Official "Stupidest Thing a Customer has said" thread

[stop whining buy a mag]

8 hours for 6 employees to set a plano?


(snickers)

The reset teams can do it faster, but judging by the pace that the normal employees work at, it would take them forever. It took me and my dad 4 hours to reset one 8 foot bay at the Lowes Planogram Studio. Most stores will have five full bays (40 feet) to reset. Taking out all the product would take them at least an hour if they don't kill anyone taking down the overstock behind the barn doors. Then they have to climb into the bays and remove all the shelfs and replace them in their correct spots. Again, without killing themselves. Then you would have to hope that the smartest of the group looks at the plano and figures out where everything is going. After putting in some of the old product and some new products I'm sure it would take them 4 hours if they didn't screw anything up.

This is why Lowes hires National Vendor Services to do it.

I ran into to more rude NJ people last night. The store was going to close in 15 minutes so the person didn't feel like they had to help me do something that would take one minute.

I also have the feeling I'm going to get {female dogged} at because some of these stores won't be right. I can't help it if your employees can't count.

[Altimas]

this crap never stops... Everyone get so frustrated with our Automated Answering Service because it doesnt get the First three letters of peoples contract #s right. So She comes to me and is fuming So I say...
"May I have your contract number please?"
"Oh Sure...you thing you can understand it?"
"I'll do my best.."
"Well its X as in Exciting, A as in apple, A as in ******* computer system!!"

I LOLed

[ScatterPlot]

Back to planos...

I worked at Best Buy last summer and we would do planos like it was going out of style. I don't know about a warehouse type of store, but we would reset each plano maybe once a month, sometimes more or less depending on size or whatever. We'd do those things lightning fast, but the reset team that would do some of it could do it even faster.

[stop whining buy a mag]

This past Monday, several people from the reset company and the other vendors met my dad at a Lowes in Chicago. I tagged along since this was the test store and I could probably learn something that would help me when calling stores. Basically, everyone was there to see what problems would come up during a reset. Any problems could be addressed immediately since all the powers were there. The only problem was, some of the new product was not there. We spent 3 hours looking for some boxes while another skid had accidentally been shipped to a different store in Chicago and had to be immediately sent to us.

They ended up finding everything and started pulling boxes off the shelves. There were about 12 people standing in the aisle with boxes everywhere. Most customers would turn the corner and say something like "looks like they are doing something here!". One customer got an associate to come down the aisle with him and dig through the boxes for something he was looking for. I could tell they were frustrated (and dumb) when they stood up and exclaimed "NOTHING IS ORGANIZED HERE!".

Duh duh duh.

[TheAngryDrunkenRussian]

wasn't a costumer but still the best thing that happened.

Kubota if you know it's blaze orange and black, marked with slow moving triangle and flashing lights.



some guy rear ended it saying it "blended in" tell me how does a blaze orange tractor blend in to building?

response from the employee to the police . "hey tard It's blaze orange" cops just sat back and laughed

[Cow hunter]

http://www.improveverywhere.com/mission_view.php?mission_id=57

not exaclty the stupidest thing a customer has said, but its funny

[Cameo]

As most everyone knows I work as a Daylight Restaurant Manager/ Bartender. On thursday we got busy enough that I had to sneak away from my computer and desk and orders and go take care of customers during lunch. there were a few people at the actual bar and I started getting them drinks and what not.. Two of the females I took care of were "life partners" and one of course was very dominate and "butch", the other was quite submissive and "feminine".
I had gotten their drinks and turned around to the register to get thier change when the butch one said "Damn that is a big Azz tuna, I don't think I could eat all of that". I was moritfied, I know that I have gainded a few pounds but nothing to get that type of a reaction outta someone. I was scared to turn around. Then I glanced at the tv to my right and realized that FSN had a fishing show on...
That was a relief!!

[skife]

I work at meijer.
For those of you that arn't from Michigan, Ohio, Kentucky, or Indiana.
We're open Every day and night except christmas.

2 nights ago this lady asks a buddy of mine what time we close.... it is 1:15 in the morning...
It made me laugh, it says OPEN 24 HOURS right on the sign. Its been open for 24 hours since like the 70's.

Then at 12:30 some lady wanted a rug doctor... WTF? late night ambition to clean your carpets. Turns out it was my moms aunt

[ScatterPlot]

Altimas when you gonna post up some more stuff? That site is hilarious!

[Altimas]

Yeah I have been slacking lately I have baseball right now and World of Warcrack...But I do have two Ive almost finished. I'll get them up this week.

[warbeak2099]

Ok here's a good one. BTW this is still at the supermarket where I'm a cashier.

One of our cashiers is a 30yo woman who's an unemployed software engineer. To make matters worse, she doesn't exactly look like... well a woman. She's about 350 pounds with tons earings and quite dikish short hair. She is very very flamboyant and the customers always notice her heh heh.

Now, a guy looking and sounding like he was from texas came through my line one day. He had on a ten gallon hat and everything lol. Real thick accent too. Mind you, this is upstate NY. Anyways, he asked me about this other cashier, Sophie. "What's with that guy with all the earings acting all wierd man?" My mouth dropped haha. I said, "That's actually a female sir hehe." His response, "Oh, sh--! That sucker looks like a hefty man!" "That's ok sir, no one realizes it's a woman until we're told." I like him, best customer ever.

Then there were the two... "alternate lifestyle" men complaining that I crushed their chocolate chip cookies when I put them in their shopping cart. They had a $300 order too so it went on for a while lol.

[thecavemankevin]

Then at 12:30 some lady wanted a rug doctor... WTF? late night ambition to clean your carpets. Turns out it was my moms aunt

perhaps your moms uncle pissed her off and now she needs to get the blood out of the carpet before a stain sets in

[Cow hunter]

Yeah I have been slacking lately I have baseball right now and World of Warcrack...But I do have two Ive almost finished. I'll get them up this week.

never updated....... i enjoy reading your stories too

/anyone got more?

[Altimas]

Yeah I knowIm a horrible slacker lately. DAMN YOU WORLD OF WARCRAFT!

[MarkM]

This isn't technically something a customer said but more a comment on customers themselves. On one of my trips to America I went into a store, may have been Walmart or K-Mart I really can't remember but I was looking for socks, found them, bought them, great except on the bag they were sold in was pictures showing how to put on a sock....I just find that disturbing