Tell Us Your Best Noob stories

[MrMag]

Originally posted by FalconGuy016
I was never much of a n00b... I kind of jumped into the game

thats funny cause i remember you posting a pic of yourself a pevs tourney with your guns over your head shooting while looking down.............................

[Archangel Kid]

second or third time playing, i was at pinelands and i shot about 20 shots with my F4 over the chron and i wondered y i was getting readings like 120,130, and 135 tops... i crank my velocity all the way up and i'm getting like 150's 160's... then a guy told my bolt was upside down ... ZING!!... thank god i was still considered a nub

[BTAutoMag]

i was at at field one day, first day ever playing with a warp. i dropped this really small part into the grass behind my table so i crouched down and looked for it... while i was down i heard two people walking by and then they gasp and run up to the table... "OMG dude this is the New 2002 E-mag (i have a 1991 classic)" "really wow" "yea man, the only two modes on it are turbo and full auto" "holy shiet" yea these cost a little over 2000 dollars...(at this point i stand up and they get quiet) i reach over and grab my beast, "like my emag?"
"OMG yea"
"lemme guess, youve heard a lot about them?"
"yup, i know everything about them, i even know Mr. Kate"
"well if you know so much, where do they keep the battery (keep in mind ITS A CLASSIC)
"in the round tube on the back"
"well ill give you that one... listen, im having a small tech issue, since you seem to know so much and im a little new at this you wanna give me a hand?"
"i think i got some time."
"sweet, well i have a small leak down the barrel that i think is being caused by the oring in the power tube tip, the problem is im having bolt stick and i have no clue how to cock it... does it have to be cocked to take out the bolt?"

...

"uh yea it has to be cocked"
"how do i cock it?"
"its rear cocking, kinda hidden and hard to find"
"oh (i look at the mag) ill just work on that later, BTW, my warp is having trouble with its grippy disk thingie and it seems to be spinning the wrong way. I think it could be... (interupted)
"oh you see that switch on the back, you have to flik that into forward mode" (i had installed an on off switch the previous day)
"wow i have no clue what you are talking about (i put it down) you fix it"
"im sorry i cant, im late for a game, got to jet"

i wish i had a camera

[gamarada717]

In my first game ever...I thought the ref was on the other team. They all had on orange, and so did the ref. I thought he was gonna kill me....

About a year ago, I told my band directors we should play paintball some time. We go with a huge group, and in my group was a kid named Cody. Cody's gun wouldn't fire, so he calls a ref over and points the gun at the ref, and say, "My gun won't work!" With that, he pulled the trigger and the ref got one in the mask.

And last, I'm not sure if this is noobish or not, but I used to shoot acorns and dog food out of my talon. Still think that was awesome.

[FreakBaller12]

haha newbs are the funniest thing in paintball...it's jsut sad remindign yourself you were once one too and peopel laughed at u

[Riot[Z-Grip]]

I don't know about everyone else, but the people I started playing with.. we all thought that markers with nitro hurt more. "Woah man.. he's got NITRO! I don't want to play with him!" =)

-Riot

[DaisyDuke]

I'm still a newbie, I think, but my very first game I went right out with my Rainmaker... did all right, I wanted to get shot so i could see if it hurt but I played like three games and no one shot me ( I did eventually get shot... right in the inner thighs, ouchie... but I loved the game by them too much to care)... I was so scared I think every muscle in my body was sore that night, from being strained. I think i was trying to make myself very very small, so that no one could see me behind the bunker. And I wore something like four layers of clothes, because I was afraid of how it would hurt.
The stupidest thing... I wasn't used to how touchy the RM's trigger is (very very touchy!), nor how to handle the gun in general, and I had the barrel plug in... I was talking to someone and they wanted my gun, and as I went to hand it over I brushed the trigger and SPLAT! confetti went flying, high velocity, out of the ports on my barrel, all over everyone present... yay for barrel plugs! (although I use a long condom now, to ensure that if that ever DOES happen again no one gets sprayed).

[JT2002]

nooby story...
noob walks over and looks at my classic mag
"Hey, is than an Angel?"

seeing a kid play speedball with a 21" spyder barrel.

watching a group of 10 or more nubs playing a speedball game, the ref counts down, "5, 4, 3, 2, 1, GOGOGOGO!" where do all of the 10 n00bs go? each of them hide behind the 1 closest lay down can and huddle.

yeah all the noobs start at and look funny at my warp feed. and say, "Is that teh hopper?" .

[Torbo]

Originally posted by IWannaRiot979
I don't know about everyone else, but the people I started playing with.. we all thought that markers with nitro hurt more. "Woah man.. he's got NITRO! I don't want to play with him!" =)

-Riot

yep, me too.

And i got another one: We were playing woods, in a big fortress deal, with a cone in the middle. so it was attack/defend the fortress, with the cone being the objective of the attacking team. I donno if its a newbie deal, but the ref standing by the door ran towords the cone to check if a player was hit. I shot him. Well, more like lit him up. It was bad.

[rjvemt1]

I was never much of a n00b... I kind of jumped into the game

'vanity, thy name is falconguy'

i have a question for everyone, where did the term 'newbie' come from? only answer if you got your drivers license before i bought my first mag('91)!

[Blazestorm]

18" barrels rule!

Well let see...

I thought I'd be a sniper forever, I thought oil fixed everything, I thought spending 500 bucks on my spyder made it better, I was scared of getting shot, and the likily hood of me shooting more than 5 people in a day was rare, and I thought my spyder was the coolest gun ever.

ERm... yah.

And I still think 18" barrels rule.

I plan on buying an 18" tip for whatever barrle kit I get with my next gun.

[lord1234]

Well, i have a similar experience about a n00b being afraid of how much it would hurt... I took him to play and he loves it...went out and bought himself a mag...good to see that i converted someone...

Next: I had this newbie walk up, look at my classic and say DUDE is that an Angel, I say "nope its a Automag 68", he says (dejectedly)"oh mags are for ....." next game...i ran to his bunker, bunkered his behind and when he was walking off the field i yelled..."I guess mags still suck huh?", he didnt speak to me again...


--Lord

[MrMag]

oops i kinda forgot to include my stories......

like many other i thought that n2 made your gun shoot harder.

i thought that intimidators were electro cockers.

the longer your barrel the more accurate

[aaron_mag]

First time I went was indoor. My brother and friends had already played so I was the new guy. I remember being terrified by all the fire so I croched into a bunker. When I finally had the courage to poke my head up I saw all these players ahead of me with their backs to me and started trying to light them up. They were, of course, my own team that had advanced.

Luckily for them I didn't take out my barrel plug from my rental so all I did was break a bunch of paint in the barrel rather than take out my entire team. This BTW is not a kid story as I was mid 20s at the time! The field owner was pretty nice and just exchanged my rental for another marker for the next game!!!

[plmcmahon]

i was chrono'ing, and i didnt know i have my powerfeed plug turned around, so i was shooting about 100 shots with air over the chrono trying to get a reading

LOL, Brak.

I did this too. I kept thinking, "What is wrong with this stupid chrono?" I turned it off and on again... still no dice. I finally realized the PF plug was set to "embarass" position. There were others waiting to chrono, I don't know if they noticed or not (or cared).