going but its a situation in which i can't bring kamp so he's only actually played w/ me once, but for some odd reason (since we've been friends since kindergarten) we want to make a team...

Oh yeah, I remember now, we don't suck that bad. It's ok, I know there are some times where you can't take me, but hopefully next weekend we will be able to go and ahve our first game with our team

[Lohman446]

Im standing on the sidelines watching this all unfold in front of me at a tournament.

Kid with this autococker is in front of me playing back, laying some pretty good paint and chops a ball... or something that caused a break. So he kneels into the bunker and takes the gun apart to clean it as much as he can, gets up, three more shots same thing. So after he has cleaned the gun three or four times he stands up... you here POW... I watch the bolt fly out the back of the gun and land in the dirt... I'm trying hard not to comment beyond "thats not good". Kid is still pulling the trigger, looking really confused, looks at his gun, looks back at his bolt in the dirt, picks it up and starts to try to clean it off. Just as he gets his gun back together he's bunkered... did have to give him credit for not calling himself out

[Micromag man!]

ok i went to my friends Jeremy and Jays house, and they invited my friend Zale over also. We were all newbs back then. So they have acres of woods and about an acre of nothing but plain land with dirt. So me n Jeremy vs Jay and Zale. 20 minz into the game we havnt even seen anyone. then 5 minz later we look into the pasture only to see the disturbing sight of Zale dancing around with his gun flailing in all directions. I shoot him about 5 times, and he falls to the ground screaming. OK me n jeremy travel around 30 more mintues, now its about dark. We r crouching down in these bushes, and im like lets just go in its getting dark. Hes like naw lets just stay 10 more minz. ok well i let out this LOUD A$$ fart. Jeremys like yoo i heard jay he farted. i was like naw man thats me... jay pops out of the bushes yelling "THAT WAS ONE NASTY FART" and lights us both up. turns out all he heard was my fart, thus giving away where we were, he was right next to us and somehow we didnt notice him... i was laughing so hard. try to hold ur farts in on woods game kidds, its very important.

[minimagjim]

well i got plenty of funny stories. But the one that my friends always bring up is this.

We were at promisedland paintball in WI and it was one of their scenario games. We were trying to device a plan and everyone had there own idea of where to go and what to do. meanwhile the other team is pouring in to our right so we decide to take out their base and go far left. Well this was a good plan and i shouted "FOLLOW ME!" as i turn and ran i slipped a little and my leg was in bad shape from a previous injury on the field. so as i tried to regain my balance i ran right into a TREE!!!

yep i ran face first into a big wide tree. now its funny cause i am known for kicking down small trees or bushes and limbs that are in my way. well the tree won that round...

so now my friends whenever we need to go somewhere on the field always go "lets follow jim, just watch where he's going"

[Bad_Dog]

today at PB Sams, we were playin campground (speedball) and I was in one of the rear standups (east end of field). after about 2 min of play I reloaded and while bending over to reach the pod that I had dropped, I noticed this guy on the opposite tapeline shooting across the field towards me. Realizing that he was useing a rental I figured nothing of it as the paintballs were hitting the ground 2/3 of the way between us. I knelt down to lob some shots back trying to get under the trees in front of me and as I raised my mag a ball from this guy bounced off the ground, broke on my hopper, and goged me at the same time.....


ok, thats not too funny but I think this is.

later in the same game I was on the sidelines "coaching our team". Since some time had passed since I was out there were only a few people left in the game and I think the odds were like 2 to 6 in favor of the other team. Soooooo me and a couple of buddies start "coaching" invisible players to confuse the other team. It held up the game for about 5 min as the other team tried to manuver around our invisible teamates. We even fooled one of the refs into thinking that we had more players.

ok, so none of that was too funny, but in person we were crying when one of the other teams players tried to bunker one of our fake players...

[platinumjason]

One time me and some of my friends were play woodsball a year or so back and a guy was there playing with a 98c with flatline barrel. The guy didnt have the cover thing on the barrel so you could see how it was curved and a kid walked up to him and said his barrels was broke. Not the funniest thing I guess, but we got a kick out of it.

[UltimatePaintballer]

we were playing rec ball at my local field on a wednesday night(cheap night to go, lots of specials) and the place is packed! like 50+ people there. well i got out at the beggining of the game, cause i was at the 50 and got shot out, no angles on anyone there, but everyone has an angle on you. Well i go and clean off my stuff get a drink, etc and i walk back on the field to get my pod, im almost halfway on when i realize the game is still going. so i run off the field and stand to watch the game. well, i picked the right spot to watch it at. the whole night the refs couldn't stress enough not to run the flag back to your side, yet know one could understand this. This pretty heavy guy runs right to the middle, gets the flag, and runs back to his side. on his way to his side he was celebrating and throwing his arms around. One ref goes over to talk to him tellin him that he had to take it to the other side to win. The guy is now mad and decides, what the hell, he tries to run to the other side but gets lit up halfway down the field.


On the same game, i stood watching one guy and my friend runs right up next to him, they decide that they will do a run down on the left side of the field. So one of the guys starts running thinking he was going to bunker about 5 people but gets no one. My friend runs down the field after him and bunkers the guy on his team. For the rest of the night all you heard was, "you bunkered me!" "IM SORRY"