Re: Interracial Dating...Opinions? Advice?
<B>*Miscue the love master adds his 2 cents:*</B>
Attracted is a hard word. Has an interest in you, obviously. To what extent is the unknown part. Don't worry about it for now, it's unimportant really - be patient, these things develop in time (weeks/months) and you don't have to ask her about these things, she will let you know if she wants to. Her finding ways to spend time with you is a good indication. :)
Actually, do yourself a favor and never ask her if she is attracted to you, likes you, or loves you. BAD juju. Here's the thing, she may have some feelings for you, but it hasn't developed into something deep yet. A lot of girls are skeptical, with good reason. And those who are naive learn to be skeptical after getting burned once. Even if you pour your heart out to them they won't necessarily take it in. It is safe for them to do so, and really a smart way to go about things. Putting them on the spot is a good way to get them to start putting up a brick wall and avoid you. I'm not saying that you shouldn't tell them that you care... or even lightly say that you love them - but you have to be really careful when you do this. Don't go about like this, "OH, I LOVE you SOOO Much! I cherish you! I'd do ANYTHING for you!" Ya know... that kinda thing (and these examples are exaggerated really). There's a time and a place.
Spend time with her, talk to her... as much as you can. But avoid being too attached, clingy, or prying. Don't read into anything or build false hopes. The intentions behind what she says or does may be completely different from what you think them to be.
Also be aware that the more you get to know her, you may find that she isn't for you. You'd be surprised how much your perception of them can change once you get to really know the person. The person you know her to be at this moment may not be her at all... which could be good or bad. Or you may find that you're not a good match... hope for the best but keep these things in mind.
Race an issue? Only if you make it to be.
Sweep her off her feet? I personally don't try to make a big effort to 'impress' any girl... but by doing simple things you can impress her... and those things should come naturally and not be contrived. Be thoughtful. Ask her how she's feeling, what's going on in her life. Be interested in those things. Tell her about what's going on with you, but be careful to stay within her attention span/interest by paying attention to her body language and other signals.
Honesty is very impressing. Don't be afraid to be honest and open. When the time comes and if she is receptive to such things, tell her about you and your life that make you vulnerable. Be vulnerable with her, and this allows her to be vulnerable with you if she chooses. Develop trust.
Originally posted by Butterfingers
The thing is that I really like this girl and I don't want to mess things up. I would also like to create oppurtunities where we can spend more time together.
Do you think she is attracted to me?
So do you think race will be an issue?
Hook a brother up with some advice! I need ideas that will really sweep her off her feet.
The thing is that I really like this girl and I don't want to mess things up. I would also like to create oppurtunities where we can spend more time together.
Do you think she is attracted to me?
So do you think race will be an issue?
Hook a brother up with some advice! I need ideas that will really sweep her off her feet.
Attracted is a hard word. Has an interest in you, obviously. To what extent is the unknown part. Don't worry about it for now, it's unimportant really - be patient, these things develop in time (weeks/months) and you don't have to ask her about these things, she will let you know if she wants to. Her finding ways to spend time with you is a good indication. :)
Actually, do yourself a favor and never ask her if she is attracted to you, likes you, or loves you. BAD juju. Here's the thing, she may have some feelings for you, but it hasn't developed into something deep yet. A lot of girls are skeptical, with good reason. And those who are naive learn to be skeptical after getting burned once. Even if you pour your heart out to them they won't necessarily take it in. It is safe for them to do so, and really a smart way to go about things. Putting them on the spot is a good way to get them to start putting up a brick wall and avoid you. I'm not saying that you shouldn't tell them that you care... or even lightly say that you love them - but you have to be really careful when you do this. Don't go about like this, "OH, I LOVE you SOOO Much! I cherish you! I'd do ANYTHING for you!" Ya know... that kinda thing (and these examples are exaggerated really). There's a time and a place.
Spend time with her, talk to her... as much as you can. But avoid being too attached, clingy, or prying. Don't read into anything or build false hopes. The intentions behind what she says or does may be completely different from what you think them to be.
Also be aware that the more you get to know her, you may find that she isn't for you. You'd be surprised how much your perception of them can change once you get to really know the person. The person you know her to be at this moment may not be her at all... which could be good or bad. Or you may find that you're not a good match... hope for the best but keep these things in mind.
Race an issue? Only if you make it to be.
Sweep her off her feet? I personally don't try to make a big effort to 'impress' any girl... but by doing simple things you can impress her... and those things should come naturally and not be contrived. Be thoughtful. Ask her how she's feeling, what's going on in her life. Be interested in those things. Tell her about what's going on with you, but be careful to stay within her attention span/interest by paying attention to her body language and other signals.
Honesty is very impressing. Don't be afraid to be honest and open. When the time comes and if she is receptive to such things, tell her about you and your life that make you vulnerable. Be vulnerable with her, and this allows her to be vulnerable with you if she chooses. Develop trust.
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