When does 'No' mean 'No'?

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  • Archangel Zer0
    World's Calmest Man
    • Feb 2005
    • 72

    #31
    Originally posted by SpecialBlend2786
    The girls that think they have control of the situation are not the only girls that get raped. So in your reality you show no sympathy for a girl that goes through that? You show no sympathy for a miscalculation? for a girl thinking that she knows a guy as a friend, only to find out that the only thing he wants is her body?
    How could you tell someone not to feel sorry for a friend? Where the **** are your morals, or more importantly your heart.

    I think that if a close friend of yours was raped, someone who you really cared about, you'd feel something.
    If not you're no better then the guys that do this ****.
    Are you out of your mind? This girl has been through this three times and she'll hang out with him again why? She needs to take some responsibility, kick the freak out of her room, and report the situation to her RA, dorm supervisor, College Board, etc.

    You learn as a small child to keep your hands out of fire or you'll get burned. Since this girl seems to not want to learn that lesson she'll probably end up getting hurt. Is it sad? Sure, but she has the power to stop it now. She is making a choice not to. No pity here, either.

    This victim mentality we have going on in America needs to stop.
    "Luckily for Hammerhead, there's a sucker born every minute." - Miscue

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    • SpecialBlend2786
      Registered User
      • Jun 2003
      • 4023

      #32
      Originally posted by Miscue
      You're misunderstanding my point of view... going off on a tangent.... and have no idea of what my personal experience has been with this subject. I won't explain, I don't want to talk about it.

      Certain types of sex offenders are among the lowest scum in my mind and should be hung by their genitals.

      Note that I said "little sympathy," not "no sympathy." Interpret that how you wish. My sympathy for children... someone who had a random attacker... things of this sort - is going to be different from a girl who keeps hanging around a guy that's been acting stupid.

      Note the part where he said: "she's still hanging out with him a 3rd time." Is she making large efforts in trying to avoid him?
      She opens her dorm room door, see's the guy down the hall and slams it. She avoids him at all costs. I'd say she's making an effort to avoid him.

      She isn't ASKING for anything. The two other times have been MINOR, and if i understand correctly this is the first serious attempt where there was a physical incident. After things turned physical she's been avoiding him.

      If something happens now, even after she's made all efforts to avoid him, including contacting her RA, is it still her fault? Would you still show little sympathy?

      You're not the only one with personal experience on this subject.

      Comment

      • SpecialBlend2786
        Registered User
        • Jun 2003
        • 4023

        #33
        Originally posted by Archangel Zer0
        Are you out of your mind? This girl has been through this three times and she'll hang out with him again why? She needs to take some responsibility, kick the freak out of her room, and report the situation to her RA, dorm supervisor, College Board, etc.

        You learn as a small child to keep your hands out of fire or you'll get burned. Since this girl seems to not want to learn that lesson she'll probably end up getting hurt. Is it sad? Sure, but she has the power to stop it now. She is making a choice not to. No pity here, either.

        This victim mentality we have going on in America needs to stop.
        SHGE"S ALREADY CONTACTED HER ****ING RA! SHE"S ALREADY MADE EVERY ATTEMPT TO STAY AWAY! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT??!?

        WHERE was it said that she had hung out with him after this third time?! where was it said that she wants to have ANYTHING to do with him anymore?!

        Comment

        • tropical_fishy
          KART
          • Oct 2004
          • 1017

          #34
          Azaam, chill out, or Derek's gonna delete the thread. Let it go. Stop posting.

          Comment

          • slade
            Carpe Noctem
            • Apr 2004
            • 3442

            #35
            Originally posted by Miscue
            Is she making large efforts in trying to avoid him?
            id say yes.

            Originally posted by Archangel Zer0
            Are you out of your mind? This girl has been through this three times and she'll hang out with him again why? She needs to take some responsibility, kick the freak out of her room, and report the situation to her RA, dorm supervisor, College Board, etc.

            You learn as a small child to keep your hands out of fire or you'll get burned. Since this girl seems to not want to learn that lesson she'll probably end up getting hurt. Is it sad? Sure, but she has the power to stop it now. She is making a choice not to. No pity here, either.

            This victim mentality we have going on in America needs to stop.
            read the first post again. she SAID why she didnt do anything at first. he stopped pursuing it and seemed like he was accepting her wishes, and accepting that they were to be friends only. but the last time it clearly went over that line. dont assume she hasnt taken responsibility for it, youre assuming too much, dont jump to conclusions. she HAS reported it to her RA, but he hasnt done much about it.

            oh, and to you, miscue and everyone who says shes stupid etc for being around him. ive talked to her too. shes at college, and he lives 2 doors down from her. she opens the door, and hes walking by in the hall. her dorm has a party? hes there. its not like shes calling him up and saying, "hey, want to get together, you know so you can make me uncomfortable and sexually assault me again?" shes not stupid, and after he slapped her she definately DOESNT want to be anywhere near him. but also its not like shes going to hide in her room her room for 4 years, shes going to go out which means shes likely to run into him.
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            • Miscue
              Super Moderator

              • Oct 2000
              • 7105

              #36
              Originally posted by SpecialBlend2786
              I think that if a close friend of yours was raped, someone who you really cared about, you'd feel something.
              If not you're no better then the guys that do this ****.
              I cannot explain to you how angry your comments have made me and the self-restraint it took to keep civil - I don't think you would have liked my first draft of this post.

              Holding someone as tight as you can who just told you, "I've been raped..." crying with her - as helpless as I felt I knew I could not know what she felt. And that's just the beginning. Multiple people, multiple stories... long periods of dealing with the aftermath... I don't want to get into it any further. I'm not saying that you don't have your experiences, or am trying to make any comparisons... but don't tell me that I am as bad as them.

              Comment

              • SpecialBlend2786
                Registered User
                • Jun 2003
                • 4023

                #37
                Originally posted by Miscue
                I cannot explain to you how angry your comments have made me and the self-restraint it took to keep civil - I don't think you would have liked my first draft of this post.

                Holding someone as tight as you can who just told you, "I've been raped..." crying with her - as helpless as I felt I knew I could not know what she felt. And that's just the beginning. Multiple people, multiple stories... long periods of dealing with the aftermath... I don't want to get into it any further. I'm not saying that you don't have your experiences, or am trying to make any comparisons... but don't tell me that I am as bad as them.
                that was in bad taste, I wasn't thinking straight, and i'm sorry for saying what i did.

                Just got angry, ya know? Having someone tell me not to feel sorry for her if she gets hurt.

                I'll srtop posting now

                Comment

                • Recon by Fire
                  Enimo Et Fide
                  • Mar 2003
                  • 1706

                  #38
                  Originally posted by slade
                  that post was not needed at all. you just essentially said the girl is overreacting and immature, while insulting derek at the same time, and possibly implying that she is using him.

                  No, you have it wrong. I am just advising him to be wary of women who would lure you into being a knight in shining armor. These women are pretty much trouble with a capital T.

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                  • Indignant

                    #39
                    Well this one isn't, so leave. This thread will probably be gone soon anyways.

                    Comment

                    • Cameo
                      Registered User
                      • Dec 2004
                      • 590

                      #40
                      Originally posted by Dubstar112
                      Agreed, but there is whackos out there who just dont get it.
                      They don't get it because some girls like to play mind games. they like to say no to see how far a guy will push it. they say the oposite of what they mean and it confuses the guy. Some will say things just to get a reaction.. If you find one of these girls run far far away.


                      But a basic rule to be safe is if she says no, then don't.
                      "You are wonderful, whitty, and wise, but you spend to much time reading this sort of TRASH."

                      Comment

                      • mutigerfan04
                        Registered User
                        • Jul 2005
                        • 168

                        #41
                        Originally posted by Cameo
                        They don't get it because some girls like to play mind games. they like to say no to see how far a guy will push it. they say the oposite of what they mean and it confuses the guy. Some will say things just to get a reaction.. If you find one of these girls run far far away.


                        But a basic rule to be safe is if she says no, then don't.
                        Bravo well put.

                        Comment

                        • devildog
                          I hate my user name
                          • Oct 2002
                          • 1530

                          #42
                          i didnt read this whole thing, but my point of view is there is 2 sides to every story. im not saying i dont believe, just remember that.

                          also, i agree with the guy above about the mind games. women are wierd, they dont even know what they want. most of the time.
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                          • SpecialBlend2786
                            Registered User
                            • Jun 2003
                            • 4023

                            #43
                            Originally posted by devildog
                            i didnt read this whole thing, but my point of view is there is 2 sides to every story. im not saying i dont believe, just remember that.

                            also, i agree with the guy above about the mind games. women are wierd, they dont even know what they want. most of the time.
                            Well, in this case i'm sure that when she said no, she ment no.

                            Comment

                            • Dubstar112
                              Dubstar111x
                              • Feb 2001
                              • 2321

                              #44
                              Thats kinda where I was headed, but I didnt want to offend anyone, and I think the title answered itself way before anyone replied.
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